Huh?
I think my family has officially moved to Cracktown. Either that, or we've all been cursed.
Sunday, June 4th: My parents' neighbors dug a trench in my parents' yard for a large drain hose for their side gutter. The neighbors think everything surrounding their house is their property, even when it is clearly not. Case in point--they planted a tree in the side yard they share with my parents. This is a semi-narrow strip of land between the two houses. The parents would have no problem with the tree, except for the fact that the neighbors planted it on the parents' side of the divide. But, the parents haven't said anything for the 5 years* it's been growing there. Now, however, the trench was evidently going too far.
The neighbors were bitching about water in their basement, so they want to reroute their drain spout to the street. They would like to do by placing the drain hose in the parents' front yard. My dad went over to ask them about the hose, which sparked a neighborly conversation, during which the parents' house was compared to a trailer park and a toxic waste dump.
Granted, it's not the best looking house on the block, and my family's the first to admit it. But, neighbor lady, don't take on the laziest and stubbornest people in town. Think it's ugly now? Just wait for the flock of pink, plastic flamingos to grace the lawn, and 80's Christmas lights brightening up the back deck. Now we'll make it look bad on purpose.
Monday, June 5th: I get a call at work that ishie has a migraine and needs a ride home. I run to the rescue--I drove on the highway!**--to pick her up. We're less than a mile away from her work when my car dies...at one of the busiest intersections in town. Nearly an hour later, the tow truck arrived to tow us one whole block to the closest body shop. Turns out the fuel pump conked out on me, and with splendid timing! Now I can look forward to juggling cars with the fam for a few days, trying to get everyone to work.
Wednesday, June 7th: My car's fuel pump, etc., has been fixed! Only problem is the bill - $1200. After I signed this year's paychecks away, I finally got my car back and went home. This should be the end of the week from hell, right?
Wrong! Thursday, June 8th: Someone broke into ishie's car. Again. I think this is the fourth time in three years? Of course, that's not counting the two garage break-ins. Is it because she's not a customer of the local drug house? Maybe because she dresses like a bum on a good day? That *must* mean she's got money stashed away in her car!
And just to top it all off -- Monday, June 12th: My dad got a bunch of calls from one of his tenants. During the wee hours of the morning, a kid stole a car (oddly enough, the car didn't belong to us!) and crashed it into my dad's rental house. Yes, the young deliquent drove the car INTO the house. Luckily, no one was injured and the house is being repaired. But, seriously, what the hell?? I'm almost afraid to ask 'What's next?'
*Time is a really hard concept for my family. We usually have no idea how long something lasts, or how old a person is. It's generally a really bad guess on our parts.
**I avoid the highway at all costs. It's okay, except for the getting on and getting off the highway part...
Sunday, June 4th: My parents' neighbors dug a trench in my parents' yard for a large drain hose for their side gutter. The neighbors think everything surrounding their house is their property, even when it is clearly not. Case in point--they planted a tree in the side yard they share with my parents. This is a semi-narrow strip of land between the two houses. The parents would have no problem with the tree, except for the fact that the neighbors planted it on the parents' side of the divide. But, the parents haven't said anything for the 5 years* it's been growing there. Now, however, the trench was evidently going too far.
The neighbors were bitching about water in their basement, so they want to reroute their drain spout to the street. They would like to do by placing the drain hose in the parents' front yard. My dad went over to ask them about the hose, which sparked a neighborly conversation, during which the parents' house was compared to a trailer park and a toxic waste dump.
Granted, it's not the best looking house on the block, and my family's the first to admit it. But, neighbor lady, don't take on the laziest and stubbornest people in town. Think it's ugly now? Just wait for the flock of pink, plastic flamingos to grace the lawn, and 80's Christmas lights brightening up the back deck. Now we'll make it look bad on purpose.
Monday, June 5th: I get a call at work that ishie has a migraine and needs a ride home. I run to the rescue--I drove on the highway!**--to pick her up. We're less than a mile away from her work when my car dies...at one of the busiest intersections in town. Nearly an hour later, the tow truck arrived to tow us one whole block to the closest body shop. Turns out the fuel pump conked out on me, and with splendid timing! Now I can look forward to juggling cars with the fam for a few days, trying to get everyone to work.
Wednesday, June 7th: My car's fuel pump, etc., has been fixed! Only problem is the bill - $1200. After I signed this year's paychecks away, I finally got my car back and went home. This should be the end of the week from hell, right?
Wrong! Thursday, June 8th: Someone broke into ishie's car. Again. I think this is the fourth time in three years? Of course, that's not counting the two garage break-ins. Is it because she's not a customer of the local drug house? Maybe because she dresses like a bum on a good day? That *must* mean she's got money stashed away in her car!
And just to top it all off -- Monday, June 12th: My dad got a bunch of calls from one of his tenants. During the wee hours of the morning, a kid stole a car (oddly enough, the car didn't belong to us!) and crashed it into my dad's rental house. Yes, the young deliquent drove the car INTO the house. Luckily, no one was injured and the house is being repaired. But, seriously, what the hell?? I'm almost afraid to ask 'What's next?'
*Time is a really hard concept for my family. We usually have no idea how long something lasts, or how old a person is. It's generally a really bad guess on our parts.
**I avoid the highway at all costs. It's okay, except for the getting on and getting off the highway part...