Poker Face Part II
Poker Face
Part 2
Naruto entered the club, looking around with mild interest as he followed Kiba through the crowd to the table their friends had reserved near the back. The loud booming music flowed with an addictive beat that seemed to demand the sultry swinging of hips, a demand that was being obeyed by several caged and tabletop dancers, all of whom seemed to be dancing in pairs in an effort to further raise the sexual energy of the dance floor.
Pouting a bit at the idea of couples, Naruto returned his attention to Kiba's back, which was currently sporadically moving to the music as he continued to lead the way.
Naruto hadn't intended on joining tonight, doing his best to keep his schedule as open as possible for Sasuke, just in case whatever had been keeping him busy these past few weeks would suddenly be canceled for one night - or even one hour.
They had been on several more casual dates since the first disastrous one, and Naruto was proud to say that Sasuke had finally loosened up to the point where he was once again comfortable around him.
Despite Sasuke's constant suspicion of Naruto being secretly disgusted that he was gay, Naruto could clearly tell that Sasuke had been the one more affected of the two of them. It was because of this that Naruto had kept their dates casual, trying to show Sasuke that things were still okay between them, even if they were trying to take it to another level.
Naruto was pretty sure he was bi at this point, but he wasn't sure if it was because he was just really horny thanks to being abstinent for over a month or if he was over thinking the male anatomy. He had come to the conclusion that he wouldn't know for sure until things started moving forward sexually for both him and Sasuke, something he was sure he wouldn't have too much of a problem with. Because Sasuke really was pretty, regardless of how much he hated the fact.
It wasn't as though Sasuke had lied; he just hadn't quite told the entire truth. When telling Naruto he didn't have time for a date, he had really been hinting towards the fact that he didn't have the energy to think about *them*. The idea was constantly gnawing away at him, and it had been, ever since that first date weeks previous. The date where he realized that Naruto and himself could really never be anything but close friends.
Any normal person would have said they were perfect for each other, and Sasuke wouldn't hesitate to agree. But without each other...Sasuke knew that Naruto had realized it too, somewhere along the way. They had a bond, something they couldn't find anything to compare to. And as their casual dates had continued, Sasuke had come to understand something.
Whether Naruto knew it or not, the only reason he was continuing these charades was because he knew he couldn't lose Sasuke. Just like Sasuke knew he couldn't lose Naruto. Just like he knew the only way he could get away from the entrapment he felt was to simply escape to the things he knew best; the people and places he knew all too well.
A man came up behind him and Sasuke soured when a hand came to rest on his hip, sweaty, the smell of aged wheat beer and salted nuts making him don his trademark glare. "If you know what's good for you, you'll understand what I mean by saying you're not my type."
The man raised an eyebrow as if pretending not to hear a word from Sasuke's lips over the loud music that pulsated around them, but something passed through Sasuke's eyes that made him quickly understand. He wanted someone blond, he thought mutely, feeling agitated at himself for calling off another date with Naruto, simply to be here, looking for a night where he could think of anyone but.
No matter how much it pained him to admit it, everything made him think of Naruto. He didn't just want someone blond, he wanted someone he couldn't have. Someone who would soon decide to call off their casual dating so that their friendship could return to normal.
He could manage that much, as long as Naruto always remained by him, true to himself. It was a sacrifice he was willing to make.
At the uproarious cheer of his and Kiba's arrival, Naruto offered a large grin, and waved to the numerous faces he hadn't seen outside of campus for quite a while.
"See, I told you this'd be a good idea," Kiba slugged him on the back, while slyly taking a fruity drink from the hands of a pretty blonde girl seated at their bottle-service table. He sipped a little and she giggled when he handed it back to her. "Sweet drink with a sweet girl. I like, I like."
Turning back to Naruto he grinned. "There's nothing like a good ol' bump-and-grind to get a man back into shape," he said, a hint of promise in his tone.
Naruto schooled his face into a pouting glare. "Just because I haven't been out and about every night like you guys doesn’t mean I'm not getting any."
