The Ammendment of your life
When asked about that last entry, I couldn't remember what exactly set me off. Whether it was someone I know or some stupid customer at the 'Buy More'.
But I do know that a lot of the people I encounter in every day are really generally stupid. I know people, actual people, who honestly think Barack Obama would be our _3rd_ black president. What the fuck are our schools teaching? Obviously nothing... it's a crime what teachers make in a year and the FCAT and whatever other fucking state tests are shoved down their throats which in turn gets shoved down the kids throats all so the schools 'budget' can fill up a bit more... and does anyone honestly think all that extra 'budget' money goes to the school? the teachers? the students? Who benefits from that?
I see the new High School... sure, it looks nice and what not... the first building they built had like 12 class rooms... and and a ton of offices for the Administration. All nice new offices for Principal SitOnMyAss while the kids have to go to fucking portables. Why couldn't the administration building go into portables? We should be focusing on the kids anyways...
People also need to lay off the fucking rumors. If you have a problem with someone, tell them. Don't start shit behind their back. This town is so fucking small that gossip spreads like wildfire, and ya know what, that shit will hurt someone. Someone makes one small mistake, pisses someone else off, next thing you know the lies are out of control and that persons reputation gets hurt. Not cool.
Regardless what people think. I'm not very stupid. Some know that, but yet others thing I'm blissfully ignorant. How I fucking wish. I see the signs, I see the inconsistency. I'm not always right, but i'm never wrong... And it hurts when people I know try.
Another thing... I come off as a big asshole, but truth be told, I care so fucking much its not even funny. I've got so much shit going on in my life and so many things going on in my head that sometimes being 'normal' is a fucking chore... But I do all that because I also see the pain my friends go through, even when they don't talk about it. I put all my shit aside because my friends matter most to me.
I'm sure it can be said that i'm not a good friend... and I never claimed to be. I've let many people down, people that never did anything to me. I turned my back on others for dumb reasons. To those that do try to get ahold of my and it seems I have 'excuses'. It just means I'm probabaly too caught up in my own bullshit at that moment... by the time I fight my way out, I don't get back to people because I dunno what to even say... This mainly applies to people I don't talk too very often.
Some may take deep offense to this. Fine, Fuck 'em. Those who have some understanding of me... they'll know that this isn't intended as an insult.
No matter what I do... it's never enough. Sometimes I wish I was normal and naive like everyone else, but then stupid shit happens that makes me remember why I am the way I am. Why I lock everyone else out.
I've got this far on my own, I've survived this much... What do you possibly think you could add to this to help? What benefit do you represent?
Just back off... I don't need you.
It's just a bug in the system... I promise :-\
But I do know that a lot of the people I encounter in every day are really generally stupid. I know people, actual people, who honestly think Barack Obama would be our _3rd_ black president. What the fuck are our schools teaching? Obviously nothing... it's a crime what teachers make in a year and the FCAT and whatever other fucking state tests are shoved down their throats which in turn gets shoved down the kids throats all so the schools 'budget' can fill up a bit more... and does anyone honestly think all that extra 'budget' money goes to the school? the teachers? the students? Who benefits from that?
I see the new High School... sure, it looks nice and what not... the first building they built had like 12 class rooms... and and a ton of offices for the Administration. All nice new offices for Principal SitOnMyAss while the kids have to go to fucking portables. Why couldn't the administration building go into portables? We should be focusing on the kids anyways...
People also need to lay off the fucking rumors. If you have a problem with someone, tell them. Don't start shit behind their back. This town is so fucking small that gossip spreads like wildfire, and ya know what, that shit will hurt someone. Someone makes one small mistake, pisses someone else off, next thing you know the lies are out of control and that persons reputation gets hurt. Not cool.
Regardless what people think. I'm not very stupid. Some know that, but yet others thing I'm blissfully ignorant. How I fucking wish. I see the signs, I see the inconsistency. I'm not always right, but i'm never wrong... And it hurts when people I know try.
Another thing... I come off as a big asshole, but truth be told, I care so fucking much its not even funny. I've got so much shit going on in my life and so many things going on in my head that sometimes being 'normal' is a fucking chore... But I do all that because I also see the pain my friends go through, even when they don't talk about it. I put all my shit aside because my friends matter most to me.
I'm sure it can be said that i'm not a good friend... and I never claimed to be. I've let many people down, people that never did anything to me. I turned my back on others for dumb reasons. To those that do try to get ahold of my and it seems I have 'excuses'. It just means I'm probabaly too caught up in my own bullshit at that moment... by the time I fight my way out, I don't get back to people because I dunno what to even say... This mainly applies to people I don't talk too very often.
Some may take deep offense to this. Fine, Fuck 'em. Those who have some understanding of me... they'll know that this isn't intended as an insult.
No matter what I do... it's never enough. Sometimes I wish I was normal and naive like everyone else, but then stupid shit happens that makes me remember why I am the way I am. Why I lock everyone else out.
I've got this far on my own, I've survived this much... What do you possibly think you could add to this to help? What benefit do you represent?
Just back off... I don't need you.
It's just a bug in the system... I promise :-\