County roads....take me away
Idol night featuring music of the 21st century was awful and odd…but apparently just a precursor of the mess that was 'Country' night. No longer confined to the span of 5 years or so, the contestants purportedly had generations of country music to select from, and with very few exceptions, their choices were obscure, boring, poor, and amazingly weird. What the heck is in the water - or the air perhaps? I sense something stirring, such as a wind of discontent in the ranks or an uprising in the works….
How what appeared to be the best group of talent ever continues to disappoint is a mystery.
Kellie:
Not impressive vocally or personality-wise, Kellie has apparently decided to 'buy' her way into fans hearts; flying in her personal hair dresser who reportedly charged $300 for last night's do, and spending what Miles Siggins, Idol wardrobe stylist, described as 'the most ever spent by a contestant on fashion' for last night's scanty camisole. All this extravagance on the same day as an article about the sacrifices of idol's families reported that her grandpa was 'staying at a Howard Johnson hotel near the airport and friends have helped out with the cost. But he's been using taxis to ferry him the long distances around the city that gets kind of expensive.' Bearing in mind Kellie's sad soap-opera-life stories, makes you wonder, don't it? If I was one of those friends helping foot the bill, I might be a tad upset at Kellie's decision to get a little fancy. Anyway, Country theme should have been her strong night. Reba's 'Fancy' was definitely a better song choice than 'Bubbly Bucket', but the performance was the same usual lackluster offering as last week. She failed to cash in (even with all the cash out(lay) on what was her best opportunity to shine. Maybe that is all the sheen she has in her. The hair didn't look like 300 bucks either, although I admit it was hard to take your eyes off slightly below her shoulders, even for an old heterosexual lady, but that won't get my vote, tho it might get some others to phone in.
Chris:
Chris singing probably the only country song he knows, even if his entire family loves country, still looked unhappy to me. Well within his comfort zone, having reportedly sang it to his wife at their wedding, he did a decent job on the vocals. But - for the love of heaven does this guy have ANY PERSONALITY at all???? Can he smile? Who the heck are we painfully watching week after week. Is it so difficult for him to perform that he must appear to be in pain every moment on stage or is he just channeling my pain at having to watch him? I am doing my part to put him out of his misery.
Ace:
Can you say b-o-r-i-n-g? Oh, please! By the time Ace reached the part of his performance that degenerated to cat-er-wauling, I wanted to make that same sound myself because that nasal whine was like a nail being hammered into my brain by then. If there is any justice in idol voting, please let the air-headed, one-look, Romeo-wanna-be go home! There is a reason why he is still available, Ryan. I caught Ace on the rerun of Half & Half this week and can report that his acting is as vapid as his singing and to me he isn't pretty enough to be a model, though he appears to have the brains for it. Can you say, G-o-o-d-b-y-e? Lord, I hope so! Bottom of the bottom three.
Mandisa:
Singing the song that has more words than all of Kenny's together (says Mr. Rogers), Mandisa ran out of steam, breath, and vocals. The usually articulate diva did not articulate well and showed no voice versatility at all. I know this woman has a powerful voice and I always heard if you could 'really sing' you could sing anything. I am starting to believe she can't sing anything. I have to add - Mandisa has a strikingly beautiful face and smile and needs to play up her strengths. What the he$$ happened to their style adviser? Mr. Siggins must have been with Kellie for the 3-1/2 hour shopping spree that produced the red lingerie because he let Mandisa slip through the gapping hole in the wall. I myself am somewhat overweight (about 30 lbs actually) and I wouldn't be caught dead in my own back yard in that outfit Mandisa wore on national television. Has no one ever told her that big girls should wear vertical stripes and avoid those that are oriented for sunsets at all costs? Not to mention, no lovely plus size woman should ever show that much skin to that many people. And those jeans - no matter how much I shout - NEVER WEAR THOSE JEANS, they just keep turning up. Miles Siggins needs to be fired.
