the rebirth of blogging?
Here I am, back again. After a long time of eschewing blogging, I have returned. I find it easier to type as fast as the thoughts write through my head. Even though there's definitely something special about handwritten journals that I will always appreciate, I like being able to type out my thoughts when I'm too tired or lazy to take the time to write by hand. What kind of generation do I live in with that mindset? The generation of instant gratification, and lack of patience, unfortunately. I accept it though and I'm willing to work with it. We all do what we can within the cultural context we live in.
So here I am, all grown up. Legally speaking, anyway. My head still doesn't feel like it's screwed on quite right; I still have a few things to learn about being independent and making all my own decisions. I still mess up, but I'm slowly headed towards a good path (I won't say the 'right' path, because there is no 'right' path). I've started my senior year of college. I've changed my major to psychology despite attempts from my parents to guide me towards business. I decided that I cannot have a job with arbitrary meaning; at least with psychology I can learn about how the world works through our minds' perspectives... it's pretty interesting stuff. I've become so enthralled with psychology that today on the drive back from Mel's I listened to a podcast on my iPhone about anxiety disorders instead of music. And I kept it on for the entire hour! The day I thought I'd listen to someone speaking with a monotone voice instead of music is the day I thought I'd be retired from work at age 65 or something.
I also have become a slight homebody. After my unfortunate situation abroad (of which I cannot reference to online unfortunately), I have absolutely no desire to go out and get shit faced like most other college kids seem to do. I feel left out of my sorority, which I'm now dropping actually. But the reason I feel left out is because I don't go out and meet people and get drunk at bars with all the frats. It was okay first semester junior year even, to an extent. But this year I'd rather stay in with Mel and Wendy and watch a movie, make popcorn, and play a game of scrabble. Yes, maybe I am finally ready to be a 'boring adult'. My time has come. I just find waking up each day after a restful night's sleep, less drama and social anxiety, better grades, and more time for me to learn about the world actually makes me happy. It's great.
Tonight I celebrated Rosh Hashanah with Mel's family. It's the Jewish new year. I tried gifiltafish (spelling?), chopped liver, kasha, and matza ball soup. I couldn't handle the gifiltafish or chopped liver, but the soup and kasha were good. We also had this yummy bread called Challah with raisins or chocolate in it. It feels nice to have a homecooked meal and be with a family for the holidays. Speaking of, I need to call Gram back!!! She called the other day and I completely forgot. What a horrible granddaughter I am. I really need to be better. I'll regret it if I don't.
I skipped Chemistry class earlier today. I had homework due in it, but I was so stressed that I slept instead. He drops one homework so its fine, I just feel silly that he has to drop my first one. Oh well. I was stressed after spanish class when the teacher held me back and asked me if I understood Spanish. I'm the dumbass senior in that class with a bunch of freshmen. I have to take it to graduate, but it is harder for me since I haven't taken spanish in 3 years and they've all taken it straight out of high school. I have forgotten a lot of vocabulary and forget to use other tenses in my speaking. It's kind of embarrassing I feel like the freshman all think I'm dumb. But I guess I can't reflect on or be bothered by what they think- it's not important in the long run anyway what other people's perceptions of you are... especially if they're false ones.
I did forget to finish my homework in spanish though that was due at midnight. For that I can be called dumb. Sacre Bleu! Oh well.
Hasta Luego (see I do remember some stuff... ha ha ha)
Katy
So here I am, all grown up. Legally speaking, anyway. My head still doesn't feel like it's screwed on quite right; I still have a few things to learn about being independent and making all my own decisions. I still mess up, but I'm slowly headed towards a good path (I won't say the 'right' path, because there is no 'right' path). I've started my senior year of college. I've changed my major to psychology despite attempts from my parents to guide me towards business. I decided that I cannot have a job with arbitrary meaning; at least with psychology I can learn about how the world works through our minds' perspectives... it's pretty interesting stuff. I've become so enthralled with psychology that today on the drive back from Mel's I listened to a podcast on my iPhone about anxiety disorders instead of music. And I kept it on for the entire hour! The day I thought I'd listen to someone speaking with a monotone voice instead of music is the day I thought I'd be retired from work at age 65 or something.
I also have become a slight homebody. After my unfortunate situation abroad (of which I cannot reference to online unfortunately), I have absolutely no desire to go out and get shit faced like most other college kids seem to do. I feel left out of my sorority, which I'm now dropping actually. But the reason I feel left out is because I don't go out and meet people and get drunk at bars with all the frats. It was okay first semester junior year even, to an extent. But this year I'd rather stay in with Mel and Wendy and watch a movie, make popcorn, and play a game of scrabble. Yes, maybe I am finally ready to be a 'boring adult'. My time has come. I just find waking up each day after a restful night's sleep, less drama and social anxiety, better grades, and more time for me to learn about the world actually makes me happy. It's great.
Tonight I celebrated Rosh Hashanah with Mel's family. It's the Jewish new year. I tried gifiltafish (spelling?), chopped liver, kasha, and matza ball soup. I couldn't handle the gifiltafish or chopped liver, but the soup and kasha were good. We also had this yummy bread called Challah with raisins or chocolate in it. It feels nice to have a homecooked meal and be with a family for the holidays. Speaking of, I need to call Gram back!!! She called the other day and I completely forgot. What a horrible granddaughter I am. I really need to be better. I'll regret it if I don't.
I skipped Chemistry class earlier today. I had homework due in it, but I was so stressed that I slept instead. He drops one homework so its fine, I just feel silly that he has to drop my first one. Oh well. I was stressed after spanish class when the teacher held me back and asked me if I understood Spanish. I'm the dumbass senior in that class with a bunch of freshmen. I have to take it to graduate, but it is harder for me since I haven't taken spanish in 3 years and they've all taken it straight out of high school. I have forgotten a lot of vocabulary and forget to use other tenses in my speaking. It's kind of embarrassing I feel like the freshman all think I'm dumb. But I guess I can't reflect on or be bothered by what they think- it's not important in the long run anyway what other people's perceptions of you are... especially if they're false ones.
I did forget to finish my homework in spanish though that was due at midnight. For that I can be called dumb. Sacre Bleu! Oh well.
Hasta Luego (see I do remember some stuff... ha ha ha)
Katy