Me - Day 1
I could sit here and think of at least a dozen things I don't like about this picture. My eyes look a bit puffy. My pores look enormous. I could go on and on. But, I'm not going to. This is what I really look like sans makeup. This is so me, it's a little scary.
I have a confession to make. I took my ten photos and then threw all them into the computer recycling bin. Not a single one of them was me. Not one. I was too worried about the camera angles and lighting and what my expression was like. They were not me at all. My eyes were completely blank. I was not there. So, I trashed them and started again. But because I was so emotional about it, I could only bare to take two more photos before I burst into tears. It made me feel lame and ridiculous and stupid. I was crying because I was taking my own picture. Absurd.
But, painful or not, I took two more photos and chose the first one. It's the most real. And raw. And me. I almost feel like you can see the inside of me from here. You can see the plea in my eyes... the plea of "Please like me even though I'm plain looking and miles from perfect." You see that, don't you?
So, there you go. Project Face Your Fears is in full effect. It made me cry. It was hard. I hated every minute of it. But, hopefully tomorrow will be easier.