The greater the love, the more false to its object... (Part 2)
Laurie turned the key and pulled open the door to the flat. He pushed his suitcase through with one foot as he juggled his briefcase with the other. He should go out for some food once he unpacked, but the thought of food made his stomach twist. He kept thinking last night that Ralph would come back. He had to come back. But he never did. Laurie kept imagining him... God knows, almost anyone else would treat him better.
When he turned Ralph was standing in front of the bookcase, a book in his hand.
Laurie looked down at the suitcase and back to Ralph's bland face. "I should have thought..." he said. "I'll go to a hotel."
"Don't be silly, Spud. The place is as much yours as mine. You didn't tell me you were coming to London. I meant to have telephoned you later."
"I'm working here between terms." He sat his briefcase on the sofa. "Ralph, there's something else..."
Ralph raised one ash-coloured eyebrow. "More?"
"I didn't mean for things to go this far. It just got out of hand." He shook his head. That sounded as though he was trying to creep out of the blame. Making a speech only made things worse so he took the contract out of his briefcase and handed it to Ralph. "You'd better look at that."
Ralph slowly read it and then lifted his eyes to stare at Laurie. "How many people did you show it to?"
"Collins called a literary agent he knows and the agent showed it to a publisher. The publisher..." He gestured. "Well, you can see. He wants to buy it."
Ralph's eyes coldly raked Laurie, up and down. "You seriously think I'm going to sign this?"
"Would you at least think about it? However mad you are with me..." He could really use a drink and wondered if Ralph had stocked the liquor yet, but couldn't bring himself to ask. "Ralph, you tell people stories. You know you do. I didn't think you'd take it like this. I swear."
"That's different than you showing my private papers," Ralph said softly. "I trusted you."
A fist formed in Laurie's throat and he had to force his words past it. "I'm sorry, Ralph." He looked around the flat they had shared such a short time those two months they'd had together. "It would be better if I left, wouldn't it? But I wish you'd at least think about it. The bloody novel... The bloody novel is good. That's why I did it. I wanted to do something... for you." His voice trailed off helplessly.
Ralph's mouth was thin and tight, a harsh line between two brackets. He gave the contract a scathing look and put it down. "Bloody hell. You were helping me?"
At least he hadn't torn it up, Laurie thought.
"I can't change what I did. It..." He choked on a laugh. "It seemed like a good idea at the time."
"I see." Ralph picked up the book he had been examining and put it back into its place on the shelf. "And now a good idea would be to put my private thoughts in print with my name on it for everyone to examine. That's it, is it?"
"I didn't know you'd hate the idea, Ralph." He really did feel a bit sick.
"I can do with a drink," Ralph said, "and I you look as though you could as well." Ralph went to the sideboard and there was the rattle of bottles and glasses.
Laurie took a long sip of the drink when Ralph handed it to him. It was one of Ralph's stronger doubles and it seemed to settle him as it went down. "If you hate it so much, then tear the thing up, but I do wish you'd think about it first."
Ralph half emptied his drink with a jerk. "So what is this job you have between terms?"
Laurie felt himself go pale. How could things get any worse? "I'm working for that literary agent as an assistant."
Ralph finished his drink with a single swallow. "Of course. Well, that is lucky for you, I suppose." He went back to the sideboard and refilled his glass. He lit a cigarette and settled into one of the wing chairs staring past the walls of the room as though they weren't there. "There are sandwiches in the kitchen, but I think this will do for me."
(Part 3 to follow)