Lost and feeling low
Well, quite frankly, I don*t wanna get into detail about my Baltimore trip for my own reasons. It was all around mostly amazing. But I just don*t wanna look back on some of it. But if you ask me about the concert I am glad to share. Everyone was pretty much amazing, except Good Charlotte. Ew. I found a new love = Citizen Cope :) Enough about that.
This week just really sucked. It was really short for some reason but I just have felt absolutely horrible. My brain is somewhere else. I can*t get it off a lot of stuff. It is just stuck in a jam. I have been playing and writing lots of music to help me get through the day okay. But I am in a situation that truly isn*t easy for me at all. But it is my fault, so I can*t blame it on anyone; but myself. I knew if everything turned on me it would be like this but sometimes things are going great & then randomly spin outta your hands. But people like Bonnie are really supporting me & that*s always nice. It*s one of those 'time will heal it' sorta things. I wish this all was so much easier because I am really trying to be strong & say, 'everything will be okay.' Yet of course things aren*t going back to normal. Well Friday, I was worn out & just stayed home & chilled out. This week went pretty fast even though I had lots of time cause I can*t do track cause of my hip. Yesterday was a great day actually. I woke up took the dog for a 30 min. walk & worked off some of the money my grandparents gave me for gardening. It was a nice cause it was beautiful out. Then Bon called to go to Lov'n Clay to paint pottery. We were there for 3 hrs. It was so much fun. We talked about everything & made art.. which is always cool. To broaden my horizons I went to church with her. It was interesting. I wrote lyrics the whole time. And it was good for writing 'cause I could write when I disagreed & agreed which was cool. But some people were scaring me. Afterwards we went to this woman*s house who is EXACTLY LIKE ME. She is the coolest & I am gonna start babysitting her daughter & cleaning for her & borrowing her stuff when I go out. I love my adventures with Bonnie. Today I felt like shit. I went & saw the new Will Ferrell movie. It was decent. And had a nice dinner. I hate not being able to run cause I feel already like I am getting chubbier & I am not even eating bad. Ugh.
I learned sooooo much on guitar this week.. I love it. And Coldplay is coming to Darien Lake. They were on SNL last night & it was great. Made me cry. 'Fix You' will always make me cry. I don*t wanna discuss why. X & Y comes out tomorrow :) Woo hoo.
I am gonna go be a geek & play guitar & read. School is almost over. Spring Fest is this week. 4 Day weekend. I guess I should keep my chin up then.
<3333jp