Laughter and hooting calls sounded around them.
After a loud cackle escaped from Kiba's throat, the brunet ruffled Naruto's hair. "Yes, yes it does. Especially because you've been spending so much time with...what's his name? That Asian guy that doesn't know any English."
The blond girl from the table went wide-eyed. "You’re helping a foreign exchange student? That's so sweet!" It was obvious she was already tipsy.
Despite the teasing air, the punch Naruto delivered to Kiba's arm was hard enough to hurt. "His name is Sasuke, you dick, and he's been my best friend since 8th grade." Grabbing a beer from a full platter that was magically set on the table in the middle of everyone, Naruto took a drink before continuing. "And he speaks English just fine. He just doesn't like you."
There was a slight delay before Kiba grimaced, rubbing his arm hard. The people at the table who heard laughed heartily at the abuse. Suddenly, Kiba's eyes got wide.
"He doesn't like me? How could he not?"
He looked bewildered and put his arm around the shoulders of another girl at the table. "You still love me, don't you?" his puppy dog eyes sparkled and she laughed before pecking his cheek.
Looking satisfied in his work, Kiba smirked up at Naruto.
Naruto chuckled, rolling his eyes and turning his attention out to the dance floor to assess the crowd at this still somewhat decent hour.
The place was fairly packed thanks to it being a Friday night, plus the fact that it had recently been featured in some big name national magazine. Naruto felt lucky that his friends had thought to get reservations early on so they wouldn't have to worry about the line that had been rapidly growing longer when he had first arrived.
The dress code seemed to run on the risqué side of upper class, and Naruto found himself wondering if this was the type of place Sasuke used to come to for his one night stands.
That thought process came to a slow halt as he spotted someone who looked just like Sasuke out on the dance floor, enthusiastically grinding hips with another blond man.
As Naruto continued to watch out of morbid curiosity for homosexuality (a habit he had developed after he had started watching gay porn), he came to realize that the man on the dance floor was Sasuke. He couldn't see his face clearly, nor did he have any idea how Sasuke danced, but he could tell that was his best friend based on the way he simply carried himself through his moves.
The bottom of Naruto's stomach felt as if it had disappeared as he continued to watch this side of Sasuke, this side that he was pretty sure he was never meant to see.
He felt strange tonight. He couldn't bring himself to open his eyes, though he was sure he could feel eyes on him. Not that it was a foreign feeling. His figure was good and he was Japanese, so he seemed to attract attention like some exotic creature wherever he decided to let loose. But this time the feeling was different.
His skin felt cooled suddenly, even though he was curving into his partner with enough force to break a sweat. His eyes broke open suddenly though and he felt like rolling his eyes.
Why was it that *everywhere* he went he saw Naruto? He closed his eyes, and there he was. He would open them, and there he'd be. And now, like a ghost, Naruto was staring at him from across the club.
Was this his conscience? It had to be. His heart beat a bit faster and he had to repeat his mantra of 'it's all for the best', hoping the apparition would vanish.
But it didn't go away.
Instead, it grew paler. The way a person did when someone punched them in the stomach. The way someone did when they found someone important to them doing something horribly unexpected.
The way Naruto would look if he caught Sasuke in a club, body wound tight around a stranger.
It was then that Sasuke realized it wasn't an apparition at all.
Naruto turned his head away, fighting back the nauseas feeling that was stirring in his gut.
He didn't understand it. He thought things had been going great between them. Sasuke had even gone into this with the admittance that he could and would never play games where Naruto was involved. But if this wasn't some game, then what was it?
Putting the beer down on the table, Naruto sent a pleading glance towards Kiba who was looking at him with concern, probably from having seen the entire change in his countenance over the past minute. Motioning a thumb towards the entrance, Naruto mouthed out that he was leaving and thankfully Kiba nodded, his face showing his confusion despite accepting the circumstances.
