ok....
so it seems that i only update when im pissed off or when im depressed.... well im depressed tonight. so i started talking to this girl a couple weeks ago, and she wanted to see a picture of me (i met her on jdate). and everytime i would send her a picture she wouldnt get it or whatever, and it took me so many tries to send her one, and finally yesterday i took the best picture of myself and i sent it to her on megans AOL mail so she wouldnt have to dl anything, only open the mail. well today it talked to her and she didnt get it, so i was like well the picture updated on jdate, so go look on it there. then i started talking to someone else, and she went away, but when i went on jdate it said she was online there.... so i was like ok she is gonna look or whatever, cuz she told me she randomly goes idle on AIM cuz of whatever. so a couple hours later she still had not viewed me, and was still away with the same message. and i know last night when i talked to her she said that she had semi-formal today. so i dont know if she was just like whatever i dont want to talk to him, or it was just that she was buisy with stuff for tonight, or im reading to far into this or whatever. its so annoying cuz i just want to finally meet a girl that isnt crazy, and that i connect with, and just have fun with (not in a sexual way). like its been over a year now, and i havent met someone yet that i have gotten anywhere near serious with. i know that i am leaving for cedar point in a little over a month, but i am cool with leaving for there with a girlfriend here, cuz whatever if i meet a girl there its prolly just gonna be a summer fling and what not. but anyways.. back to carly, shes really cute, and when i do talk to her i love talking to her, and she goes to the school i wanna go to, and its like my kinnda girl, not like some of the girls in the past year i tried to settle for. i just dont want to be single anymore. i dont know how to explain it, but i dont like not having to answer to someone on my every move. i loved the feeling of going out and doing whatever, and then going home and talking for hours, or anticepating the weekend so i can go where she is and visit her. i just dont want to be single anymore, and i know its weird cuz i was only not single for almost 9 months, but its like i want to be happy again, and be dating someone, but it hasent worked out in the past year. this time i really want it to work though.... but it sad to say im not going to get my hopes up.... :'(