nothing
it never gets better..i swear. just when you think you have hit a mile stone in your relationship. when you think you have come to the point where its...stay together and work hard...or separate and move on alone...you hit that wall. where it doesnt matter which way you go..life still fucking SUCKS everything it has out of you. Why does it have to be so hard. Why didnt i just stay in school...why did i let what i wanted get in the way of what i needed to do. Im miserable. Im so inlove...yet so horribly stuck in the worst rut i have ever been in. Money...is non-existant. Im embarassed that i cant even call my best friend and ask her out to coffee to celebrate her engagement..because i cant even fucking pay for my own. Im sick of hearing "i hate my life" from mike. i feel like he hates the fact that im thrown in there, in the mix as well.. things suck. merlins starting to spray..i need to pay for him to be fixed. i called a bunch of different places and its like $220-300 to get it done....i almost feel like i should just give my cats away.. i mean they might be happier somewhere else. i dont even know. catie just called my phone..i wanted to pick up...but how do i explain to her the fact that im not doing good here..im sad, im pissed off..im broke as fuck and im absolutly sick of living...music...music music music...why isnt it making me happy anymore? I can sing and sing till my face turns blue...but nothing happens. Im not rich...i dont have the money to take every fucking night off work to make my bills...im going to have to stop the band thing. Im gunna have to work another job...i have to survive and unfortunitly this AMERICA is designed so that you constantly OWE money...unless you were born into a shit load of it...and even then..they take as many taxes out as they can...nothing is free. nothing...nothing but my voice. and hell...latly it doesnt even calm ME down..how should it help others. how am i supposed to keep going like this when i cant afford to take a moment to myself to think...nothing is making sence to me. nothing is...working. nothing
i am nothing
i have done nothing with myself
i remain nothing to alot of people
and as much as i wish for it not to be true..i know this is why god didnt let me have our baby...Im not fit to be a mother anymore then the next" nothing"..........
he was right when he said that. Nothing is me
i am nothing
i have done nothing with myself
i remain nothing to alot of people
and as much as i wish for it not to be true..i know this is why god didnt let me have our baby...Im not fit to be a mother anymore then the next" nothing"..........
he was right when he said that. Nothing is me