x i'll sing it one last time for you, and then we really have to go.
(at work)
"is this one of those knife proof gloves?" -alex, holding up a glove
"mm no idea.." -me
"hmm..well i guess there's only one way to find out! pass me a knife." -alex, putting the glove on
"err i don't think that's a very good idea.." -me
"pass me a knife! a big one." -alex
"okay.." -me
(i pass him a huge butcher's knife)
"okay ready?" -alex
(he takes the knife and slams it down on his hand)
(cuts his hand)
"AHHHHHHHHH! WHAT THE FUCK, WHY DID I JUST DO THAT!?" -alex
ahahah, ohh wow. that was so amazing.
wow, to work at my work, i swear all you need is a pulse. everyone there is literally insane. examples:
kelly - she twitches every 3 seconds. she sings to herself as loud as she can. she randomly laughs hysterically and when people ask what's funny, she starts crying.
alex - errr..see quote above.
linda - she has a huge, unnatural obsession with dogs. and she looks exactly like napolean dynomite.
helen - she's pretty much deaf. one second she's so happy and she's dancing all over the place, and the next second she's screaming and threatening to fire you.
carmela - she's about 3 feet tall. she can't speak english, and when she tries, her voice is so high that you can't understand her anyways.
sarah - she looks like she's 10 but she's actually about 30. she walks around smiling...all day.
chris - he acts more gay than anybody i have ever met (i'm talking jack from will & grace, to the power of 11) except...that he's married to a girl and has kids.
christine - she talks to herself. she thinks life is a race, and she runs everywhere. even if it's just 2 feet. she also tells me regularly about how beef gives her gas..
ohhhhkay, well at least..they don't..discriminate at my work..?
i have a pita, and you don't.
staci<33
ps-
kyle, i got your message on my cellphone, but this is all i heard:
"hey, i'm at idhiughregre, but ejwhfiuewhifrew..i was wondering if you ewigfuiehrgerhi...work..rehiurehghrigeiur..yeah but whatever..rejkhgeri..k bye."