While I was out...

[juditigger]

I feel like I was knocked out of this world for weeks.  Turned out it was only two agonizing days.  I did not have H1N1, contrary to rumors, and I will not even dignify it by a clarification.  All I know is I’m happy to be back.  I have not changed, unfortunately for my “success and determination gene” that was in action via my brain as I was waiting for my high fever to go away completely.

I’ve had time to think of a lot of things, including where I am now and what I plan to do with this “now”. Eh, when you’re cured, it’s very seldom that you totally change your outlook especially when your normally screwed up self has been happy with little moments.

I felt a little bad missing work since I have been riled up since Monday because of this momentum whose origin I cannot place. I wish it would still be there when I return on Monday.
I missed this month’s Game Night, too.
So, what has occupied me in the last 48 or so hours? Here are some of them.  Note that half of the time, I was feverish:

1. Before death snatches me away, I wish to read my almost-a-thousand books I laboriously (!!!) hoarded since I started receiving a paycheck. 
2. The reason my unread book pile was only gradually decreasing was my habit of starting a book and not finishing it.  I once told myself reading should not be something I am forced to do just because someone has read this book or that graphic novel already. It does not mean I will not return to those I started reading, I just need to regain the interest to go back and finish it. 
3. The reason above is also why my extensive bookmark collection does not look close to “extensive”. Well, they are serving their purpose, hopefully they’re happy inserted in between pages of lots of my books.
4. Jai Ho. My mother discovered she likes Jai Ho. Only now.
5. The West Wing.  When you are losing confidence in the quality of network television shows, watch any season of this show and it will restore your faith.  It’s compelling, stimulating, just awesome.
6. Only four people have sent me text messages in two days.  One of them was a reply from my boss acknowledging my request for days off.  The other three were from my office friends asking for updates about my condition.  One even inserted seeing man/boy in the lobby; I wasn’t surprised, she’s always been his biggest fan and I didn’t want to burst her bubble by saying something back, so I didn’t. Hahaha.
7. No, I wasn’t disappointed that I only got few text messages.  I was happy with what I got and besides, had it been too plenty, I doubt if I would respond to all. Hehe. Remember my twisted reaction to attention?
8. I developed a girl-crush on Kim Kardashian.
9. I should not be but the freak that I am is bothered by the person whom Lisa Edelstein is dating.
10. I tweeted about it and I’m going to repeat, when I forget why I get lusty over John Mayer, I just watch something like this, and it all comes back to me. Douchebag, douchebag, yeah yeah yeah, but I really really like him.
11. My geeky phase is not going anywhere.  Half the time I was in sickbay, I kept on thinking how much I was missing: my LJ friends, Twitter, FP updates (yes, yes), and Salon updates. No, no Facebook.
12. Abbey Bartlet, the fictional First Lady. I once said how I like watching people like them.  I am not hotwired to be a kind of “Super Woman” but I am always in awe of their kind. Maybe it’s the way the character was written, or it’s Stockard Channing, but I’ve not seen dead-pan so loving and composed.  If I can only be half as great as women like those fictional ones, I would be happy.  Here’s one of plenty calm and composed Abbey Bartlet scenes I love:

ABBEY [to Josh, then running the campaign team]: You can say it, you know. It’s not like I haven’t heard it before.
JOSH: Your husband’s a real son of a bitch, Mrs. Bartlet.
ABBEY: He doesn’t like being handled.
JOSH: Well, I think that if he looked around, he’d see that nobody’s handling him.
ABBEY: He’s not ready yet, Josh. He’s terrified (of being nominated to the Democrat primary).
JOSH: Well, is he going to be ready?
ABBEY: (smiles) You bet your ass he will. In the meantime, you want to kick something, kick me.

There.  Two signs I’m really feeling okay now: I’m still up at 2:45 in the morning and I blogged with almost 800 words. If they still don’t tell you I’m back, tell me what will.