(no subject)
I just finished Mysteries of Pittsburgh by Michael Chabon yesterday. Finishing a book is a weird feeling, kind of whistful and empty and full at the same time. Chabon's books always leave a knot in my chest.
I think it's strange how often I get the feeling I am at the end of an era. Maybe it's an inherent part of summer that I need to (get over myself) and recognize.
Emily was here and we had am amazing time. She might come back to visit again this summer. If not the next time a see her will be the first week I am back in Rhode Island. Then she leaves for Rome for the rest of the school year.
I need something to distract me right now. But, on a longer scale, I also need to think, "Now what?" she has been a very important part of my life this year, so much so that it is kind of hard to imagine what it will be like, even though this time last year I didn't know her at all.
I really need Paul.
I actually cried this morning. I don't know if you know that that that is a big deal. I don't cry very often. Ever since fifth grade or so, I have always seen crying as a strange and unproductive phenomenon that I didn't really understand and didn't really want to take part in.
I don't mean to be emo, but that I where I'm at. This is a big one. It's hard to look driectly at a change that you know will cause you to think about how you will soon be living your life differently.
I think it's strange how often I get the feeling I am at the end of an era. Maybe it's an inherent part of summer that I need to (get over myself) and recognize.
Emily was here and we had am amazing time. She might come back to visit again this summer. If not the next time a see her will be the first week I am back in Rhode Island. Then she leaves for Rome for the rest of the school year.
I need something to distract me right now. But, on a longer scale, I also need to think, "Now what?" she has been a very important part of my life this year, so much so that it is kind of hard to imagine what it will be like, even though this time last year I didn't know her at all.
I really need Paul.
I actually cried this morning. I don't know if you know that that that is a big deal. I don't cry very often. Ever since fifth grade or so, I have always seen crying as a strange and unproductive phenomenon that I didn't really understand and didn't really want to take part in.
I don't mean to be emo, but that I where I'm at. This is a big one. It's hard to look driectly at a change that you know will cause you to think about how you will soon be living your life differently.