LIFE
School, work, home, God, and a love life that doesn't exist to anyone else but me...
SCHOOL: All is good I guess.It's my senior year... and i'm glad to be leaving. After contemplating going to NC state, Stetson(ha! yeah right), FSU or UCF, i've decided to just go to valencia. My mom WAS going to move to North Carolina and I WAS gonna go to NC state, but I hate it there so I figured i'd go to FSU and use the excuse of being "away at college" to stay away from there, but then my mom said that if I stayed and went to UCF, she'd stay here with me. Then I figured why waste my money going to a school I really don't wanna go to when I can spend half of that and go to a school I atleast don't mind going to. So yeah, Valencia's pretty much it for me. My decision has been made. I'm just glad I don't have to worry about college applications anymore. I have to much crap going on right now.
WORK: I was about to put in my two weeks notice when they decided it was ok for me to work two more days in the week. So now I work Tuesdays&thursdays as a server/runner for the bar and Saturdays&sundays as a party host. I'm ok with that. Except now that means no after school anything for me. I can probably still do ensembles if things work out, but i'm not too sure about that. I still haven't requested off for the new york trip. I know, I know, time will catch up to me, but I keep forgetting. I have other things on my mind. One of the girls quit(thank God). She was a bit of a biatch and I was getting tired of trying to keep the peace between everyone and her. The new party host seems really nice. Hopefully she doesn't bring any drama to the boardwalk familia.
HOME: Home sweet home.... sometimes...ok, barely ever. I guess i'm used to it, but i'm scared that i'll turn out to be the way they are too. My parents are great parents, but suck at being a couple. Not that they are a couple. And they also suck at leaving us out of things. I'm sick of everything. I HATE being in the middle. I ALWAYS get stuck making the peace between them or I get stuck as the mode of communication. Oh, thats always a fun one. MOM-"tell your dad i said this" ME-"why don't you do it yourself?" MOM-"you know he won't answer my calls" and then I get to hear this huge story of why he won't. Oh and guess what!! I get the same crap from my dad. It's funny how i'm the middle child, and i'm the one always getting stuck in the middle. Does this happen with all middle children? I've always wondered about that....
Love Life: Everyone has one. Whether they're taken or single. Everyone has a certain someone they think about, and possibly pray for before they go to bed. Unfortunately, thinking about him is not enough. I would love to tell him about these feelings, but i'm scared. Not of my feelings, but i'm scared of him. Of what he'd say. People tell me everyday "what do you have to lose?" but oh man do I have a lot to lose? We're freaking friends. Friendship is so important to me you don't even know. I've cried over friendships, i've freaked out when I even thought I had screwed one up. So this isn't as easy as it seems. I'd rather be friends and him never know, than him know and not be friends. Cuz i'm pretty sure he feels nothing even close to what i'm feeling for him. *sigh* This sucks. Oh and seeing Tristen&Isolde today didn't exactly help. That movie is so depressing.
God: He's the only one you guys. The only one I can turn to when I want to strangle my parents. The only one there with me when i'm in my room crying over anything. I wish I knew exactly how he would like to be thanked, but I don't. He's the only one that I can be sure will never stop loving me.
Ok so... why you read this whole thing, I have no idea. If you didn't read it, then whatever. It's not important. BYE! :)
SCHOOL: All is good I guess.It's my senior year... and i'm glad to be leaving. After contemplating going to NC state, Stetson(ha! yeah right), FSU or UCF, i've decided to just go to valencia. My mom WAS going to move to North Carolina and I WAS gonna go to NC state, but I hate it there so I figured i'd go to FSU and use the excuse of being "away at college" to stay away from there, but then my mom said that if I stayed and went to UCF, she'd stay here with me. Then I figured why waste my money going to a school I really don't wanna go to when I can spend half of that and go to a school I atleast don't mind going to. So yeah, Valencia's pretty much it for me. My decision has been made. I'm just glad I don't have to worry about college applications anymore. I have to much crap going on right now.
WORK: I was about to put in my two weeks notice when they decided it was ok for me to work two more days in the week. So now I work Tuesdays&thursdays as a server/runner for the bar and Saturdays&sundays as a party host. I'm ok with that. Except now that means no after school anything for me. I can probably still do ensembles if things work out, but i'm not too sure about that. I still haven't requested off for the new york trip. I know, I know, time will catch up to me, but I keep forgetting. I have other things on my mind. One of the girls quit(thank God). She was a bit of a biatch and I was getting tired of trying to keep the peace between everyone and her. The new party host seems really nice. Hopefully she doesn't bring any drama to the boardwalk familia.
HOME: Home sweet home.... sometimes...ok, barely ever. I guess i'm used to it, but i'm scared that i'll turn out to be the way they are too. My parents are great parents, but suck at being a couple. Not that they are a couple. And they also suck at leaving us out of things. I'm sick of everything. I HATE being in the middle. I ALWAYS get stuck making the peace between them or I get stuck as the mode of communication. Oh, thats always a fun one. MOM-"tell your dad i said this" ME-"why don't you do it yourself?" MOM-"you know he won't answer my calls" and then I get to hear this huge story of why he won't. Oh and guess what!! I get the same crap from my dad. It's funny how i'm the middle child, and i'm the one always getting stuck in the middle. Does this happen with all middle children? I've always wondered about that....
Love Life: Everyone has one. Whether they're taken or single. Everyone has a certain someone they think about, and possibly pray for before they go to bed. Unfortunately, thinking about him is not enough. I would love to tell him about these feelings, but i'm scared. Not of my feelings, but i'm scared of him. Of what he'd say. People tell me everyday "what do you have to lose?" but oh man do I have a lot to lose? We're freaking friends. Friendship is so important to me you don't even know. I've cried over friendships, i've freaked out when I even thought I had screwed one up. So this isn't as easy as it seems. I'd rather be friends and him never know, than him know and not be friends. Cuz i'm pretty sure he feels nothing even close to what i'm feeling for him. *sigh* This sucks. Oh and seeing Tristen&Isolde today didn't exactly help. That movie is so depressing.
God: He's the only one you guys. The only one I can turn to when I want to strangle my parents. The only one there with me when i'm in my room crying over anything. I wish I knew exactly how he would like to be thanked, but I don't. He's the only one that I can be sure will never stop loving me.
Ok so... why you read this whole thing, I have no idea. If you didn't read it, then whatever. It's not important. BYE! :)