Five Stories Falling
Alright. So. It's been awhile. Again. And I'm sorry. But I'm here now, ready to write.
Andrew went to Detroit for Warped Tour on Sunday. I didn't go. He asked me if I wanted to. I said I didn't have the money. My Chemical Romance was there. Andrew said it was so fucking awesome. Made me really mad that I didn't go.
Today was good at least. After the beach with Megan, Josh and Farnes, we went over to Subway for some dinner and then we took Josh and Farnes back to their apartment. Then I got dressed and drove out to Alanson to pick up Jourdan. I hadn't seen her in ages and was very excited to see her. We talked so much!!! We drove out to Amber's to see her, but she wasn't home. Then we drove back into town and I stopped by Andrew's house. Randy and Alyssa were there so we talked to them for a bit until Andrew got back from work. It was so good to see him!!! Before tonight I hadn't seen him in about two weeks. And he's my big brother, so it sucked! :-) He noticed my hair cut! My own realy brother didn't notice it *rolls eyes* Andrew said, "It's bad ass. You look beautiful." Well, thank you! :-) (Yes, I got my hair cut. I have slight bangs off to the side and my hair is no around shoulder length. Guess where I got it cut and how much I paid for it... go on, just guess! Come on, guess!!! ......... I cut it myself and I paid jack shit for it! :-) And it looks pretty good, thank you very much :-) But then when Jourdan and I were leaving he decided he'd come with me to take Jourdan back home, and, of course, called shotgun :-)
I took Jourdan by Josh's so she could see Megan. We talked for a bit. Because of the whole thing between Andrew and Megan, he decided to get out of my car and just walk for a bit and I told him I'd pick him up on the corner of Kalamazoo after we were done. Jourdan and I talked a bit on how bad we feel for Andrew. I love Megan, and I know she's really happy, and I know Andrew told her that he didn't want a relationship and he never wanted to talk to her and what the fuck ever, but still.... there's a reason he has such trouble committing to relationships with girls.... his whole past. Of course he has trouble. Who wouldn't in that situation!? But when we got to Kalamazoo St., he was sitting on the corner and Jourdan yelled out the window, "Hey sexy, want a ride?" That made him laugh :-) We talked about tattooes and piercings the whole ride to Jourdan's.
Andrew and I talked quite a bit on the ride home. When I asked about Dannon, he told me he hasn't talked to him since he moved back into Tim's. Apparently Dannon hates him now, or something like that. And he has no idea why. Tim and Johnny don't like him anymore either. I don't understand. What Andrew needs is more people who love him, not people who don't like him! It makes me really mad. So I just reminded him that I love him and I'll always be there for him to pick on ;-)
We stopped at Taco Bell on the way back to his house. Jessica was there, as always, and told him that she'd tell him the total for his food when we drove up to the drive-through window. And what do you think the amount was when we pulled up? $0.42 :-) Jessica is pretty awesome. It was great.
When we got back to his house, Chrystianna, Tracey, Gary and Forest were all in the living room hanging out. Randy and Forest have now moved in with Andrew to help with rent and everything since Dannon moved out. Chrystianna is moving in also next week. Andrew's excited because now all they'll have to pay for rent is $175 each. And honestly, it'll be great to have Chrystianna living with them because a). she's a pretty cool person and she's nice and such b). she'll make sure they keep the place clean and have enough food for themselves and c). she'll make sure they keep the place clean and have food! :-) She said she'll call me and I'll help her clean up and organize the place. Besides, earlier in the year I promised Andrew and Dannon that when they got their place, I would come once a week and clean their house and I stand to it! So now I'll just come at least once a week and help Chrystianna clean up after those three guys :-)
I think that's about it for now. I'm tired. I've been tired a lot lately.
Food? Eating? Health? Don't even talk to me about that. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm sinking into this rut where I just don't give a fuck, and I just don't want to do anything and I just want to sleep all the time because I'm so tired... but at the same time I just want to do everything and get everything done and go for runs and be the girl everyone wishes I was... or thinks I am... or something.... It's a never ending cycle.
I watched the Karen Carpenter Story yesterday morning with my dad. He cried at the end. I kept shooting glances at him out of the corner of my eye. I don't know if he knew that I knew he was crying... odd sentence right there, let me tell you..... But I think it's not the greatest thing when the whole time I was watching that movie I was thinking.... "I just wish I looked like her... why can't I be that skinny?"
