(no subject)
so I spent all of sunday alone... to be honest.. I didn't like it much... no.. that's a lie.. I didn't like it at all... I don't like being alone... and I really miss someone.... and I can't do anything about that anymore.... even though we had a lot in commen.. the way we were brought up was just way to different... she was brought up one way of thinking.. and I was brought up another way.... I just realy believe that no one should ever force their beliefes on any one else.. thinking for our selfes is our god given right. and no one should tell us how to think or believe.. sure we can agree with what someone says.. but just because we can't dosn't mean ether is wrong.. that's just the way they think.. and that's the only thing that should be accepted... I'm not right.. I'm not wrong.. that's just my opntion and I should respect the opnion of that other person.
that's how I was brought up anyway..... that even though I might believe something is bad.. or even against God... it's not for me to judge them... Matthew 7:1, "Judge not that ye be not judged." there will come a day when that person that I think is doing wrong will face God.... and he and only he will make that distion..
I try my best not to judge people.. it's hard to in my line of work.. last month alone I met 9 people with the charge of Murder.... one of them being a 17 year old girl... she's in there right now for killing her best friend for saying something she wanted to do with her boyfriend.... when I heard that.. it's very hard not to judge... but I keep in mind that I'm only human.. and so is she... and I wasn't in that situation.. so who am I to say anything.. I'm not god...
I guess one thing that does upset me is what I had to do... I was asked to turn my back on the people that helped me when I needed them the abslote most... how can someone do that? I mean if it were just people I knew.. that I hardly talked to... to even a friend that was just there to hang out.. that never helped me... I wouldn't have had this problem.... but I was asked to turn my back on 2 people that have been there for me... who and will always will be there for me... it really didn't matter what the other half of the choice was... regardless of the fact.. I was being asked to just leave those people I considered family.. and that's what hurt the most.... how can someone in there right mind just abandon the people that have been there for them... it actualy sickens me to think of someone that would actuly do that... what kind of a monster could do something like that...
but I guess I wouldn't have had to make a chose if the person I was with didn't deam those friends evil... to them, it didn't matter what good they did... they were bad... and they were already labled that way before they even met my friends... to be condemed before even given a chance...
I don't know how i could live the rest of my life with a person like that... if it wasn't my friends.. it would have been something else... she would say somethings bad.. and even if I agreed that what ever was bad.. we would still have an agrument because I would refuse to judge them.. I try to follow the golden rule as much as I can... "do on to other as you would like them do on to you..." no where in that statment does it say "do on to others as you would like them do on to you... well.. not really.. if they're doing something you think is wrong.. even though they have always been good to you... cut them off from your life." I guess it's because that can't fit on a bumber sticker....
I do want to get married... I would LOVE to get married... and I want to be with my wife when she goes out with her friends.. even if I don't like what they're doing..... and I would like my wife to come with me with my friends.. even if she dosn't want to do what they want to do... I mean I wouldn't force her to do anything.. she can stand next to the DDR machine while I play.. or she can go play X-men on another machine... but if there were friends that she had that I couldn't stand... then I would want her to still go out with them.. because they're her friends... and I would like the same... I mean.. it's not like we would see these people every day.. and who's to say even once a week... I would want to spend as much time as I could with my wife.. but really.... there are times in a marage when we want to spend just a few hours away from our spouse.. some couples do this by going shoping on there own or with friends.. some others rather just go visit a family member for a few hours.. some... just go hang with the neighbor. kick back a few buds... talk.. have a good time...
like I said before.. we has humans need human contact in our lives... but at the same time... we has humans also need a little alone time every now and then....
I don't judge people.. I accept them for who they are. the only people I do not want in my life are.. Closed minded people, people that treat me like shit because even though I may not like them treating me like shit.. I can't judge them.. BUT I can stay away from them.. <;o) I mean.. as long as they treat me with a lil respect.. show me that they're not leechers... people that I can depend on if I'm ever in a time of need... then.. who ever they are.. I will accept them as a friend...
the one thing I always look for..... the one thing I'm always looking for... . . ... ........ to be treated with the same respect as I give the other person...... that inclused just about everything... in other words...... I just want them to be as understanding as me... if I have no problem with something they're doing.. they shouldn't have any problem with me doing the same... and if I did have a problem with it... I would talk it over.. and if the problem is still there.. accept it... because I'm not going to force my believes or opnions on anyone.. no mater how much I don't like something they're doing.. I can stated it.. "I don't like it when you do this..." but never will I say "you're not going to do this because I don't like it"
Never the less.... even after venting.... I still miss that someone....I miss her a great deal.... maybe I'm not lonely enough to dismiss everything I believe in... maybe I don't want to get married badly enough to forget the people that have been there for me... but then maybe... I just want someone that can understand me... and is willing to give me the freedem of choice.. and is willing to accept what ever choice that may be...
