(no subject)
I haven't yet decided if i want to start my whole journal over again or just leave it. I think, maybe leave it. Just because my life a year ago and today, are two totally different lives.
Let's start with the fact that I was so upset and confused about Josh in my last post. I have only talked to him once since then. Christmas night. He called me from Kristen's phone [long story.] & i basically told him that I don't want him calling back, I hate him, and I don't wish to speak to him anymore. That boy has put me through some shit. Now looking back, my heart says I shouldv'e let him speak. But that's why your brain is smarter than your heart sometimes. Hearts just want to get hurt. I haven't heard from him since, but I sure do think about him often. And I wonder if he thinks of me. hmm, oh well. lessons learned.
Hearts do get hurt. But some get lucky enough to have another patch them up. And that's my boyfriend Scott. September 11, 2006 he asked me to be his girlfriend and I said of course. Now, I can't imagine my life without him. He knows everything about Josh and he knows he is always welcome to ask. His mother is a terrific woman with lung cancer. She won't quit smoking, but she has the biggest heart. Things are going great for her right now. Scott puts up with a lot though. I find it hard sometimes to be his rock. He has had to go through things just so far in his life that I can only imagine. I did quit smoking for him. It would break my heart to know I was hurting him like that. Man do I crave that smoke every now and then though. Anyhow, I do believe that he is the one for me. We have plans. <3
Kristen and I are trying to pull our friendship together. Growing up is tough on me and I seem to make things complicated. But hey, that's me and I know she still loves me. We haven't seen much of each other in the past year. What with both of our boyfriends and jobs and her having classes. It's really hard. She is still my best friend and I can go to her with anything. I can't just forget about her, she was a huge part of my life and I owe her the world. We might be going to the beach on friday, depending on the weather. I really do miss us. And I want that again. It's possibly my biggest want in life right now.
Two days after my last post I got hired at Meijer on 26 and van dyke as a cashier. For the most part I love my job. Maybe not so much my job, but the people I work with. Meijer people are just plain awesome. The manager who hired me in, Vikkie, is my favorite. Lisa is the head manager. Sandy is another manager, one who is okay sometimes. lol But she's sadly leaving us to go to the new Meijer that is opening to be a night manager for service. Then there's Ginnie, she's a bitch. end of story. She's the new manager and she doens't know what she's doing and no one likes her. but we deal with it. Joshua, my buddy, my baby, got promoted to manager, and he is now in receiving. sad sad. but it's still technically our dept. so i still get to see him ever so often. I love that boy so much, i seriously cried the other day when he told me he had to leave us and start in recieving. And Dana. oh boy Dana. I love this girl to death, she is the most fun. It will always be a good day if Dana is working with me. She brightens up my day. After being at Mejier for almost 10 months, I got promoted to service coordiator. I am in charge of the front of the store. Just some days. It's really exhuasting but people say I'm doing well which really pleases me. And it's not so bad. I really do like working at Meijer. We have such a great time. Yes, some days absolutely suck but hey. I love it anyways.
That's pretty much my life. I work all the time. And I love my boyfriend. I tried to work at an ice cram place for a while for one of my dads friends. But having two jobs and trying to thread together a life was not working for me. I still talk and hang our with Antoinette. Not as often as I would like/should but we're both on seperate schedules all the time. She will always be my Netty. Same with Alex. Family life is better. My parents are great and I get along great with my mom more often than not. Things are really looking up. I'm not worried about college right now. I really don't wanna go. I wanna have kids is what I wanna do. Not now of course. But I would love to be a stay at home mom. Especially if plans work out and Scott and I get married.
I really enjoy my life right now. I know it could be better, but I know even more that it could be worse. I live one day at a time and hope for the best. I can't dwell on the past too long because I have a hard time coming out of it. That's what Kristen is for. lol
Well I think that's about it. I should really get some sleep now. Its 2AM.
Let's start with the fact that I was so upset and confused about Josh in my last post. I have only talked to him once since then. Christmas night. He called me from Kristen's phone [long story.] & i basically told him that I don't want him calling back, I hate him, and I don't wish to speak to him anymore. That boy has put me through some shit. Now looking back, my heart says I shouldv'e let him speak. But that's why your brain is smarter than your heart sometimes. Hearts just want to get hurt. I haven't heard from him since, but I sure do think about him often. And I wonder if he thinks of me. hmm, oh well. lessons learned.
Hearts do get hurt. But some get lucky enough to have another patch them up. And that's my boyfriend Scott. September 11, 2006 he asked me to be his girlfriend and I said of course. Now, I can't imagine my life without him. He knows everything about Josh and he knows he is always welcome to ask. His mother is a terrific woman with lung cancer. She won't quit smoking, but she has the biggest heart. Things are going great for her right now. Scott puts up with a lot though. I find it hard sometimes to be his rock. He has had to go through things just so far in his life that I can only imagine. I did quit smoking for him. It would break my heart to know I was hurting him like that. Man do I crave that smoke every now and then though. Anyhow, I do believe that he is the one for me. We have plans. <3
Kristen and I are trying to pull our friendship together. Growing up is tough on me and I seem to make things complicated. But hey, that's me and I know she still loves me. We haven't seen much of each other in the past year. What with both of our boyfriends and jobs and her having classes. It's really hard. She is still my best friend and I can go to her with anything. I can't just forget about her, she was a huge part of my life and I owe her the world. We might be going to the beach on friday, depending on the weather. I really do miss us. And I want that again. It's possibly my biggest want in life right now.
Two days after my last post I got hired at Meijer on 26 and van dyke as a cashier. For the most part I love my job. Maybe not so much my job, but the people I work with. Meijer people are just plain awesome. The manager who hired me in, Vikkie, is my favorite. Lisa is the head manager. Sandy is another manager, one who is okay sometimes. lol But she's sadly leaving us to go to the new Meijer that is opening to be a night manager for service. Then there's Ginnie, she's a bitch. end of story. She's the new manager and she doens't know what she's doing and no one likes her. but we deal with it. Joshua, my buddy, my baby, got promoted to manager, and he is now in receiving. sad sad. but it's still technically our dept. so i still get to see him ever so often. I love that boy so much, i seriously cried the other day when he told me he had to leave us and start in recieving. And Dana. oh boy Dana. I love this girl to death, she is the most fun. It will always be a good day if Dana is working with me. She brightens up my day. After being at Mejier for almost 10 months, I got promoted to service coordiator. I am in charge of the front of the store. Just some days. It's really exhuasting but people say I'm doing well which really pleases me. And it's not so bad. I really do like working at Meijer. We have such a great time. Yes, some days absolutely suck but hey. I love it anyways.
That's pretty much my life. I work all the time. And I love my boyfriend. I tried to work at an ice cram place for a while for one of my dads friends. But having two jobs and trying to thread together a life was not working for me. I still talk and hang our with Antoinette. Not as often as I would like/should but we're both on seperate schedules all the time. She will always be my Netty. Same with Alex. Family life is better. My parents are great and I get along great with my mom more often than not. Things are really looking up. I'm not worried about college right now. I really don't wanna go. I wanna have kids is what I wanna do. Not now of course. But I would love to be a stay at home mom. Especially if plans work out and Scott and I get married.
I really enjoy my life right now. I know it could be better, but I know even more that it could be worse. I live one day at a time and hope for the best. I can't dwell on the past too long because I have a hard time coming out of it. That's what Kristen is for. lol
Well I think that's about it. I should really get some sleep now. Its 2AM.