Forget my last update
Hello, tonight while skimming through my friends on live journal I came across a certain entry. It has been really making me think about things that seem a little more important then the usual here's what I did tonight. I've been thinking about death. I dont know if you even read my live journal or not but yours made me think. I really dont know how i would react if i were to lose a friend. The only person in my life i have ever lost that was close to me was my grandpa and he lived in florida so i guess that kind of lessened the blow. I attended his funeral and I can remember telling myself not to cry. I sat there with the largest lump in my throat i have ever felt. I can only imagine what its like to lose a close friend. I really hope i never have to deal with anything like that in my lifetime. To be honest i dont even know the name of the person who died tonight. For all i know it could be someone i know or was connected to. How do i react to a death? what am i supposed to feel? I really dont like thinking about it because all i can think of is being at there funeral and thinking "dont cry, be tough, it'll be ok" As bad as it would be to lose a friend i dont know if it were to compare to losing a close family member like your mother or father. Just to think that they wont be there when i wake up, or need to ask a question, or want a refill of my drink.
No one to "really" turn to when you have questions about becoming an adult, getting married, raising kids. All this talk about dying makes me think about what would happen if i were to die somehow. I feel very fortunate that there are people in my life that who truly care if i were to pass away. Im being a little dramatic i know. When people die i seem to hear the phrase "cherish the time you have with them now while you can" and things among that nature. I really dont see myself as the person who will take that to heart. Im the person who does say "it cant or wont happen to me" I really do feel there is a plan in this world for all of us. gods will is exactly what it says, god will. Things happen you might not see fair or right but by that point it is already to late. You can only change the future. The past should be used to learn from your mistakes and not gloomed upon. Think hat you will, i felt this was something i wanted to say to you all. Its not 5 am and the sun will soon peak its face over the horizon to reveal a new day. Try to make the best of it.
-Justin
No one to "really" turn to when you have questions about becoming an adult, getting married, raising kids. All this talk about dying makes me think about what would happen if i were to die somehow. I feel very fortunate that there are people in my life that who truly care if i were to pass away. Im being a little dramatic i know. When people die i seem to hear the phrase "cherish the time you have with them now while you can" and things among that nature. I really dont see myself as the person who will take that to heart. Im the person who does say "it cant or wont happen to me" I really do feel there is a plan in this world for all of us. gods will is exactly what it says, god will. Things happen you might not see fair or right but by that point it is already to late. You can only change the future. The past should be used to learn from your mistakes and not gloomed upon. Think hat you will, i felt this was something i wanted to say to you all. Its not 5 am and the sun will soon peak its face over the horizon to reveal a new day. Try to make the best of it.
-Justin