Arrrgh
Yesterday, I had a 10 minute phone call with the women that directs the Technician Entry Level Program for the Ministry of Transportation. Last week, I found out that I didn't get the job and requested some feedback from the interview.
Some of my answers were confusing and I didn't seem prepared enough. Conclusion: Practice more.
This hurts. This really struck me hard. First of all, my plane was leaving less then 24 hours from when I found out I was going to be interviewed, and second, stuttering and broken speech has always been a problem for me, especially in high anxiety situations. I tried to practice as much as a could but I have struggling with dyslexia all my life and I happen to be one of those unfortunate people that need to put 40% more effort into things (such as speaking, listening, math, etc.) just to be up to the same operable level as other normal people.
I can't think of anything that has been more damaging to my sense of self-worth and self-esteem than to be constantly reminded that I have to work harder than everyone else.
In all honesty, nothing she said to me was unreasonable or unfair. To cope, I've been working very closely with counselors and the career-education department these last few weeks. For some reason, my writing skills have significantly exceeded my speaking abilities, which means I'll probably be really successful with my resume but will ultimately fail at the interview level. I have a lot of catching up to do.
Some of my answers were confusing and I didn't seem prepared enough. Conclusion: Practice more.
This hurts. This really struck me hard. First of all, my plane was leaving less then 24 hours from when I found out I was going to be interviewed, and second, stuttering and broken speech has always been a problem for me, especially in high anxiety situations. I tried to practice as much as a could but I have struggling with dyslexia all my life and I happen to be one of those unfortunate people that need to put 40% more effort into things (such as speaking, listening, math, etc.) just to be up to the same operable level as other normal people.
I can't think of anything that has been more damaging to my sense of self-worth and self-esteem than to be constantly reminded that I have to work harder than everyone else.
In all honesty, nothing she said to me was unreasonable or unfair. To cope, I've been working very closely with counselors and the career-education department these last few weeks. For some reason, my writing skills have significantly exceeded my speaking abilities, which means I'll probably be really successful with my resume but will ultimately fail at the interview level. I have a lot of catching up to do.