I SEE 6.8Billion Luminous Eggs and Freaking Electric Butterfly: A Reflection on Past Experience
DESPAIR-“Then listen, not to dulcet harmony, But to a discord wrung by mad despair Out of this bosom's depths of bitterness, to ease my heart and plant a sting in thine.”
--Cervantes
Vomit!
Brain vomit.
I’m alone, poor, miserable and work for my death.
My life, just like everyone else’s, is to be a fucking train wreck of random gene smashing and working to die.
Bereft of ambition I find myself languishing in ennui!
Gone is the beautiful landscape that was supposed to keep this metaphysical gun from my feeble temple.
All I see now is the filthy, dusty inside of some cluttered room…
sucking in the stink of human decay through my half clogged nostrils.
NOW IS THE WINTER OF MY DISCONTENT, MOTHERFUCKER!
And why?
There’s no reason… none at all… and I think that’s the reason in and of itself. I miss something… its absence fills me.
METEMPSYCHOSIS-“Why should we make account of time, or of magnitude, or of figure? The soul knows them not, and genius, obeying its law, knows how to play with them as a young child plays with graybeards and in churches. Genius studies the causal thought, and far back in the womb of things sees the rays parting from one orb, that diverge, ere they fall, by infinite diameters. Genius watches the monad through all his masks as he performs the metempsychosis of nature.”
--Emerson
I fell into a coma the other day,
I realized a few things,
Science has driven me insane,
Intermittent waves of severe depression were coupled with extreme hope,
For so long I have stopped seeing art, stopped seeing people, beauty, trees, shapes, colors and emotions.
I saw only waves reflecting, deflecting, and vexing all over voluminous and varying forms of mass.
I felt only chemical reactions and shifts in pressure.
Then I realized and have determined to reach for only one thing,
A simpler ideology and time when the world was spirit and mystery,
To forget science and SEE art, red, ochre, shades, parasols, ugliness, beauty, and to feel, feel feel feel feel feel feel feel EVERYTHING,
To think but to not THINK, to be ever appreciative of this experience,
But not to stifle it, not to rationalize it, or corral it into something that can be understood,
VATICINATION--EPILOGUE
The earth demigoddess rose from across the wicked horizon,
Disseminating her saving light through the blackness,
The maiden of love and light bled her freaking beauty over the industrial wreckage that cluttered that wicked horizon,
Her soul burst into a thousand psychedelic electric butterflies
Pure blues
The sunrise!
--Cervantes
Vomit!
Brain vomit.
I’m alone, poor, miserable and work for my death.
My life, just like everyone else’s, is to be a fucking train wreck of random gene smashing and working to die.
Bereft of ambition I find myself languishing in ennui!
Gone is the beautiful landscape that was supposed to keep this metaphysical gun from my feeble temple.
All I see now is the filthy, dusty inside of some cluttered room…
sucking in the stink of human decay through my half clogged nostrils.
NOW IS THE WINTER OF MY DISCONTENT, MOTHERFUCKER!
And why?
There’s no reason… none at all… and I think that’s the reason in and of itself. I miss something… its absence fills me.
METEMPSYCHOSIS-“Why should we make account of time, or of magnitude, or of figure? The soul knows them not, and genius, obeying its law, knows how to play with them as a young child plays with graybeards and in churches. Genius studies the causal thought, and far back in the womb of things sees the rays parting from one orb, that diverge, ere they fall, by infinite diameters. Genius watches the monad through all his masks as he performs the metempsychosis of nature.”
--Emerson
I fell into a coma the other day,
I realized a few things,
Science has driven me insane,
Intermittent waves of severe depression were coupled with extreme hope,
For so long I have stopped seeing art, stopped seeing people, beauty, trees, shapes, colors and emotions.
I saw only waves reflecting, deflecting, and vexing all over voluminous and varying forms of mass.
I felt only chemical reactions and shifts in pressure.
Then I realized and have determined to reach for only one thing,
A simpler ideology and time when the world was spirit and mystery,
To forget science and SEE art, red, ochre, shades, parasols, ugliness, beauty, and to feel, feel feel feel feel feel feel feel EVERYTHING,
To think but to not THINK, to be ever appreciative of this experience,
But not to stifle it, not to rationalize it, or corral it into something that can be understood,
VATICINATION--EPILOGUE
The earth demigoddess rose from across the wicked horizon,
Disseminating her saving light through the blackness,
The maiden of love and light bled her freaking beauty over the industrial wreckage that cluttered that wicked horizon,
Her soul burst into a thousand psychedelic electric butterflies
Pure blues
The sunrise!