Here, Get To Know Me
I have come to realize that I am a very angry person. But it's not that I am angry in general, but I am angry at two things, well two people. Scratch that, make it three people. I am angry at my father, my mother and my step-mother. I've also come to realize that I am not a very nice person. On the outside I seem like a nice person. On the inside though, I am a ball of anger and bitterness. I tend to lash out in anger at the people closest to me. In reality, I anger very easily. I'm just very good at not letting it show. I let my anger fester inside of me until something triggers me and I explode. I am now going to tell you why I am angry at these three people.
I am angry at my mother because for as long as I can remember, she has always treated me like shit. She has abused me from the time I was younger until now. I specifically remember a time when she got angry with me and began to spank me with her hand. Once her hand began to hurt, she switched to using a flip-flop. That was quite some years ago, but I remember it as if it were yesterday. There was another time when I was sitting in my room playing my Playstation. My mom walked into my room and began to yell at me because apparently my room wasn't clean. She then took my controller from me, held it over her head and nearly threw it at me. Now that I have grown older, I've grown used to her angry outbursts. I have some very deep-rooted anger and hatred towards her.
I'm angry at my father because not once did he try to save me from my mother's abuse. Each time she would hit me, he'd just look the other way and pretend it never happened. He then divorced my mom (For which I am not angry) and re-married my step-mom. I was fine with that until my step-mom would start provoking me to anger and then getting my dad on her side. The final straw came when she and I had a huge fight and told my dad that he had to choose between me and her (I will ALWAYS hate her for that, but more on that later). You wanna know what he did? He chose her over me and kicked me out of the house. (I was living with him and my step-mom at the time). Do you have any idea how much that hurt? After he kicked me out, he never had time to do anything with me and always saying that he was too busy. So, that's why I am angry with my father.
I'm angry at my step-mother because of one of the things she did. She would always provoke me to anger and then go crying to my dad, saying it was my fault and saying how mean I was to her and he believed her. I mean, why believe me? I was just being a disobedient brat in their eyes. I swear to God that the woman was put on this earth and in my life to make me miserable.
Another thing I've come to realize is that I get some perverse enjoyment out of being defiant. Don't ask me why because I don't know. That is something I need to look into. Well, there is a look deep into the mind of Amanda. I hope you enjoyed it.
~Juggy
I am angry at my mother because for as long as I can remember, she has always treated me like shit. She has abused me from the time I was younger until now. I specifically remember a time when she got angry with me and began to spank me with her hand. Once her hand began to hurt, she switched to using a flip-flop. That was quite some years ago, but I remember it as if it were yesterday. There was another time when I was sitting in my room playing my Playstation. My mom walked into my room and began to yell at me because apparently my room wasn't clean. She then took my controller from me, held it over her head and nearly threw it at me. Now that I have grown older, I've grown used to her angry outbursts. I have some very deep-rooted anger and hatred towards her.
I'm angry at my father because not once did he try to save me from my mother's abuse. Each time she would hit me, he'd just look the other way and pretend it never happened. He then divorced my mom (For which I am not angry) and re-married my step-mom. I was fine with that until my step-mom would start provoking me to anger and then getting my dad on her side. The final straw came when she and I had a huge fight and told my dad that he had to choose between me and her (I will ALWAYS hate her for that, but more on that later). You wanna know what he did? He chose her over me and kicked me out of the house. (I was living with him and my step-mom at the time). Do you have any idea how much that hurt? After he kicked me out, he never had time to do anything with me and always saying that he was too busy. So, that's why I am angry with my father.
I'm angry at my step-mother because of one of the things she did. She would always provoke me to anger and then go crying to my dad, saying it was my fault and saying how mean I was to her and he believed her. I mean, why believe me? I was just being a disobedient brat in their eyes. I swear to God that the woman was put on this earth and in my life to make me miserable.
Another thing I've come to realize is that I get some perverse enjoyment out of being defiant. Don't ask me why because I don't know. That is something I need to look into. Well, there is a look deep into the mind of Amanda. I hope you enjoyed it.
~Juggy