I still feel lonely.... and I still want to be with that person... I'm still in love... and it still hurts knowing I may not get to see her again... but I'm still not going to give up everything I've been tought.. everything I beleive in.. and end up being someone that says "yes dear" "what ever you say dear" the rest of my life.. being married means 2 people as a whole... 50 50 not 10 90... no 49 51... equals... I don't expect my other half to say those things to me.. and I don't expect them expeting me to say those things ether...
-.- maybe it's for the best... but even if it is... it still hurts...
that's how I was brought up anyway..... that even though I might believe something is bad.. or even against God... it's not for me to judge them... Matthew 7:1, "Judge not that ye be not judged." there will come a day when that person that I think is doing wrong will face God.... and he and only he will make that distion..
I try my best not to judge people.. it's hard to in my line of work.. last month alone I met 9 people with the charge of Murder.... one of them being a 17 year old girl... she's in there right now for killing her best friend for saying something she wanted to do with her boyfriend.... when I heard that.. it's very hard not to judge... but I keep in mind that I'm only human.. and so is she... and I wasn't in that situation.. so who am I to say anything.. I'm not god...
I guess one thing that does upset me is what I had to do... I was asked to turn my back on the people that helped me when I needed them the abslote most... how can someone do that? I mean if it were just people I knew.. that I hardly talked to... to even a friend that was just there to hang out.. that never helped me... I wouldn't have had this problem.... but I was asked to turn my back on 2 people that have been there for me... who and will always will be there for me... it really didn't matter what the other half of the choice was... regardless of the fact.. I was being asked to just leave those people I considered family.. and that's what hurt the most.... how can someone in there right mind just abandon the people that have been there for them... it actualy sickens me to think of someone that would actuly do that... what kind of a monster could do something like that...
but I guess I wouldn't have had to make a chose if the person I was with didn't deam those friends evil... to them, it didn't matter what good they did... they were bad... and they were already labled that way before they even met my friends... to be condemed before even given a chance...
I don't know how i could live the rest of my life with a person like that... if it wasn't my friends.. it would have been something else... she would say somethings bad.. and even if I agreed that what ever was bad.. we would still have an agrument because I would refuse to judge them.. I try to follow the golden rule as much as I can... "do on to other as you would like them do on to you..." no where in that statment does it say "do on to others as you would like them do on to you... well.. not really.. if they're doing something you think is wrong.. even though they have always been good to you... cut them off from your life." I guess it's because that can't fit on a bumber sticker....
I do want to get married... I would LOVE to get married... and I want to be with my wife when she goes out with her friends.. even if I don't like what they're doing..... and I would like my wife to come with me with my friends.. even if she dosn't want to do what they want to do... I mean I wouldn't force her to do anything.. she can stand next to the DDR machine while I play.. or she can go play X-men on another machine... but if there were friends that she had that I couldn't stand... then I would want her to still go out with them.. because they're her friends... and I would like the same... I mean.. it's not like we would see these people every day.. and who's to say even once a week... I would want to spend as much time as I could with my wife.. but really.... there are times in a marage when we want to spend just a few hours away from our spouse.. some couples do this by going shoping on there own or with friends.. some others rather just go visit a family member for a few hours.. some... just go hang with the neighbor. kick back a few buds... talk.. have a good time...
like I said before.. we has humans need human contact in our lives... but at the same time... we has humans also need a little alone time every now and then....
I don't judge people.. I accept them for who they are. the only people I do not want in my life are.. Closed minded people, people that treat me like shit because even though I may not like them treating me like shit.. I can't judge them.. BUT I can stay away from them.. <;o) I mean.. as long as they treat me with a lil respect.. show me that they're not leechers... people that I can depend on if I'm ever in a time of need... then.. who ever they are.. I will accept them as a friend...
the one thing I always look for..... the one thing I'm always looking for... . . ... ........ to be treated with the same respect as I give the other person...... that inclused just about everything... in other words...... I just want them to be as understanding as me... if I have no problem with something they're doing.. they shouldn't have any problem with me doing the same... and if I did have a problem with it... I would talk it over.. and if the problem is still there.. accept it... because I'm not going to force my believes or opnions on anyone.. no mater how much I don't like something they're doing.. I can stated it.. "I don't like it when you do this..." but never will I say "you're not going to do this because I don't like it"
Never the less.... even after venting.... I still miss that someone....I miss her a great deal.... maybe I'm not lonely enough to dismiss everything I believe in... maybe I don't want to get married badly enough to forget the people that have been there for me... but then maybe... I just want someone that can understand me... and is willing to give me the freedem of choice.. and is willing to accept what ever choice that may be...
I still feel lonely.... and I still want to be with that person... I'm still in love... and it still hurts knowing I may not get to see her again... but I'm still not going to give up everything I've been tought.. everything I beleive in.. and end up being someone that says "yes dear" "what ever you say dear" the rest of my life.. being married means 2 people as a whole... 50 50 not 10 90... no 49 51... equals... I don't expect my other half to say those things to me.. and I don't expect them expeting me to say those things ether...
-.- maybe it's for the best... but even if it is... it still hurts...