Running a hand through his hair, Naruto weaved his way through the crowd, the sudden adrenaline rush urging him to move faster, to run if possible, just to get out of the club and away from what he had seen on the dance floor that much quicker.
He wasn't too sure if he had obeyed such urges, finding himself outside without much memory of how he got there as the cool night air hit his face, the dream-like feeling he was in intensified by the fact that his ears had dulled the noise of the world around him after being put through the abuse of the loud speakers from inside.
Moving aside as a group was permitted entrance, he remained where he was for a moment before deciding his destination was home. He wasn't familiar enough with the area to just walk back to his apartment, but he could vaguely recall seeing a subway entrance a few blocks back from the car ride with Kiba earlier.
Heading in the direction he assumed was right, he allowed his mind to puzzle over just why Sasuke would be wrapped around some stranger when they were supposed to be together.
Did Sasuke no longer like him? That would explain why he suddenly had such a busy schedule despite his anti-social tendencies. But then why wouldn't he just come out and tell him? Maybe that was his new boyfriend?
Maybe Sasuke had an evil twin?
Naruto debated on calling Sasuke in hopes of proving this second theory.
Sasuke rubbed his wrist, biting back the urge to go back inside and deck the man who had attempted to refuse to let him leave. He was pretty sure it would bruise at the vice grip his dancing partner had given him, but fortunately, Sasuke was a man who could handle himself.
And now...he had to do just that.
Naruto had seen him.
Sasuke didn't understand it. Naruto never went to clubs, never went to *his* clubs at least, and now...he wasn't sure what he felt. Numb was the only word that stuck to his tongue and lips. His whole body, his mind--even his breathing was shallow as he ducked outside, trying to find Naruto's familiar figure on the street.
He glanced back and forth wildly until he caught sight of Naruto rounding a corner quite a ways away. Sasuke paused before bolting after him.
Wasn't this what he had wanted? For Naruto to realize it couldn't work?
But if that was the case, Sasuke didn't understand why he felt like someone was choking every emotion out of him. Like he had been cheating...in a relationship he had convinced himself didn't exist between them.
He didn't know what to do. Would Naruto forgive him? Did he want to be forgiven?
Sasuke was shaking in his split second decision making. Tearing his vision to the direction Naruto had been a minute before, Sasuke shot forward, racing as fast as he could manage.
He dodged a few people before turning the corner onto a nearly empty street that lead to the subway station. He recognized it because he had taken the subway home on occasion after long nights out on the town. Most everyone was coming to the downtown strip however, and few people were leaving.
Which left Sasuke slowing his pace, coming to terms that Naruto really was only about 20 feet ahead of him. His throat was dry. It was odd, because Sasuke never froze up. But now, he couldn't even bring himself to do anything.
It probably had something to do with the expression on Naruto's face. And the fact he was responsible for it.
"Naruto..." he said, but the word was so soft he barely heard it himself. The subway was coming and Naruto was moving towards it, and adrenaline suddenly made Sasuke shuffle forward.
In less that five seconds he was in front of Naruto, blocking his entrance to the subway car.
"You're not leaving," he said quickly. It was all he could think to say. His world was crumbling around him.
Naruto nearly jumped at the sudden appearance of Sasuke right in front of him. Unfortunately no surprise showed through the mask his face had slipped into in the few minutes it had taken for him to get to the subway station.
He stared blankly at the one before him for several seconds, all of his thoughts being washed away by the swirl of emotions that was bombarding him at the sight of a sweaty, panting Sasuke, looking at him with a looking that borderline desperation. The look didn't penetrate past the hurt, confusion and betrayal that was pounding through Naruto.
Shaking his head and scoffing, Naruto broke eye contact and moved to walk around Sasuke.
"Please don't leave."
Even thought the adrenaline was still forcing its way through Sasuke's veins, his limbs refused to move. For the first time in his life since his parents had passed away, he felt like he had no control. If Naruto wanted to leave, if he wanted to go...
...Sasuke would fall apart.