Bucky:
Also in his element with a Country Theme and years and years of country music to select from - Bucky picked an obscure Gary Allen tune to showcase his talent. Ask yourself this; you are among nine finalists on the biggest talent search in the US and the genre at hand is your bread-and-butter - wouldn't you take that opportunity to sing the one song you know inside out and upside down - the one you think is your personal best? No way I am believing this was it. If there were problems with song rights, you slide to your second best - I am thinking this had to be pretty far down the line. For the first time, I who talk country like nobody's business, joined the ranks of those who could not understand one word of what Bucky sang. (More on this later). Aside from all this, he did an OK job and seemed his most comfortable on stage - I thinking sitting down was a good idea, his posture indicates he has been trying to do that on every show so far. The little contrived stylized look in the camera at the end, while a cute idea, (probably stolen from Ace), but was just another distraction for Bucky, who needs to concentrate all his efforts on singing. Still, I love the guy and am not ready for him to go home just yet.
Paris:
Did Paris perform? Oh, yes, she was chilled out, simplified down, and gussied up and performed "How Can I Live Without You'. One of the better songs selected, but not necessarily for her. The consummate musician with a singing voice that rivals most lost her key in the beginning and was uninteresting once she located it. Unfortunately for these idols, this genre did its job, which it to display a hint of versatility or lack thereof, and the lack thereof won out. Maybe we will be living without Paris after tonight? I think she will be joining Ace and Katharine in the bottom three.
Elliott:
Moments of greatness, well as least 'pretty goodness', danced through Elliott's version of Garth's 'If Tomorrow Never Comes'. Unfortunately there were more of the other moments, when he stumbled into what Kenny described best about Elliott: using his singing acrobatics to impress and yet failing to entertain. May he was hoping last night that if tomorrow never comes, he wouldn’t be the one going home tonight.
Katharine:
An Elvis fan from the original days, I have never heard that truly OBSCURE mess Katharine performed - and I will be happy to never have to hear it again. The only words I retained (or understood) were the refrain about Elvis (can't actually retain the refrain at the moment) and the word hips. Another performer with a good vocal range, but absolutely not one whit of performing range, Katharine has the personality level of Chris, the voice of Paris, and the limited versatility of nearly every other contestant and all together that makes one uninteresting performer. I think she should be back in the bottom three tonight.
Taylor:
The individual who performed that horrid John Denver song (not country) did a pretty credible job on the vocals even in the face of: being drowned out by a symphony orchestra, (who should never be allowed to play country and who quieted down after Taylor's performance); being rushed by an arrangement that made it seem those country roads were 'running' him home; and being upstaged by a parody of Charlie Daniels front stage. He had a lovely smile that flashed occasionally, but I wonder where Taylor was. Emotionally he never showed up. Although I love this guy and his talent and I spend way too many of my waking moments looking at, reading about, watching, and listening to him - I know I don't know him at all. He is just a very talented, extremely charismatic young entertainer that has won me over with his southern charm, his phenomenal ability, and his unique personality. That is why I can't say what the problem is. Is he being 'trained' to lose his identity? Is he pouting because of something very hurtful to him? Is he unhappy with behind the scenes legal issues? Have they finally confused him and broke his spirit with their criticism until he has checked out? I don't know - oh, but I wish I did and I wish I could fix it so Taylor could come back and show me all those things I love about him. I reviewed last night's performance and it wasn't nearly as bad as my memory contrived it, it was quite good actually! It was better than any other performance and if it had been performed by someone else, I would have been impressed. But I was missing what makes Taylor Taylor. I don't think his is physically leaving tonight…at least I hope not! I recognize he has more talent than the other eight combined, so I voted my fingers numb, but I hope he resolves his distractions and sings Queen next week like the regal performer he is.
Whispy thoughts:
I think these performers know less about country music than I do 21st century music, and they didn't convince me they knew much about that either.
I think the orchestra contributed to Taylor's Taylor-less performance by playing too loud with too many strings (it was Country Roads for heaven sakes, not Beethoven's Fifth), and I think having a fiddle in one ear and an off-key background singer didn't help. What all this added up to was Taylor, the great musician, being on key, keeping up the pace of the race, and displaying his musical abilities in the face of all that tribulation - showing he can sing like nobody's business no matter what the hurdles.
I think every performer had microphone problems, as I couldn't even understand the words to the songs I knew.
I think the four adults on the show have lost their professionalism and perhaps their minds. I know this is a television show designed to entertain. I want the two people in the world who think these four people's insanity is entertaining to e-mail me and identify yourselves.
I think in the give-and-take game of one-upmanship with a put-down that Ryan and Simon play, Simon stepped over the line with his 'desperate housewife' dig and you could see it nakedly in Terri Hatcher's guy, Ryan's, eyes.
