Girlfriends=Money!
As you all know, it's been a minute or two since I've had a steady girlfriend. One aspect that had slipped my mind was the amount of money that is spent when you have one. First let me say that I have never been so pissed at a phone bill more than I was today. Verizon hadn't sent me a statement in a couple of months and being as busy as I am, paying my phone bill kinda slipped my mind. Well I decided to create an account online just to see how bad the bill was and possibly pay it. I knew that it would be kinda high, since I've been talking more, but button down the hatches because you all are about to literally shit your pants when I tell you what it was.
Hold on, I've got to breathe, I'm pissed just thinking about it....
Huff
Puff
Huff
Puff
It was $867.37!!!! Needless to say I fuckin freaked and then I called Katie (to add more charges) and said we can't talk to much during the day anymore. This will probably lead to problems, but I can't afford this shit on a teacher's salary.
I will say that everything else pretty much evens out though spending wise. Her is a synopsis of replacement charges when you get a girlfriend
Single Life Girlfriend life Neil's life
1. Drinking money $100/wk $150/wk $105/wk (Katie
is kinda a lightweight)
2. Sex Does a hand count? Is your G-friend pissed at you? What is this sex you speak of?
3. Clothing t-shirts Polo's Clothing optional
4. Free time Sports, porn, drink, puke Movies, eating, shopping Drinking and driving to the MAX!!!
5. Movies comedies, action, porn chick flicks Watching the movie Stick It (I wish
I'd brought a gun).
6. Jewishness JEWWWW!!! I am not anti-semitic I wish I had blonde hair and blue eyes
7. Be-Bop cola I love Sealab I now have to watch Blow Out I'd rather have a Mingus Dew
8. Friends I'll never leave you guys See you guys, I'm going to have sex A little of both
Well that's it for now, if anyone else can think of more categories, feel free to add
P.S. Sorry it's hard to read, but I got tired of messing with it, so deal with it.
Hold on, I've got to breathe, I'm pissed just thinking about it....
Huff
Puff
Huff
Puff
It was $867.37!!!! Needless to say I fuckin freaked and then I called Katie (to add more charges) and said we can't talk to much during the day anymore. This will probably lead to problems, but I can't afford this shit on a teacher's salary.
I will say that everything else pretty much evens out though spending wise. Her is a synopsis of replacement charges when you get a girlfriend
Single Life Girlfriend life Neil's life
1. Drinking money $100/wk $150/wk $105/wk (Katie
is kinda a lightweight)
2. Sex Does a hand count? Is your G-friend pissed at you? What is this sex you speak of?
3. Clothing t-shirts Polo's Clothing optional
4. Free time Sports, porn, drink, puke Movies, eating, shopping Drinking and driving to the MAX!!!
5. Movies comedies, action, porn chick flicks Watching the movie Stick It (I wish
I'd brought a gun).
6. Jewishness JEWWWW!!! I am not anti-semitic I wish I had blonde hair and blue eyes
7. Be-Bop cola I love Sealab I now have to watch Blow Out I'd rather have a Mingus Dew
8. Friends I'll never leave you guys See you guys, I'm going to have sex A little of both
Well that's it for now, if anyone else can think of more categories, feel free to add
P.S. Sorry it's hard to read, but I got tired of messing with it, so deal with it.