(no subject)
Hey everyone, I'm just going to do a quick update before I go take a nap before the route.
I started my Wendy's job about 3 weeks ago, and so far I like it. It's definitely a lot better then Cinema World, surprisingly. I'm still kind of slow with making sandwiches, but that's mostly because I don't have all of the toppings memorized. Today was a bad day at work, though. I was on fries/nuggets and we were SLAMMED. I couldn't drop fries fast enough and when I portioned out the fries into the boxes they were BURNING hot so I kept getting burned. >.<;;;; /cry. PLUS they've scheduled me against my availability for 3 WEEKS IN A ROW so I've had to cancel my Dr.'s appt's TWICE now. >.<+!! /SIGH
Andrew's car isn't as fucked up as we had feared. Luckily it wasn't him destroying his engine. Apparently it was only his timing belt so he got that replaced and the water belt with it. It was about $400, but that's definitely better than the $1,000 that we were afraid that we were going to have to spend for a new car. >.<
Poor Andrew, though, is pretty sick right now with a bad sore throat and cough. (And right before Christmas, too!) T-T
I'm feeling kind of a little sick too. Yesterday my throat felt a little sore and my nose was getting a little stuffed. I'm going to the doctor on Wednesday and I'm really nervous since not only do I have a fear of going to the doctor, but I'm going to get a diabetes test since I'm pre-diabetic anyway and my vision's starting to get a little bit blurry at long-distances. My glasses are about 2 1/2 years old, but it's really important that I check anyway. I'm super-nervous, though, since both my mom and dad's dad had diabetes so it runs in my family. Plus, I'm scared of needles. /fail
Andrew's poor stepdad, though, Mustapha (the guy I *REALLY* don't like, not only has had to deal with his throat cancer being "cured" and coming back, but now his colon's infected and he's had to get EMERGENCY surgery today to remove it. He actually FLATLINED, but they brought him back. @-@;;; *SCARY!!*
I would feel really bad for Andrew's mom if Mustapha actually DIED b/c he's basically her world. She's all out in Naples (FL), alone, with only him since she had to move out there for her new job.
Even though I don't really like him, I don't want him to die.
Andrew and I have no plans for Christmas, which pretty much sucks since I have no friends down here that I could really hang out with, and my parents aren't in Jacksonville right now so we won't be going up to visit them. Plus, Andrew's working that night so we wouldn't be able to leave town (together) anyway.
:( I really hate not having any female friends to talk to and hang out with down here. T-T !!
If I had the money I'd SO go up and see Michi and Ruka right now. It would be AWESOME to spend some quality time with them...
And Andrew and I were talking really late last night/early this morning. I was talking about how my personality's changed since high school and how I really don't like a lot of parts of it. Such as always being more "diplomatic" and less.....blunt and brash.
I was pretty aggressive and energetic and more outgoing back then, too. Part of it was just a lot of pent-up anger and stress that came out as all of that, but part of it was just my personality back then, too. :(
Now I'm *too* diplomatic, I think. I don't really say what's on my mind any more. I don't like to cause conflict where before I faced it head-on. I feel a lot more held-back, too, and jaded. :(
I think the turning point was when I went through all that stuff with Bitchard.
Me being kicked out of the house, and losing my jobs, and my mom dying, and my car getting hit by a dumptruck, etc, etc.
I remember how one time I came home wanting to vent, and he wouldn't listen to me at all. He just totally gave me the cold shoulder and said that he was "Tired of hearing me bitch!"
I remember just breaking down in tears and saying that "I just want somebody to listen to me."
Before, people said that I could never be serious and that I talked too much.
Now people say that I'm *TOO* serious and I can never joke. And that I'm "bitter at life."
So now I don't want to be seen as someone who's always bitching so I tend to voice my feelings once and then I keep it inside. I wish I knew how to change it back to the way it was.....
I just know that I feel jaded, and almost hollow at times.