I think Paula can't handle being boo-able.
I am so over these people who can't get over themselves.
Come back, little Taylor, come back. Go home, little Ace, go home.
How what appeared to be the best group of talent ever continues to disappoint is a mystery.
Kellie:
Not impressive vocally or personality-wise, Kellie has apparently decided to 'buy' her way into fans hearts; flying in her personal hair dresser who reportedly charged $300 for last night's do, and spending what Miles Siggins, Idol wardrobe stylist, described as 'the most ever spent by a contestant on fashion' for last night's scanty camisole. All this extravagance on the same day as an article about the sacrifices of idol's families reported that her grandpa was 'staying at a Howard Johnson hotel near the airport and friends have helped out with the cost. But he's been using taxis to ferry him the long distances around the city that gets kind of expensive.' Bearing in mind Kellie's sad soap-opera-life stories, makes you wonder, don't it? If I was one of those friends helping foot the bill, I might be a tad upset at Kellie's decision to get a little fancy. Anyway, Country theme should have been her strong night. Reba's 'Fancy' was definitely a better song choice than 'Bubbly Bucket', but the performance was the same usual lackluster offering as last week. She failed to cash in (even with all the cash out(lay) on what was her best opportunity to shine. Maybe that is all the sheen she has in her. The hair didn't look like 300 bucks either, although I admit it was hard to take your eyes off slightly below her shoulders, even for an old heterosexual lady, but that won't get my vote, tho it might get some others to phone in.
Chris:
Chris singing probably the only country song he knows, even if his entire family loves country, still looked unhappy to me. Well within his comfort zone, having reportedly sang it to his wife at their wedding, he did a decent job on the vocals. But - for the love of heaven does this guy have ANY PERSONALITY at all???? Can he smile? Who the heck are we painfully watching week after week. Is it so difficult for him to perform that he must appear to be in pain every moment on stage or is he just channeling my pain at having to watch him? I am doing my part to put him out of his misery.
Ace:
Can you say b-o-r-i-n-g? Oh, please! By the time Ace reached the part of his performance that degenerated to cat-er-wauling, I wanted to make that same sound myself because that nasal whine was like a nail being hammered into my brain by then. If there is any justice in idol voting, please let the air-headed, one-look, Romeo-wanna-be go home! There is a reason why he is still available, Ryan. I caught Ace on the rerun of Half & Half this week and can report that his acting is as vapid as his singing and to me he isn't pretty enough to be a model, though he appears to have the brains for it. Can you say, G-o-o-d-b-y-e? Lord, I hope so! Bottom of the bottom three.
Mandisa:
Singing the song that has more words than all of Kenny's together (says Mr. Rogers), Mandisa ran out of steam, breath, and vocals. The usually articulate diva did not articulate well and showed no voice versatility at all. I know this woman has a powerful voice and I always heard if you could 'really sing' you could sing anything. I am starting to believe she can't sing anything. I have to add - Mandisa has a strikingly beautiful face and smile and needs to play up her strengths. What the he$$ happened to their style adviser? Mr. Siggins must have been with Kellie for the 3-1/2 hour shopping spree that produced the red lingerie because he let Mandisa slip through the gapping hole in the wall. I myself am somewhat overweight (about 30 lbs actually) and I wouldn't be caught dead in my own back yard in that outfit Mandisa wore on national television. Has no one ever told her that big girls should wear vertical stripes and avoid those that are oriented for sunsets at all costs? Not to mention, no lovely plus size woman should ever show that much skin to that many people. And those jeans - no matter how much I shout - NEVER WEAR THOSE JEANS, they just keep turning up. Miles Siggins needs to be fired.
Bucky:
Also in his element with a Country Theme and years and years of country music to select from - Bucky picked an obscure Gary Allen tune to showcase his talent. Ask yourself this; you are among nine finalists on the biggest talent search in the US and the genre at hand is your bread-and-butter - wouldn't you take that opportunity to sing the one song you know inside out and upside down - the one you think is your personal best? No way I am believing this was it. If there were problems with song rights, you slide to your second best - I am thinking this had to be pretty far down the line. For the first time, I who talk country like nobody's business, joined the ranks of those who could not understand one word of what Bucky sang. (More on this later). Aside from all this, he did an OK job and seemed his most comfortable on stage - I thinking sitting down was a good idea, his posture indicates he has been trying to do that on every show so far. The little contrived stylized look in the camera at the end, while a cute idea, (probably stolen from Ace), but was just another distraction for Bucky, who needs to concentrate all his efforts on singing. Still, I love the guy and am not ready for him to go home just yet.