He didn't understand how, or why, or what was even going through his head. His chin lowered to his chest and he felt all of his insecurities blanket him again; he realized he was trembling.
"Please, Naruto..." he said, his eyes clenching closed, afraid to let Naruto’s back be the last memory he would have of him. "Please don't."
Naruto's eyes narrowed in sudden annoyance as he turned to look at Sasuke's trembling back. "Why? I didn't mean to interrupt your busy evening. See? I even left so things wouldn't be awkward."
This hiss of the train's doors closing drew Naruto's attention back to the cars and his jaw clenched as the train began to move forward without him on it. So much for his quick escape.
Taking a deep breath for patience, Naruto turned so that he was fully facing Sasuke, flinching a bit as the mental image of Sasuke's form moving so fluidly with another flashed through his memory.
Naruto hadn't gotten on the subway.
That was the only thought that kept running through Sasuke's mind as his eyes opened, but he wasn't greeted with the usual brilliant grin or clever smirk. Naruto's expression was one Sasuke had never seen, and it hurt him even more close up.
So did his words.
"Why are you mad at me?" Was the wining question he came up with. He didn't know why Naruto was so upset when they weren't even *really* together. When Naruto was simply sacrificing his sexuality for the sake of his confused and apparently needy best friend. He didn't get it.
The question floored Naruto and he truly found himself wondering if he was in fact facing Sasuke's evil twin.
"Why-?" Naruto's eyes were wide as he realized it wasn't a rhetorical question. "You're serious? You want to know *why* I'm mad at you?"
Sasuke's composure came back a little when he started feeling defensive against Naruto's tone.
"Yeah...You--You don't even like me," he pointed out, raising an eyebrow and shaking his head.
Naruto's expression grew dangerous. "Coming from the one who's been cheating on me, that's really rich." He crossed his arms. "Why'd you chase me?" he shot back, more convinced than ever that this person before him wasn't really Sasuke.
"Because you--" Sasuke cut himself off, his voice rising. "What do you want from me? I just--You just keep leading me on and on and on and it’s not fair!" Sasuke ran a hand through his hair and pressed his palm to his forehead, trying to manage the thoughts in his head.
These casual dates...these countless 'casual' dates...for what? For nothing? For Sasuke to try and pretend that maybe, if Naruto actually *wanted* to be with him, this is what their relationship might be like?
Naruto frowned as his jaw fell open. An accusing finger jumped up as his patience flew out the window.
"What?!? Are you even listening to yourself??" he shouted. "I want you! That's what I want from you, and that's what I thought you wanted from me too! What's there to lead on from?!"
Sasuke glared at Naruto from underneath his wrist. It fell from his forehead limply.
"Are you listening to yourself?" he corrected. "You only wanted to date me because you felt sorry for me. And then you decide to do it casually, when you even told me that 'casual dating doesn't count'."
Sasuke continued to stare at Naruto, feeling satisfied in some morbid way that they were both finally letting off steam. It felt like it had been a long time coming.
He paced for a minute before whipping back to Naruto. "And you say you want me? What exactly do you want? Because I can guarantee you don't know the half of what I want and have been wanting from you," he challenged, his breathing uneven as he struggled against his frustration.
"Bullshit!" Naruto barked, pride getting the best of him. "From what I saw back at the club just now, there's no way you want me even half as much as I want you! And why the hell would I feel sorry for you! You probably have more sex than myself and Kiba combined and it does TOO count!" he yelled, abruptly changing topics as his brain subconsciously filed through everything Sasuke had just said. "How the hell was I supposed to know you were ready for more when you've only just recently stopped acting like a terrified rabbit around me all the time?! Shit, I've been trying to go on a real date with you for the past TWO weeks!"
The fight suddenly left Naruto and his shoulders slumped. "I just don't get why you didn't tell me you changed your mind about me," he said brokenly. "I mean, you've never been one to dance around like this and you promised you'd never play games like this with me..."
