A tearful goodbye
While all of you are taking this Ball prank very hard, I must remind you that no one had a word on them that was at all surprising.
Oh, yes, and I am leaving. Glorious, isn't it?
I was offered a post at Durmstrang and I have decided to take it rather than waste my talents on ingrates such as the students at Hogwarts. There is no cause or excuse for your behavior and ignorance. You're all terrible at Defense Against the Dark Arts, with the exception of a few prodigies who I will greatly miss.
While I could very well continue being candid about the students without fear of being fired, I won't waste any more energy telling you what you all can read yourselves when you look in the mirror.
For my colleagues (save Professor Dumbledore, who is a friend and a gentleman) who don't have that convenience, I will say only this: you're wankers and you don't know a bloody thing.
Good day.