Paris:
Did Paris perform? Oh, yes, she was chilled out, simplified down, and gussied up and performed "How Can I Live Without You'. One of the better songs selected, but not necessarily for her. The consummate musician with a singing voice that rivals most lost her key in the beginning and was uninteresting once she located it. Unfortunately for these idols, this genre did its job, which it to display a hint of versatility or lack thereof, and the lack thereof won out. Maybe we will be living without Paris after tonight? I think she will be joining Ace and Katharine in the bottom three.
Elliott:
Moments of greatness, well as least 'pretty goodness', danced through Elliott's version of Garth's 'If Tomorrow Never Comes'. Unfortunately there were more of the other moments, when he stumbled into what Kenny described best about Elliott: using his singing acrobatics to impress and yet failing to entertain. May he was hoping last night that if tomorrow never comes, he wouldn’t be the one going home tonight.
Katharine:
An Elvis fan from the original days, I have never heard that truly OBSCURE mess Katharine performed - and I will be happy to never have to hear it again. The only words I retained (or understood) were the refrain about Elvis (can't actually retain the refrain at the moment) and the word hips. Another performer with a good vocal range, but absolutely not one whit of performing range, Katharine has the personality level of Chris, the voice of Paris, and the limited versatility of nearly every other contestant and all together that makes one uninteresting performer. I think she should be back in the bottom three tonight.
Taylor:
The individual who performed that horrid John Denver song (not country) did a pretty credible job on the vocals even in the face of: being drowned out by a symphony orchestra, (who should never be allowed to play country and who quieted down after Taylor's performance); being rushed by an arrangement that made it seem those country roads were 'running' him home; and being upstaged by a parody of Charlie Daniels front stage. He had a lovely smile that flashed occasionally, but I wonder where Taylor was. Emotionally he never showed up. Although I love this guy and his talent and I spend way too many of my waking moments looking at, reading about, watching, and listening to him - I know I don't know him at all. He is just a very talented, extremely charismatic young entertainer that has won me over with his southern charm, his phenomenal ability, and his unique personality. That is why I can't say what the problem is. Is he being 'trained' to lose his identity? Is he pouting because of something very hurtful to him? Is he unhappy with behind the scenes legal issues? Have they finally confused him and broke his spirit with their criticism until he has checked out? I don't know - oh, but I wish I did and I wish I could fix it so Taylor could come back and show me all those things I love about him. I reviewed last night's performance and it wasn't nearly as bad as my memory contrived it, it was quite good actually! It was better than any other performance and if it had been performed by someone else, I would have been impressed. But I was missing what makes Taylor Taylor. I don't think his is physically leaving tonight…at least I hope not! I recognize he has more talent than the other eight combined, so I voted my fingers numb, but I hope he resolves his distractions and sings Queen next week like the regal performer he is.
Whispy thoughts:
I think these performers know less about country music than I do 21st century music, and they didn't convince me they knew much about that either.
I think the orchestra contributed to Taylor's Taylor-less performance by playing too loud with too many strings (it was Country Roads for heaven sakes, not Beethoven's Fifth), and I think having a fiddle in one ear and an off-key background singer didn't help. What all this added up to was Taylor, the great musician, being on key, keeping up the pace of the race, and displaying his musical abilities in the face of all that tribulation - showing he can sing like nobody's business no matter what the hurdles.
I think every performer had microphone problems, as I couldn't even understand the words to the songs I knew.
I think the four adults on the show have lost their professionalism and perhaps their minds. I know this is a television show designed to entertain. I want the two people in the world who think these four people's insanity is entertaining to e-mail me and identify yourselves.
I think in the give-and-take game of one-upmanship with a put-down that Ryan and Simon play, Simon stepped over the line with his 'desperate housewife' dig and you could see it nakedly in Terri Hatcher's guy, Ryan's, eyes.
I think Paula can't handle being boo-able.
I am so over these people who can't get over themselves.
Come back, little Taylor, come back. Go home, little Ace, go home.