(no subject)

[juicyorange06]

Yeah, so I get home yesterday and suddenly, the urge to inhale food over surges me. So, I go to the kitchen, seeking to end this pain called "hunger" when I see some alphabet soup. Not one to think twice about things, I grabbed it and started cooking it. As I sat there...waiting for the damn soup to stop being lazy and cook itself, I thought to myself "What the FUCK is up with the GOD DAMN LETTERS IN THIS BITCH?" Well, think about it. Who the fuck sets there and actually makes words out of the letters in alphabet soup? The French? Well, there fucking French and therefore, they are automatically gay for that. I know sane people don't do that. The more I thought about it, the angrier I grew...when I stirred my soup, and yelled at the food for being lazy, I noticed words starting to form. It appeared that the soup had somehow "magically" spelled "cock" and "dick" on letters stuck to the side of the pot. I became infuriated over how such a lazy thing such as food could muster up the nerve to call me those insulting words. So, I made the soup suffer for its unspeakable sins. First I added not one, but TWO cans of water to the bitch...I'll drowned those fucking letters before they EVER think about calling me a cock. Then, after the water started over flowing from added so much water, I throw the shit in the sink and washed it down the garbage disposal. Meanwhile, while doing this good deed for mankind, a man that was working on my house over heard my profuse vulgar language and asked if everything was ok. Is everything OK? IS EVERYTHING OK YOU SAY? Yeah, everything is FUCKING DANDY. I have alphabet soup calling me a cock and a dick and now I have had to punish it for doing that AND being lazy which has caused me to waste even more energy and meanwhile, I have no FUCKING FOOD. FUCK YEAH! EVERYTHING IS FUCK-TASTIC.(Nah, i really didn't say it, but i sure as hell thought about it!) I killed that son-of-a-bitch...at least in my mind. He was French by the way.

Nah im just kidding about the whole French thing, French pple. are kinda cool .... SOmetimes