Oct 07, 2010 21:32
I've been writing a little, but they've all been private.
Long story short, something happened which solidified Alex and me breaking up.
I think.
I mean. It just happened last Thursday. The sequence of events was:
-he broke up with me, yelling and screaming and cussing me out.
-i was begging/sobbing for him back.
-then he was upset too.
-then we tried to talk about things and ended up doing it.
-then we texted and talked back and forth.
-then i decided that if we're gonna do this we need to commit and really not talk/text/see each other.
so that's where we are now.
not that i have a lot of experience or anything, but i think cutting off all contact is like ripping off a band-aid. you just have to commit if not it will take forever. i honestly thought we should have been over months ago and this last time was just a sign.
i don't know if i'm trying to convince me or him of what i just wrote.
but i really don't feel like things can be mended back to a really good relationship so i just think we need to stop prolonging the (what i feel like is) inevitable. Plus, it's probably gonna take quite some time to get over us so might as well start now, right? :-/
It's been okay. Fortunately I have my student teaching to focus on. The kids are seriously so great. I could teach all day and not think about anything else because they take so much energy. There is nothing that matches the seemingly millions of hugs i get from little ones. and their snot nosed selves ahaha. I'm feeling better even just writing about them.
I only have one more week at the elementary school then it's to middle school where almost everyone is taller than me haha.