oh hey look a fakenews fic
Pairing: Jon/'Stephen' friendship or very light slash
Rating: idk, PG
Author: Me!
Warnings: whiney 'stephen'
"Jon!" Stephen yelled "Jon! Call an ambulance!"
Jon jumped up from where he was working at his desk,and rushed to his door, knocking over folders and papers in the process. He threw his door open and sped down the hallway towards the noise, while also trying to locate his phone in the mess that was his jacket pocket.
He screeched to a halt in the lobby, his fingers on his phone, prepared to dial 911, when he saw Stephen.
He gave the man a once-over,but saw no blood. In fact, he saw nothing that would require medical intention of any kind. the only thing he saw was a grown man crying in the middle of a workplace.
Jon pinched the bridge of his nose and tried to stay calm. 10...9...8
"Stephen"
"yeah?" the dark haired man replied, the epitome of despair.
Jon looked up at him. "Did you break anything?"
"No" the man moaned
"are you bleeding?"
"no!"
"did you burn, sprain, snap or dislocate any part of you in any way?"
Stephen gave his best sad face and shook his head. Jon tried to stop himself from yelling, but found it difficult considering how his friend came in at least twice a week screaming and yelling about fictional injuries. He was sure the man would give him a heart attack one of these days.
hopefully sooner rather than later.
Jon forced himself to be calm and gently asked "where,exactly, are you hurt"?
Stephen wibbled a bit and stuck his right index finger out. Jon looked. Nothing.
He glanced up at Stephen to see if he was joking. The dark haired man just sobbed.
Jon grabbed Stephens hand and pulled it closer to himself.
still nothing.
He leaned in so his nose was practically touching Stephens palm. Finally, he saw it: A microscopic papercut, on the tip of his finger. Jon glared at the cut, as if it were its fault he had been pulled away from his work.
"well?" Stephen whined "do you think it will leave a disfiguring scar?"
Jon looked up from the cut and at Stephen. "Well theres always plastic surgery." He began pulling his insufferable friend towards the elevator "Come on, I have bandages in my office."