Hail to the Me
Well, I guess my summer in BC has been thrown into doubt once again.
As you've probably heard by now, I've been picked as the new pope. Apparently, Mom being Catholic was good enough for them.
It's probably because a good friend of mine, Francesco Hanza Giovanni Cinquo de Mayo el Furete, is a respected cardinal. He called me up to give me the news himself.
"James!" he said in a stereotypical italian manner, which bugs me, 'cause he's from Thailand.
"Wha?" I reply.
"The votes are in, and you're the new pope!"
"Get out."
"No, you're the new friggin pope!"
"Wow." I was pretty much bewildered. "Since when?"
"Since, like, two minutes ago. I was like, 'Hey, you know who'd be a good pope? Jimmmy'd make a friggin' awesome pope."
"Why the hell am I the new pope?"
"Well, it basicly came down to wanting someone younger and edgier, and in really good shape, and challenges the old fashioned pope dynamic." He paused to breathe, "Plus, you do that thing where you flip the stick around, and that'd look good with the cane. Goin' all kung fu like, hi-yaa, and shit. Wa-ha!"
"Are you all right?"
"You know, man, the pope's hat is so huge..."
I think I now know what they burn to make the smoke go different colors.
As you've probably heard by now, I've been picked as the new pope. Apparently, Mom being Catholic was good enough for them.
It's probably because a good friend of mine, Francesco Hanza Giovanni Cinquo de Mayo el Furete, is a respected cardinal. He called me up to give me the news himself.
"James!" he said in a stereotypical italian manner, which bugs me, 'cause he's from Thailand.
"Wha?" I reply.
"The votes are in, and you're the new pope!"
"Get out."
"No, you're the new friggin pope!"
"Wow." I was pretty much bewildered. "Since when?"
"Since, like, two minutes ago. I was like, 'Hey, you know who'd be a good pope? Jimmmy'd make a friggin' awesome pope."
"Why the hell am I the new pope?"
"Well, it basicly came down to wanting someone younger and edgier, and in really good shape, and challenges the old fashioned pope dynamic." He paused to breathe, "Plus, you do that thing where you flip the stick around, and that'd look good with the cane. Goin' all kung fu like, hi-yaa, and shit. Wa-ha!"
"Are you all right?"
"You know, man, the pope's hat is so huge..."
I think I now know what they burn to make the smoke go different colors.