Things!

[jrronimo]

I've been watching lots of things! I watched all of the recent Doctor Who (2005-onward) and Torchwood (Captain Jack is so dreamy. *_*). I took a break from Gundam after "Gundam SEED" and watched an anime called "The Law of Ueki" which was really quite enjoyable. Next it's back to Gundam, though, with "Gundam SEED Destiny". I'm actually nearing

Comments

[erikochan]

Wow, lots of friends turning 30 this year! Don't be scared. It really is just a number. In a couple years you will wonder what the big fuss was about. But I am going to offer you some advice below because looking at your situation, I see a lot of where I was myself when I was about to turn 30... I hope you don't mind.

As someone who freaked out when she approached 30, it was a really bad time. I put all my nervous energy into the wrong things. In fact, I did a lot of silly (and almost detrimental) things because I was more worried about what I was "supposed to have done" by the time I was 30 than actually taking care of myself. I stayed in a job where I wasn't particularly happy, and where my supervisors didn't respect me or appreciate what I had to offer. I looked around and saw that all my friends/schoolmates were successful in their careers, married/getting married and some were even having kids already. Just before turning 30, I began dating someone who didn't appreciate me and generally wasn't right for me, because I was thinking that I'm running out of time and maybe this relationship is as good as I'm going to get (Btw, this is wrong! You should never settle for someone who isn't right for you.) I thought that I needed to get moving if I ever want to have a family (which is still one of my goals) and this guy has a good job, doesn't do drugs or smoke, etc., etc.

What I didn't understand then is that I am never going to be happy as I want to be with someone else until I'm happy with myself first. Even if I find the perfect partner who loves me as I am and we have a wonderful family, I'm still going to be unhappy until I learn to truly love myself and take steps to make sure my needs are taken care of. This is not being selfish, this is doing things right. Of course, I still care very much for the important people in my life, and I still give a lot of my time to worthy causes, etc. but I realized that I really and truly need to make sure *I'm* an important person in my life and in fact my interests should come before anyone else's opinions of what I should be doing. Period. I needed to be fulfilled, both physically (e.g. eating, sleeping), in daily life (hobbies, spending time with quality friends, job satisfaction) and spiritually (happy with my career, satisfaction with life in general). And I needed to stop lying to myself about whether I'm satisfied with things or not. This is when I quit my job and took a long hard look at myself (and later decided to go into law).

Now I'm not recommending that you do anything nearly so drastic! But as instead of worrying about turning 30, I want you to instead start thinking about what you need instead of what you think that other expect from you. So make your one and only resolution at 30 to be this: Make yourself the most important person in your life.

Happy birthday!