I want to say things but I can't seem to find my voice, for fear of offending someone since I'm afraid of people talking badly about me. /sigh
Time for sleep~
I started my Wendy's job about 3 weeks ago, and so far I like it. It's definitely a lot better then Cinema World, surprisingly. I'm still kind of slow with making sandwiches, but that's mostly because I don't have all of the toppings memorized. Today was a bad day at work, though. I was on fries/nuggets and we were SLAMMED. I couldn't drop fries fast enough and when I portioned out the fries into the boxes they were BURNING hot so I kept getting burned. >.<;;;; /cry. PLUS they've scheduled me against my availability for 3 WEEKS IN A ROW so I've had to cancel my Dr.'s appt's TWICE now. >.<+!! /SIGH
Andrew's car isn't as fucked up as we had feared. Luckily it wasn't him destroying his engine. Apparently it was only his timing belt so he got that replaced and the water belt with it. It was about $400, but that's definitely better than the $1,000 that we were afraid that we were going to have to spend for a new car. >.<
Poor Andrew, though, is pretty sick right now with a bad sore throat and cough. (And right before Christmas, too!) T-T
I'm feeling kind of a little sick too. Yesterday my throat felt a little sore and my nose was getting a little stuffed. I'm going to the doctor on Wednesday and I'm really nervous since not only do I have a fear of going to the doctor, but I'm going to get a diabetes test since I'm pre-diabetic anyway and my vision's starting to get a little bit blurry at long-distances. My glasses are about 2 1/2 years old, but it's really important that I check anyway. I'm super-nervous, though, since both my mom and dad's dad had diabetes so it runs in my family. Plus, I'm scared of needles. /fail
Andrew's poor stepdad, though, Mustapha (the guy I *REALLY* don't like, not only has had to deal with his throat cancer being "cured" and coming back, but now his colon's infected and he's had to get EMERGENCY surgery today to remove it. He actually FLATLINED, but they brought him back. @-@;;; *SCARY!!*
I would feel really bad for Andrew's mom if Mustapha actually DIED b/c he's basically her world. She's all out in Naples (FL), alone, with only him since she had to move out there for her new job.
Even though I don't really like him, I don't want him to die.
Andrew and I have no plans for Christmas, which pretty much sucks since I have no friends down here that I could really hang out with, and my parents aren't in Jacksonville right now so we won't be going up to visit them. Plus, Andrew's working that night so we wouldn't be able to leave town (together) anyway.
:( I really hate not having any female friends to talk to and hang out with down here. T-T !!
If I had the money I'd SO go up and see Michi and Ruka right now. It would be AWESOME to spend some quality time with them...
And Andrew and I were talking really late last night/early this morning. I was talking about how my personality's changed since high school and how I really don't like a lot of parts of it. Such as always being more "diplomatic" and less.....blunt and brash.
I was pretty aggressive and energetic and more outgoing back then, too. Part of it was just a lot of pent-up anger and stress that came out as all of that, but part of it was just my personality back then, too. :(
Now I'm *too* diplomatic, I think. I don't really say what's on my mind any more. I don't like to cause conflict where before I faced it head-on. I feel a lot more held-back, too, and jaded. :(
I think the turning point was when I went through all that stuff with Bitchard.
Me being kicked out of the house, and losing my jobs, and my mom dying, and my car getting hit by a dumptruck, etc, etc.
I remember how one time I came home wanting to vent, and he wouldn't listen to me at all. He just totally gave me the cold shoulder and said that he was "Tired of hearing me bitch!"
I remember just breaking down in tears and saying that "I just want somebody to listen to me."
Before, people said that I could never be serious and that I talked too much.
Now people say that I'm *TOO* serious and I can never joke. And that I'm "bitter at life."
So now I don't want to be seen as someone who's always bitching so I tend to voice my feelings once and then I keep it inside. I wish I knew how to change it back to the way it was.....
I just know that I feel jaded, and almost hollow at times.
I want to say things but I can't seem to find my voice, for fear of offending someone since I'm afraid of people talking badly about me. /sigh
Time for sleep~