(no subject)
I started reading the book. Remarkable.
I'm growing more and more tired of playing this waiting game. When I told my friends I might be planning something else tonight, they strongly recommended I blow those plans off and join them for a night of revelry. While I didn't blow off my plans, they still didn't work out. I was later told by a close pal that he was glad I didn't go through with what I had originally wanted. Turns out, my friends are right most of the time. I had a blast at hookah making fun of the girls who had come in to meet Josh. Not so much the one he was gaming on, but the one who came with her. This casual flirting thing is a riot.
Despite what my non-muffin friends might say about the muffins, they are a class group of people. I hope that never changes.
Thanks Clay.
I still want her back. That doesn't necessarily mean I'm actively pursuing it, but it is right there in my mind with all sorts of other things.
On that note, stress seems to be killing me faster than it was before. I went to the hospital this week to check the ulcer, and while it still isn't as bad as it was last spring, it's getting there. I'm trying to eliminate as many stressors from my life as possible, but that is certainly easier said than done. I thrive on some of that stress. I ask for it. I live for it, no matter how counterproductive it may be. I just want everything to come to a concrete resolution so I can go on living comfortably.
Still no power at the apartment. Still nothing I can do about it. Despite my lack of proper housing, I was recently ordered to pay the full rent for this month or face eviction, and no matter how much I could've fought it and won, I bowed and paid. Now I'm practically broke until I get paid on Wednesday. A sad fate indeed. After all these years, I still can't manage to have a sane and comfortable living situation. Even living alone, there always has to be something.
Earl makes sense.
Wine and xanax are a delicious combination. They make for poignant LJ posts for sure.
I miss kissing at intersections. This thought will probably invoke a 'top ten things I miss' post on myspace.
Whoever said love is a many spendored thing was probably drunk on early romance. I guarantee he/she didn't write that after dealing with that first hurt. Funny how humans can convince themselves of how perfect everything is right up to the point where they become wrong. Most humans want to believe life is perfect. Maybe by pulling that wool, they can easily convince themselves that this is all worth it. Oh, what a foolish web we weave.
You'd better come back soon if you're coming back at all, love. Missing you is too hard for words, but I can't emotionally afford to miss you much longer. I told you I hate to wait. Please don't keep me waiting much longer. I would hate for all this heart I've spent to be a waste in the end.
Sorry, Danny. Keep your head up.
I feel closer than ever to my friends. The unprovoked self-conscious feeling I have had lately has gone the way of the dodo. Sometimes it's hard to recognize the ways that people care, but they really do. Subtlety is such a gem in the world of companionship.
HAY TOOS. The Saint was more fun than expected. Photo booths rule.
This has gone on long enough! I'm done opening my heart to the internet. People should call me. I might be a sad sack at times, but right now, these are the best of times. As opposed to the worst.
MOD DANCE SATURDAY!
Non-emo lyrics time.
Your romantic rights are all that you got,
Push'em down son it's more than just lip,
C'mon girl I know you know what you want,
C'mon c'mon now and give'em all shhhh
You're beating walls now you just won't quit,
You play with shapes but they just won't fit,
I know you love me you don't know what you like,
You're watching TV I stay up all night.
I don't need you, I want you
South Carolina kid is heating things up,
His wounds are bleeding and we're filling the cup,
This game will save us if we don't die young,
C'mon c'mon yeah, have some fun.
Come here baby I love your company,
We could do it and start a family,
She was living alone, unhappily
We could do it, it's right romantically.
I don't need you, I want you
I'm growing more and more tired of playing this waiting game. When I told my friends I might be planning something else tonight, they strongly recommended I blow those plans off and join them for a night of revelry. While I didn't blow off my plans, they still didn't work out. I was later told by a close pal that he was glad I didn't go through with what I had originally wanted. Turns out, my friends are right most of the time. I had a blast at hookah making fun of the girls who had come in to meet Josh. Not so much the one he was gaming on, but the one who came with her. This casual flirting thing is a riot.
Despite what my non-muffin friends might say about the muffins, they are a class group of people. I hope that never changes.
Thanks Clay.
I still want her back. That doesn't necessarily mean I'm actively pursuing it, but it is right there in my mind with all sorts of other things.
On that note, stress seems to be killing me faster than it was before. I went to the hospital this week to check the ulcer, and while it still isn't as bad as it was last spring, it's getting there. I'm trying to eliminate as many stressors from my life as possible, but that is certainly easier said than done. I thrive on some of that stress. I ask for it. I live for it, no matter how counterproductive it may be. I just want everything to come to a concrete resolution so I can go on living comfortably.
Still no power at the apartment. Still nothing I can do about it. Despite my lack of proper housing, I was recently ordered to pay the full rent for this month or face eviction, and no matter how much I could've fought it and won, I bowed and paid. Now I'm practically broke until I get paid on Wednesday. A sad fate indeed. After all these years, I still can't manage to have a sane and comfortable living situation. Even living alone, there always has to be something.
Earl makes sense.
Wine and xanax are a delicious combination. They make for poignant LJ posts for sure.
I miss kissing at intersections. This thought will probably invoke a 'top ten things I miss' post on myspace.
Whoever said love is a many spendored thing was probably drunk on early romance. I guarantee he/she didn't write that after dealing with that first hurt. Funny how humans can convince themselves of how perfect everything is right up to the point where they become wrong. Most humans want to believe life is perfect. Maybe by pulling that wool, they can easily convince themselves that this is all worth it. Oh, what a foolish web we weave.
You'd better come back soon if you're coming back at all, love. Missing you is too hard for words, but I can't emotionally afford to miss you much longer. I told you I hate to wait. Please don't keep me waiting much longer. I would hate for all this heart I've spent to be a waste in the end.
Sorry, Danny. Keep your head up.
I feel closer than ever to my friends. The unprovoked self-conscious feeling I have had lately has gone the way of the dodo. Sometimes it's hard to recognize the ways that people care, but they really do. Subtlety is such a gem in the world of companionship.
HAY TOOS. The Saint was more fun than expected. Photo booths rule.
This has gone on long enough! I'm done opening my heart to the internet. People should call me. I might be a sad sack at times, but right now, these are the best of times. As opposed to the worst.
MOD DANCE SATURDAY!
Non-emo lyrics time.
Your romantic rights are all that you got,
Push'em down son it's more than just lip,
C'mon girl I know you know what you want,
C'mon c'mon now and give'em all shhhh
You're beating walls now you just won't quit,
You play with shapes but they just won't fit,
I know you love me you don't know what you like,
You're watching TV I stay up all night.
I don't need you, I want you
South Carolina kid is heating things up,
His wounds are bleeding and we're filling the cup,
This game will save us if we don't die young,
C'mon c'mon yeah, have some fun.
Come here baby I love your company,
We could do it and start a family,
She was living alone, unhappily
We could do it, it's right romantically.
I don't need you, I want you