is tired.
Tomorrow I get to start chasing the tuition waiver across campus. I took some student loans to help offset the cost of moving to Lawrence but instead the university used those loans to pay the tuition I'm supposed have waived. According to the bursar's office, I have no waiver on file. I'm okay for now--bought that Lenovo S10-2 I've been so psyched about, finally got some bookshelves, shoes, and plan to order a couch from this website when I can.
I'm still a little nervous about school starting. I got my teaching schedule on Friday and I'm doing three fifty-minute classes back-to-back on Fridays. Three in a row is a lot to me. Three is a lot to me. I want to take some real classes but this semester I'm taking a lot of proseminar hours since I'm a noob.
Dyed my hair red again. It's strange. I haven't dyed it in so long I'd forgotten how and had to have Daniel's help. I tried to dye it two different colors but they look so similar that the colors look like a perfectly natural combination of strawberry blonde (in parts) and light auburn (in other parts). I might actually go to a salon and have my hair colored... on second thought, that's really expensive. Maybe I can try to dye the "light auburn" parts a "medium auburn"? Whatever. This is why I stopped dying my hair in the first place.
Daniel starts his two online classes tomorrow. I'm excited for him.
I still miss Gandhi so much. Sometimes I catch something out of the corner of my eye but it's usually a box or a yellow pillowcase. Sometimes I feel phantom vibrations on the bed and am stunned at how natural it is to assume little Mr. Gandhi has just hopped up. Like quitting smoking, actually, I've grown accustomed to the sudden tragedy of missing him. Instead of an ache that permeates my whole being, my grief is like a knife that cuts deeply and unexpectedly but instantly and momentarily. I feel like I can grab it and hold it close to me and breathe it for a moment; but then I feel okay about releasing it... for a while.
I'm still a little nervous about school starting. I got my teaching schedule on Friday and I'm doing three fifty-minute classes back-to-back on Fridays. Three in a row is a lot to me. Three is a lot to me. I want to take some real classes but this semester I'm taking a lot of proseminar hours since I'm a noob.
Dyed my hair red again. It's strange. I haven't dyed it in so long I'd forgotten how and had to have Daniel's help. I tried to dye it two different colors but they look so similar that the colors look like a perfectly natural combination of strawberry blonde (in parts) and light auburn (in other parts). I might actually go to a salon and have my hair colored... on second thought, that's really expensive. Maybe I can try to dye the "light auburn" parts a "medium auburn"? Whatever. This is why I stopped dying my hair in the first place.
Daniel starts his two online classes tomorrow. I'm excited for him.
I still miss Gandhi so much. Sometimes I catch something out of the corner of my eye but it's usually a box or a yellow pillowcase. Sometimes I feel phantom vibrations on the bed and am stunned at how natural it is to assume little Mr. Gandhi has just hopped up. Like quitting smoking, actually, I've grown accustomed to the sudden tragedy of missing him. Instead of an ache that permeates my whole being, my grief is like a knife that cuts deeply and unexpectedly but instantly and momentarily. I feel like I can grab it and hold it close to me and breathe it for a moment; but then I feel okay about releasing it... for a while.