After talking to John on the phone, I wrote what I think was probably my third paper journal entry today. Then I lay back all comfy on my bed and pulled the comforter over me and closed my eyes. I know I'd sound foolish to say this, but I wasn't expecting to fall asleep. I was in bed for about three hours. I woke up two hours into it thinking oh man, I really shouldn't be sleeping. I'll never get to bed tonight. Then I just fell back to sleep for another hour.
I had this weird dream during the last hour of my nap. I can't remember enough of the details to write it in my dream journal. It was so fleeting. All I remember is that I was on a bed about my size, with dark red sheets, like mine has, on the right side, where I usually sleep, but the bed wasn't in my room. It was somewhere else, in the corner of some house I'd never been to. On the other side of the bed was kind of a half-wall, or a separator that kind of hid the bed from being in plain view in the room. The carpet was creamy beige. John was sleeping next to me on the left, and my cat, Japhy/Oreo/Japhorio was lying down in the middle of the bed by our feet {he usually sleeps right next to me on the right edge of the bed and I curve around him because I'm whipped}. I sat up on the bed and played with the cat for a while. I was in a pretty good mood. The kind of good mood you're in when you're playing with your favorite pet. This was the good mood I was in during the entire dream. There was a rather large {or at least larger than mine} television near the foot of the bed. Next to the television was a window. The tv was on, and I think the news was on, but I don't really remember.
John got out of the bed. I distinctly remember him wearing white pajamas with gray or blue pinstripes going down them.
As he left, my mother came into the room to talk to me about something. I was still sitting near the end of the bed, playing with Japhy and my mom sat on the edge on what was John's side. She might have been wearing her favourite colour, the one I always associate with her, burgundy. I can't remember what she wanted to talk to me about, but I remember saying "okay".
When she left, John walked back in and sat where my mother just was and said as though he had an epiphany while he was out, "I think there's something we should talk about." It was in a concerned but not worried way that he said it. I shrugged and said "okay" just as I did with my mother and then I woke up.
Well I guess that was enough detail after all. I'll add it to the dream journal I guess.
Yeah, tell me that's not a little Freudian. Cat, parent, John, all in bed.
Dreamjournal.net says a wall means there might be a protective attitude involved. Maybe restraining walls of long held convictions. It could also mean restraint itself, a barrier or difficulty. Next to a bed, that has a lot of meaning. As for what John was wearing, white symbolizes "purity, completeness, the open door of possibilities." Strangely, in some dreams white is very threatening." Gray can mean serious thoughts, officiousness. Blue relates to "mind, religious feelings, spirituality, the sky. If a dark murky, blue moodiness, depression, fear." Cats represent luck, femininity and are able to see in the dark, depicting intuition or a message.
Anyway.
When I woke up from my nap, I made a sammich and turned on the tv JUST IN TIME........for Jim Gaffigan on comedy central. :):):):):):)
[Gaffigan voice]I like speaker phone. But whenever you're on speaker phone people say you sound like you're in a well.
Are you in a well?
Actually I am in a well. Luckily there's a phone down here so I could call you. I was making people guess, but you knew right away that I was in a well.[/Gaffigan]
Comedians turn me on.
Tonight there was an Irish comedian on the same show. Comedians with Irish accents make me feel melty and twitterpaited.
I got my foreign language software in the mail today!! Now I have something to do during those empty early hours of the morning when there's nothing on tv but bad anime and infomercials. I'm so excited!! It's funny, because on the first cd, they have all of the language you actually care about learning. Chinese, English, French, German, Italian, Japanese, Portuguese, Russian, and Spanish. And the second disk has Arabic, Brazilian (which I guess is different from Portuguese), Danish, Hebrew, Korean, Swahili, Tagalog {?}, Tamil, and Zulu. Yep. I'm gonna learn me some Zulu. Hah.
I can't wait to learn Japanese. And the French part of this should really help me this semester. Anything that eventually leads to a better travel experience is lovely. Plus, I can relearn what I refused to retain during my Spanish classes out of hatred for Senora Brault {grrr}. I'm so tired of being less than bilingual.
Yeah, I'm giddy.
I saw a position the other day for a temporary job I'm interested in. I emailed the person last night, asking them if it was still available. I'm no longer planning on doing phone sex, not until the end of the summer. Because of the contracts involved and other requirements, I can't commit until I'm also settled into the school year. This job I'm talking about though is somewhere along the same lines. It's a position in description writing. What I'd be doing is writing 500-1000 word descriptions to go along with pictures of girls on phone sex websites, describing their bodies, fantasies, likes, dislikes.
Could you imagine what would happen if I just lost it and decided to get drunk or stoned and write some very nonsexy things
"Synthia and Vicky are roommates at college who are just addicted to getting each other off. But what they like even more is luring men into their dorms for a kinky night of BDSM and then using Vicky's nail file to slowly saw off their genitals while they're still strapped to the bed. Cynthia has three kids who need braces and has had over 17 sexy abortions! Guys, dial in now."
Yeah.
I went to the gym today. As I walked in, I saw this guy I went to school with, Marty. One of the preppies who was my Latin class and all of my AP and Honors classes in high school but never said a word to me after the fifth grade. He recognized me enough to say "Heeeyy.." but didn't quite place the face and hit the "Maria" so replaced my name with "How are ya?". I smirked because it was so obvious and said "I'm fine. and you?" The whole thing was easy to read. Soon it was very "Ah crap, now I recognize you and that greeting may have been a little too enthused."
Ah or I could just be making that up. A lot of those kids in high school got on my nerves every once in a while.
While I was at the gym, that anorexic woman was there and Oprah was on. One really means the other. Today's episode was about Cinderella stories. Women who had very little and then had everything they ever wanted. There was this one woman called the rooster lady. She was pretty and normal, except she could make these really weird noises. It really wasn't that amazing. But somehow it led to her meeting this billionaire guy and living in this 12 million dollar home with 7 fireplaces and like a mote. Just as an everyday gift or something, the guy bought her a one of a kind limo. Their wedding cost like 7 million dollars and the diamond on her ring was bigger than my thumbnail.
Anorexia woman and I were both pretty disgusted by this. I was surprised, I didn't think she'd be as upset about it as I was. We usually seem to disagree on Oprah. I mean, she doesn't know that, because I'm the queen of the nod and smile, but hey, common ground on hating such a waste of money. I mean really... there's enjoying the finer things if you can afford them, and then there's just too much.
I got to thinking about the other women at the gym including Anorexia woman. I'm so different from them. They always comment on the show and they seem so disgusted by things I find to be no big deal. For example, on monday, the show was about this teacher who fell in love with her 17 year old student. Anorexia woman found that to be completely disgusting as did the rest of the ladies there. The kid graduated and the couple is still together now and they have a son and everything. Nope, still wrong because he was under 18 to her. I found it weird how black and white everything seems to them sometimes. She's in her forties or fifties but I can't blame it on a generation thing. Michael's fifty something and he's open-minded about most things. I'm sure he'd be cheering on the teacher.
I've been meaning to ask my mother what her wedding was like, my dad being a rich asshole himself and all, but I'm afraid she'd ask me back what mine'll be like and I'd have to go back into that whole "Ummm... I'm not planning on getting married" thing with her. "I'm not planning on getting married" to her means I should be practicing celibacy. Yadda.
When I left the Oprah room to do my upper body, "Green-Eyed Lady" was on the radio. I hadn't heard that song in a long, long time. When there were no supervisors around at work, I'd call into the oldies station if we had it on and request that song. The guy always knew it was me. I love that song.
God DAMN, I feel like I've been writing for a long, long time.
I need friends. No one should type this much.