"I haven't had sex since we started dating," and against Sasuke's better judgement, he used his fingers to create quotes around the word. "It wasn't my responsibility to tell you I wanted more; you already knew. I was the one waiting for you. I've always been the one waiting for you."
There was a brief second of silence before Sasuke mellowed too, leaning back against the subways directional map and pocketing his cold hands. "I've never played games with you. I was..." how to say it, "...just waiting for you to tell me you didn't want this."
His eyes narrowed again, remembering Naruto's earlier words and feeling like he hadn't quite retorted strongly enough towards them. "And don't talk to me like I'm loose or something. I'm not."
He was actually really hurt by that comment, and couldn't look Naruto in the eye.
Naruto snorted. "And what? This is how you pass the time while waiting?" The accusation was immediately followed by an apology. "I'm sorry, that was uncalled for." He sighed, trying to sort things out in his head. "What makes you think I wouldn't want this?"
Sasuke's face soured, even with Naruto's apology. "Why would I think you want this, or me? You're straight, for Christ's sake. You don't have to keep pretending you're not just because you're afraid to hurt my feelings!"
"What? When have I ever been afraid of hurting your feelings? And why are you so Hell-bent on me being straight?! Is that your way of telling yourself that this is okay?" he asked, an arm waving back in the general direction of the club before fingers came up to cruelly mimic Sasuke's earlier air quotes. "That us 'dating' is just some illusion for my stupid American brain to sit pretty in?"
"Can you at least try and see this from my point of view?" Sasuke's eyes narrowed, not liking the way his friend was implying that Sasuke thought he was stupid.
"I'm sorry. I messed up. I never realized you developed feelings for me, or that whatever we have somehow turned into a real relationship. But honestly..."
Sasuke wasn't good at expressing himself, and he hated, worse than that, explaining himself.
"Naruto, I haven't just liked you for years. I've lo--I've really cared. I don't want you to not be here one day. And what's worse...what's worse for me, is for you to not be here, and for me to remember what it was like to 'date' you. What I could have had, but never can have. I can't do that. I...just can't."
Naruto looked like he wanted to speak, but Sasuke kept going. "It wasn't nice of you to put me into a position where I couldn't choose. You said 'casual', you said you wanted to 'try it out'...I just...Damnit. Have you even thought once about what that meant to me?"
Looking down at the dirty cement, Naruto felt beyond guilty for putting Sasuke through such emotions when all he had thought about was making him happy instead. Rubbing the back of his neck, Naruto looked off to the side, feeling he should choose his next words carefully.
"You're an idiot."
At Sasuke's completely offended and incredulous look, Naruto continued. "I told myself going into this that we would be a destined couple once we kissed. Well, we not only kissed, but I saw you naked, too, and I'm still here. If things were meant to end, they would have done so right away. Your insecurities are stupid."
Sasuke wanted to argue but he couldn't find the willpower to. "Even if they are, I still have them. And we didn't kiss, I licked alcohol off your lips. And...I certainly don't remember being naked with you." Even though his comment was full of a smitten curiosity, Sasuke still looked and felt completely tormented.
Naruto scowled. "It was a kiss and your nakedness was sexy," he said stubbornly before taking a few steps forward and hesitating. "You know you're my most important person, right?"
Sasuke stared at Naruto for a moment longer, but his expression softened into something that mirrored guilt. His eyes fell half-mast, and he wasn't sure how to respond. Now, in the face of hearing words he had never imagined he would hear, all he could remember was how many times he had turned down dates the past week, and how many late nights he had pulled trying to forget about them.
"I really didn't sleep with anyone, I swear..." his voice wasn't stern like it usually was; instead it was shaky.
Naruto let out a breath that could have been either a sigh or a chuckle, before reaching his arms out. "Come here," he instructed.
Rather than embracing Sasuke in a hug as he probably expected, Naruto placed one hand on his cheek, the other circling around to comb into black, gelled locks as he guided in forward, their lips mashing as Naruto shifted into a more comfortable stance before tilting his head to kiss Sasuke properly.