Is it worth it, can you even hear me?
.: Julie Bean :.
Andrew went to Detroit for Warped Tour on Sunday. I didn't go. He asked me if I wanted to. I said I didn't have the money. My Chemical Romance was there. Andrew said it was so fucking awesome. Made me really mad that I didn't go.
Today was good at least. After the beach with Megan, Josh and Farnes, we went over to Subway for some dinner and then we took Josh and Farnes back to their apartment. Then I got dressed and drove out to Alanson to pick up Jourdan. I hadn't seen her in ages and was very excited to see her. We talked so much!!! We drove out to Amber's to see her, but she wasn't home. Then we drove back into town and I stopped by Andrew's house. Randy and Alyssa were there so we talked to them for a bit until Andrew got back from work. It was so good to see him!!! Before tonight I hadn't seen him in about two weeks. And he's my big brother, so it sucked! :-) He noticed my hair cut! My own realy brother didn't notice it *rolls eyes* Andrew said, "It's bad ass. You look beautiful." Well, thank you! :-) (Yes, I got my hair cut. I have slight bangs off to the side and my hair is no around shoulder length. Guess where I got it cut and how much I paid for it... go on, just guess! Come on, guess!!! ......... I cut it myself and I paid jack shit for it! :-) And it looks pretty good, thank you very much :-) But then when Jourdan and I were leaving he decided he'd come with me to take Jourdan back home, and, of course, called shotgun :-)
I took Jourdan by Josh's so she could see Megan. We talked for a bit. Because of the whole thing between Andrew and Megan, he decided to get out of my car and just walk for a bit and I told him I'd pick him up on the corner of Kalamazoo after we were done. Jourdan and I talked a bit on how bad we feel for Andrew. I love Megan, and I know she's really happy, and I know Andrew told her that he didn't want a relationship and he never wanted to talk to her and what the fuck ever, but still.... there's a reason he has such trouble committing to relationships with girls.... his whole past. Of course he has trouble. Who wouldn't in that situation!? But when we got to Kalamazoo St., he was sitting on the corner and Jourdan yelled out the window, "Hey sexy, want a ride?" That made him laugh :-) We talked about tattooes and piercings the whole ride to Jourdan's.
Andrew and I talked quite a bit on the ride home. When I asked about Dannon, he told me he hasn't talked to him since he moved back into Tim's. Apparently Dannon hates him now, or something like that. And he has no idea why. Tim and Johnny don't like him anymore either. I don't understand. What Andrew needs is more people who love him, not people who don't like him! It makes me really mad. So I just reminded him that I love him and I'll always be there for him to pick on ;-)
We stopped at Taco Bell on the way back to his house. Jessica was there, as always, and told him that she'd tell him the total for his food when we drove up to the drive-through window. And what do you think the amount was when we pulled up? $0.42 :-) Jessica is pretty awesome. It was great.
When we got back to his house, Chrystianna, Tracey, Gary and Forest were all in the living room hanging out. Randy and Forest have now moved in with Andrew to help with rent and everything since Dannon moved out. Chrystianna is moving in also next week. Andrew's excited because now all they'll have to pay for rent is $175 each. And honestly, it'll be great to have Chrystianna living with them because a). she's a pretty cool person and she's nice and such b). she'll make sure they keep the place clean and have enough food for themselves and c). she'll make sure they keep the place clean and have food! :-) She said she'll call me and I'll help her clean up and organize the place. Besides, earlier in the year I promised Andrew and Dannon that when they got their place, I would come once a week and clean their house and I stand to it! So now I'll just come at least once a week and help Chrystianna clean up after those three guys :-)
I think that's about it for now. I'm tired. I've been tired a lot lately.
Food? Eating? Health? Don't even talk to me about that. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm sinking into this rut where I just don't give a fuck, and I just don't want to do anything and I just want to sleep all the time because I'm so tired... but at the same time I just want to do everything and get everything done and go for runs and be the girl everyone wishes I was... or thinks I am... or something.... It's a never ending cycle.
I watched the Karen Carpenter Story yesterday morning with my dad. He cried at the end. I kept shooting glances at him out of the corner of my eye. I don't know if he knew that I knew he was crying... odd sentence right there, let me tell you..... But I think it's not the greatest thing when the whole time I was watching that movie I was thinking.... "I just wish I looked like her... why can't I be that skinny?"
Is it worth it, can you even hear me?
.: Julie Bean :.