we're gonna need a bigger boat

[jrenegade]

I recently decided to stop being a big game hunter in the outbacks of Africa and come home and attempt to do something the greater good of mankind. So today was my first day at the local aquarium and science center. Due to my previous employment I was the perfect choice to help test the new shark protection suit that they had recently finished a prototype of. I dove in thinking the suit to be in tip top shape and that it would protect me from the 100 foot great white monster....sadly I was wrong. The first attack on me that the shark made ripped right through the lower part of the suit exposing my pink heart boxers that grandma had given me last holiday. I knew I was in for a fight. I took all my instincts from the jungles and years of fighting lions and tigers and kangaroos and made my own attack on the shark. With in moments I was on top of the great beast as he bucked wildly as if I was Luck Perry in that movie 8 Seconds, I held on for dear life on his fin as he tried to throw me from his back. I had no choice but to punch him in the back of the head and knock him out cold. Knowing the great beast was not to blame I did not kill the animal.

Tomorrow we test another suit. Wish me luck.

J Renegade.