Sasuke felt the wind rush from his stomach, leaving him breathless and surprised, and amazingly enough, sated. His hands were only hanging at his side for a second before they found their way to Naruto's hips, and he tugged forward, crushing their bodies together.
His eyes were closed by now and his brain had finally stopped thinking. It was simply interested in doing. He twisted his head to the side to catch Naruto's lower lip between his lips, kissing it softly as he pulled away and let his head fall to rest in the gentle curve of Naruto's neck.
Arms shifted so that he was fully holding Sasuke as Naruto buried his head into the small juncture just below Sasuke's jaw. "Does this kiss count?" he asked, feeling a little breathless at Sasuke's obvious skill.
Sasuke smiled and hot breath brushed against Naruto's skin, and really, that was as close to a laugh that anyone was going to get out of him tonight.
"I think..." he started, pulling away slightly to look into Naruto's eyes. "I think I'll date you for real now," he offered.
A genuine smile slowly made its way over Naruto's face. "It's about time," he said happily. "You'll have to wait a while, though. My schedule will be unexpectedly busy for the next few weeks..." he joked.
Sasuke frowned and pushed Naruto away from him lightly, turning back towards the club district. "In that case, I have someone to go apologize to," he took a step away from Naruto and turned, eyebrow raised. "Or maybe you can pencil me in for tonight?"
Naruto reached out and grabbed Sasuke's sleeve to stop him from leaving. "What do you have in mind for tonight?"
Sasuke turned and ran his middle and forefinger up Naruto's chest until he finally slid his arm around Naruto's neck, drawing himself closer, an invisible gravity pulling them together.
"I was thinking some roleplay," he chanced. "You can be the straight guy I manage to turn gay," he stared, searching Naruto's eyes for approval.
"I dunno, I'm feeling pretty gay right now," Naruto admitted, the heat swirling in his belly beginning to grow distracting.
Sasuke smiled, that rare and genuine one that only Naruto got to see, and pulled himself back, grabbing Naruto's wrist and pulling him forward. The next ride had arrived; he had heard it moments before, and it was becoming a bit too cold to linger outside.
"Come on," he said and the warm rush of the muggy compartment was welcomed in comparison to the coolness outside. Sasuke grabbed one of the steady-polls and looped back around, bringing his face to Naruto's again.
"I just want to keep kissing you." he said flatly.
"Why? Was the first one not good enou-mph!" Naruto decided maybe it was time to shut up as the train started to move, causing him to surge forward and meet Sasuke's already-waiting lips in another heated kiss, a shiver running through his body as tongues were quickly added, not giving him a chance to properly taste Sasuke's bottom lip.
Naruto found he didn't really mind as their tongues eagerly danced around each other, his pulse quickening as his fingers traced out the smooth contours of Sasuke's neck and jawline.
"If you say..." Sasuke managed between light sweeps of his tongue, "...something stupid..." he pecked Naruto's lips lightly and opened his eyes to show he was serious, "...like 'you're pretty', I'll stop," it was a warning if Naruto ever heard one.
Sasuke didn't stop though, he merely pulled Naruto closer, the bar between them feeling good against his thighs and hips since he didn't want to push for too much tonight. He was actually more than surprised that Naruto seemed to be craving him as much as Sasuke craved Naruto...it was a pleasant surprise.
He felt heated and overwhelmed, but somehow more in control of the situation than he cared to admit. He guessed that's what happened when you really cared for someone. Sex wasn't quick and pointless. It meant something. It was something that could wait.
Naruto tilted his head down a bit so that he could pull his lips away even as the kiss seemed to continue. "But.." he trailed off a bit as he saw that Sasuke's eyes were open again, clearly telling him to stop talking if he valued his life.
Naruto didn't heed the threat.
"...You are pretty."
"And you're still an idiot," Sasuke sighed, unwrapping his arms from Naruto in order to go and sit peacefully and very anti-sexually on one of the subway seats. He licked his lips, relishing the taste of his newest conquest; the one that would hopefully last forever.