Heavy heart
Okay, so you probably already know my harddrive crashed yesterday, taking all 500+ of my lovely songs and 3 years worth of pictures (icons and banners) as well as 2 years of lovely photographs down with it. ):
Honestly, when I first realised it happened I was shocked beyond belief. Couldn't even cry at all, I just stared at the screen blankly, and I felt as though all the soul had been sucked out of me and I felt so hollow and empty I couldn't even feel myself anymore. Then I started to feel really really frustrated, because I had no idea how I'm going to get all those songs with album art and lyrics back, and even more so for my pictures and photographs. I can't even synchronise my iPod because all the songs'd be gone if I do that. ):
Anyway, I find it so paradoxical that just in the morning I was praising the world for being so beautiful and then all this shit suddenly happens to me and I find it so unbelievably surreal until I see all the exclaimation marks and messages popping up beside the song titles when I attempt to play them on iTunes.
Sigh, I feel really burned and the emptiness is really consuming me but I've calmed down. Looking at it from another perspective I guess it's a new start (argh but the memories of it all....) and at least I get to ultrafiltrate and selectively reabsorb my songs back (yes pun intended) and well... I received a pleasant surprise at a rather unearthly hour yesterday night and that sort of made me feel better. Yeah well, facing reality I guess I'll just start all over again. Mum's getting me a new CPU this week 'cause the one I have is (literally and figuratively) spluttering blood and practically lagging with every word i a m t y p i n g l i k e t h a t . . . .. .
Lastly, here's a shoutout to my beloved Sylvia: I can't thank you enough for what you're doing for me. Not just being there for me and listening to me rant and bearing with my chains of f-words and "i want to die (+ now srsly)" but for volunteering to compiling 300+ songs for me and lending me your thumbdrive so that I won't have to feel as though I lost everything, sending me 60 songs via email one by one for the entire afternoon when you could've spent that time studying instead of entertaining me and my empty heart. I don't even know how to thank you without sounding corny, playful or insincere. Really, I'm so grateful to have a friend like you, from the bottom of my heart, thanks so much for being there for me. ♥
On a happier, lighter note: LOVE DRUNK OUT TMR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ^^V