"Opps"
So I lost my job. I only worked for 2 days. Got $90 and need to look for a new job. Hope it doesn't take long. :/
I chose to stay home and argue with my boyfriend.
Then it turned out my job prob wouldn't have kept me on anyways. Oh well.
And then my bf and I went through a rough patch. It was dreadful. I was acting silly.
Forgive me if this sounds vague.
But I definitely got what I was looking for.
One of the biggest "Opps" moments I've ever had.
I let myself get so paranoid. I let everything everyone was telling me get to me. It wiggled itself into my brain and pestered me til I cracked. And we ended up arguing, resolving some things, arguing and breaking up or taking a break rather. A whole lonely week. And at the end of that week, I got scared. I was more scared than ever in my existence of being scared, but only I knew it. I took a walk in the rain. It felt nice. I cried in the rain in the middle of the night. I wanted to drown. I didn't seem fit to deserve life. But I snapped out of it and returned to my Master.
And the worst part wasn't the confusion or hurt I felt, it was the fact that I hurt the most important person to me in the process.
I'm sorry dear.
Forgive me.
I love you.
I think everything that happened could have been prevented, but I also think it was something I had to do. I sought answers, and I got them. And I believe I have grown up along with my decision.
You DJ, it was never anyone else.
-JML
I chose to stay home and argue with my boyfriend.
Then it turned out my job prob wouldn't have kept me on anyways. Oh well.
And then my bf and I went through a rough patch. It was dreadful. I was acting silly.
Forgive me if this sounds vague.
But I definitely got what I was looking for.
One of the biggest "Opps" moments I've ever had.
I let myself get so paranoid. I let everything everyone was telling me get to me. It wiggled itself into my brain and pestered me til I cracked. And we ended up arguing, resolving some things, arguing and breaking up or taking a break rather. A whole lonely week. And at the end of that week, I got scared. I was more scared than ever in my existence of being scared, but only I knew it. I took a walk in the rain. It felt nice. I cried in the rain in the middle of the night. I wanted to drown. I didn't seem fit to deserve life. But I snapped out of it and returned to my Master.
And the worst part wasn't the confusion or hurt I felt, it was the fact that I hurt the most important person to me in the process.
I'm sorry dear.
Forgive me.
I love you.
I think everything that happened could have been prevented, but I also think it was something I had to do. I sought answers, and I got them. And I believe I have grown up along with my decision.
You DJ, it was never anyone else.
-JML