Learning to live.
So again it's been awhile.
I'm 28 now, and I don't feel older yet. But I feel like that will continue on for awhile. ;P
We've lived in Japan now 5 months, and I can clearly say the warfare of darkness is real here, one really has to be on their guard and in prayer, and in the Word.
Otherwise, you'll drown really fast, I think that happens anyway, but I feel like its more noticeable here.
I really am realizing my humanity really fast. If I didn't think I struggled before, I know it now.
But thankfully, I live in a community that wants to help and grow along with us, and won't leave us alone in the dark. We fight together, not alone. So I am thankful for that. The light exposes darkness, and the community gathered in the Spirit helps us grow and get out of these sins that so easily entangle us.
I really have realized how much I want to love Jesus more, and love others more, love the Japanese more.
Lately I've been so focused on being comfortable, and people noticing me, that I have forgotten how important it is for me to consider Jesus and consider others more. I lose sight real quickly when my eyes aren't first on the Lord and His beauty and radiance.
We had a Staff Conference really recently, asking God to bring breakthrough into our community, to be more others focused, and focused on the Lord. We fasted from being on devices for 3 days, and during those three days was my birthday, and that's when it REALLY hit me, that I really like being liked by people, and I enjoy people noticing me. And if there's a possibility that they don't, I get sad or resentful.
It's humbling, but it's true; I care far too much about being noticed by people, other Christians especially. I didn't realize that fully till more recently; through that experience. Now that I know that about myself, I know that I need to fight it; by diving more into the Word, and spending more time fully immersing myself into the reality of the Spirit's presence in my daily life.
So often, I forget He's RIGHT THERE. RIGHT HERE next to me. And that is the very thing the Japanese are struggling with, they don't REALIZE how close they are to the Father's heart.
Considering all these things, I realize my heart still has a ways to grow, and I want to live in that, never being satisfied, but always hungering more to know the depth of the love the Father has for us and for this world, and to give Him the Glory He deserves, by not holding back my heart, but reaching it out to be moved and crushed into what God has designed it to be.
I want to melt in His hands, and burn until I die.
Let it be Jesus, more and more and more of YOUR heart. I want to know His heart.
I'm 28 now, and I don't feel older yet. But I feel like that will continue on for awhile. ;P
We've lived in Japan now 5 months, and I can clearly say the warfare of darkness is real here, one really has to be on their guard and in prayer, and in the Word.
Otherwise, you'll drown really fast, I think that happens anyway, but I feel like its more noticeable here.
I really am realizing my humanity really fast. If I didn't think I struggled before, I know it now.
But thankfully, I live in a community that wants to help and grow along with us, and won't leave us alone in the dark. We fight together, not alone. So I am thankful for that. The light exposes darkness, and the community gathered in the Spirit helps us grow and get out of these sins that so easily entangle us.
I really have realized how much I want to love Jesus more, and love others more, love the Japanese more.
Lately I've been so focused on being comfortable, and people noticing me, that I have forgotten how important it is for me to consider Jesus and consider others more. I lose sight real quickly when my eyes aren't first on the Lord and His beauty and radiance.
We had a Staff Conference really recently, asking God to bring breakthrough into our community, to be more others focused, and focused on the Lord. We fasted from being on devices for 3 days, and during those three days was my birthday, and that's when it REALLY hit me, that I really like being liked by people, and I enjoy people noticing me. And if there's a possibility that they don't, I get sad or resentful.
It's humbling, but it's true; I care far too much about being noticed by people, other Christians especially. I didn't realize that fully till more recently; through that experience. Now that I know that about myself, I know that I need to fight it; by diving more into the Word, and spending more time fully immersing myself into the reality of the Spirit's presence in my daily life.
So often, I forget He's RIGHT THERE. RIGHT HERE next to me. And that is the very thing the Japanese are struggling with, they don't REALIZE how close they are to the Father's heart.
Considering all these things, I realize my heart still has a ways to grow, and I want to live in that, never being satisfied, but always hungering more to know the depth of the love the Father has for us and for this world, and to give Him the Glory He deserves, by not holding back my heart, but reaching it out to be moved and crushed into what God has designed it to be.
I want to melt in His hands, and burn until I die.
Let it be Jesus, more and more and more of YOUR heart. I want to know His heart.