Token Thoughts
Like always this will be a blur of thoughts that expand and most likely just diffuse into other thoughts. When I write it is most likely my brain in self-cleansing mode, and I do not do this often enough. Just like I rarely see the doctor until something is out of commission.
1) Doctors. I work with them. I have greater experience with them than most people. Doctors are usually perceived as good people. They are here to heal and to correct. For the most part they do a good job, but when you work with them the perspective shifts. Verily, there is the GOD complex with some, and even the most humble and kind doctors have a pinch of superiority, but I don't blame them. Our culture worships their knowledge. And like anyone treated a certain way for a good duration, she starts to believe her word is better than others and she starts to believe she should be treated a certain way. I see a lot of struggle with this when I work with my fellows who are still on the middle of the ladder. They are in education mode, thus their word isn't golden and they're not treated with as much respect. My fellows are almost like my friends. They are actually interested in who I am and what I like. I appreciate them.
Something I've recently noticed in how our perspective of people is largely determined by our respect and our schema for a how a person should look. We associate doctors with the white lab coats, but when you see a doctor sans lab coat, he/she appears smaller and not as knowledgeable.
2) I recently attended a summer BBQ hosted by my fellows that took place at one of our older doctor's residence. His house is in Malibu, on the coast, up in the hills with the best view you could ever dream of. All of the doctors were donning normal attire. They were people for the day. I thought of my perspective of the ocean from that vantage point versus the other invited doctor's perspective. For those who don't have a place on the beach, they could probably procure one someday. Me? Highly unlikely. This of course, stained my perspective greatly. I enjoyed the view, but not as if it were my view to enjoy. I would have appreciated it more if I were hiking or driving by. Which makes me ask, why this class system thinking? Why do I feel inferior to these people? Sure, they had the money and the lack of social life to attain all the medical education needed to become a doctor, but are they truly better than me? Of course not. I'm no better than them, as I am no better than the homeless woman on Gayley Ave. But my social self says yes, they are better. Yes, I am better than the homeless. This social self seems to win our outlook on life way too often and I have been obsessing lately on a way to break from it. Thus my previous rants on living in nature and becoming more dependent on my knowledge to survive without monetary means.
3) Philosophy. I enjoy it, but it drives me nuts. It's mental masturbation at best and when I'm surrounded by people who feel they must use it as a source of connection and intellectual gauging, I feel like I'm inferior since most philosophical arguments have slipped my mind since college. I met a wonderful group of educated people a couple of weeks ago. They are the philosophical type. Their apartment was a labyrinth of books that piled high on everything you could possibly imagine. It was like being in a warm, book womb. I was silent and observant as usual, but I enjoyed their conversation despite the philosophical content. I'm hoping to become more familiar with more interesting topics to break free from silence and finally join them in conversation.
1) Doctors. I work with them. I have greater experience with them than most people. Doctors are usually perceived as good people. They are here to heal and to correct. For the most part they do a good job, but when you work with them the perspective shifts. Verily, there is the GOD complex with some, and even the most humble and kind doctors have a pinch of superiority, but I don't blame them. Our culture worships their knowledge. And like anyone treated a certain way for a good duration, she starts to believe her word is better than others and she starts to believe she should be treated a certain way. I see a lot of struggle with this when I work with my fellows who are still on the middle of the ladder. They are in education mode, thus their word isn't golden and they're not treated with as much respect. My fellows are almost like my friends. They are actually interested in who I am and what I like. I appreciate them.
Something I've recently noticed in how our perspective of people is largely determined by our respect and our schema for a how a person should look. We associate doctors with the white lab coats, but when you see a doctor sans lab coat, he/she appears smaller and not as knowledgeable.
2) I recently attended a summer BBQ hosted by my fellows that took place at one of our older doctor's residence. His house is in Malibu, on the coast, up in the hills with the best view you could ever dream of. All of the doctors were donning normal attire. They were people for the day. I thought of my perspective of the ocean from that vantage point versus the other invited doctor's perspective. For those who don't have a place on the beach, they could probably procure one someday. Me? Highly unlikely. This of course, stained my perspective greatly. I enjoyed the view, but not as if it were my view to enjoy. I would have appreciated it more if I were hiking or driving by. Which makes me ask, why this class system thinking? Why do I feel inferior to these people? Sure, they had the money and the lack of social life to attain all the medical education needed to become a doctor, but are they truly better than me? Of course not. I'm no better than them, as I am no better than the homeless woman on Gayley Ave. But my social self says yes, they are better. Yes, I am better than the homeless. This social self seems to win our outlook on life way too often and I have been obsessing lately on a way to break from it. Thus my previous rants on living in nature and becoming more dependent on my knowledge to survive without monetary means.
3) Philosophy. I enjoy it, but it drives me nuts. It's mental masturbation at best and when I'm surrounded by people who feel they must use it as a source of connection and intellectual gauging, I feel like I'm inferior since most philosophical arguments have slipped my mind since college. I met a wonderful group of educated people a couple of weeks ago. They are the philosophical type. Their apartment was a labyrinth of books that piled high on everything you could possibly imagine. It was like being in a warm, book womb. I was silent and observant as usual, but I enjoyed their conversation despite the philosophical content. I'm hoping to become more familiar with more interesting topics to break free from silence and finally join them in conversation.