Starting over...
I havent written in this for awhile...so Lets go off with a Bang.
Im Jayme, a 19yr old girl who knows exactly what she wants. That frightens me a bit actually. My goals arnt to go to college and make loads amount of money. Its to be happy, even if that means working at a go no where job for the rest of my life.. As long as Im happy, Im good.
In the past 3 months I have made so many life changing choices. Ive made alot of mistakes and some things I wont ever admit to. Not that i regret them, i just know that they were mistakes. Im learning how to start over. I was looking at the person I was, and the one I was becomming and I didnt like it. I am who I am, and I cant change that. Im learning how to love myself, how to be a strong individual, and how to make the right choices in life.
I dont even know where to start half of the time. Especially with relationships, where do I start? First time in 4 years I have been actually single. Im not saying that I like it but im not saying that I dont. I miss being with someone, especially him, I wont lie. It makes me sad sometimes, and sometimes it makes me happy that we both can grow as individuals. If its ment to be, then it will be. I miss being comfortable with someone, to actually be in that stage of a relationship and not have to worry anymore. I really do miss that. But Im also excited to be mysefl not "Jayme and...." its just "Jayme." thats new, and exiciting for me. I lost alot of things going out of that rleationship, alot. I lost so much family, and a sister and a brother who i thought would always be mine. its okay though, Im learning. I know what I want out of a relationship, i know what I expect from myself. and If I could do it all over, I would.
But now, being single...I dont even know where to start! Its all new...again. Its all forgien.
Life likes to throw things at people. I know it will never throw anything at me that I cant handle. I know this. Everything makes me a stronger person.
I miss alot of things.
SO much.
I dont want it back though.
I know what I want, and I know to get it how hard I have to work.
Im willing.
More then willing.
Im Jayme, a 19yr old girl who knows exactly what she wants. That frightens me a bit actually. My goals arnt to go to college and make loads amount of money. Its to be happy, even if that means working at a go no where job for the rest of my life.. As long as Im happy, Im good.
In the past 3 months I have made so many life changing choices. Ive made alot of mistakes and some things I wont ever admit to. Not that i regret them, i just know that they were mistakes. Im learning how to start over. I was looking at the person I was, and the one I was becomming and I didnt like it. I am who I am, and I cant change that. Im learning how to love myself, how to be a strong individual, and how to make the right choices in life.
I dont even know where to start half of the time. Especially with relationships, where do I start? First time in 4 years I have been actually single. Im not saying that I like it but im not saying that I dont. I miss being with someone, especially him, I wont lie. It makes me sad sometimes, and sometimes it makes me happy that we both can grow as individuals. If its ment to be, then it will be. I miss being comfortable with someone, to actually be in that stage of a relationship and not have to worry anymore. I really do miss that. But Im also excited to be mysefl not "Jayme and...." its just "Jayme." thats new, and exiciting for me. I lost alot of things going out of that rleationship, alot. I lost so much family, and a sister and a brother who i thought would always be mine. its okay though, Im learning. I know what I want out of a relationship, i know what I expect from myself. and If I could do it all over, I would.
But now, being single...I dont even know where to start! Its all new...again. Its all forgien.
Life likes to throw things at people. I know it will never throw anything at me that I cant handle. I know this. Everything makes me a stronger person.
I miss alot of things.
SO much.
I dont want it back though.
I know what I want, and I know to get it how hard I have to work.
Im willing.
More then willing.