(no subject)
some say the caliber of a man can be measured in how he reacts to hardship. there are some who measure a man by his accomplishments and some by their possessions. some people measure a man by the size of his truck. the man i admire most is the man who has no interest in measuring anyone else and only interest in measuring and bettering himself.
my chandelier is dim. i am smoking a fantastic cigar, drinking a delicious sierra nevada. the smell of nag champa fills my room with an essence both soothing and inspiring. i am listening to hendrix bleed. i myself am ready to bleed.
i take it as it comes. theres no other way that makes sense to me. i try to learn from what i see because the wisest teacher you will ever have is the world around you. i am not afraid of much. i would rather die than be seriously injured.
i love to express my feelings. i am also cautious in expressing my feelings, you never know who you are going to offend and you never know how deep you might slip.
i have learned quite a bit this past year. much more than i could relay in some silly survey, let alone a single document. i can tell you who i am, who i want to be and what i want to do, but that will require a cup of coffee and some decent weather.
i lost a really good friend a few days ago. tyson is my buddy man. his physical presence has left us. everything is everything, and i know he is with me now as much as he was when he was alive, but fucking shit, i am going to miss seeing him and the excellent high fives he always laid down on me.
tyson is about taking it easy. tyson helped coin the phrase 'i feel good about feeling good'.
he is the el camino just as much as i am just as much as you are. a man-measuring man would have been confused with tyson. he lived with his parents, went to community college, and had no truck. but if you ever got to see the man, you got the vibe that he was living it up like you wish you could.
death is very interesting to me.
(at this point, the cigar is out. a camel has replaced its intensity and it will be saved for another time)
death could be the end of everything that we know. i have no clue what death is. i only know the effect it has on those who are alive. i know that when most people think of death, it is all negative.
that is understandable. death is the ultimate loss. i am no stranger to death. i have lost before and i know what it is like. with tyson's death, i have tried to experience all angles of emotion.
when somebody close to you dies, you enter a state of being that i wouldn't call enlightenment but maybe something else close to it. the people that you you usually converse with in a very primitive manner are now opening their hearts and their minds to share their loss. conversations carry a heavier connotation, sad or not. your thought process is expanded. it shakes you out of the robotic state that most people live their lives in and you the shock of real human emotion can be too much for most. how many times in your average day do you diagnose the quality of your life and the caliber of a person that you are.
my thoughts and my feelings are clear. the stress of work, bills, school, art and love are not my entire life. my heart and mind realize these stresses are a part of life and that there are things happening all the time that are so much more important than what i do to survive. i am aware that life is not a race or competition. life is not finding yourself but building yourself. it is a new goal of mine to prolong this elevated consciousness as long as i can. i think if a person can live their life in touch with their true emotions, desires, and set of beliefs, that person can do no wrong.
my second beer has been cracked. the insence still burns but the camel is long gone. i just heart a line from a flaming lips song 'love is the greatest thing a heart can know, but the hole that it leaves in its absence can make you feel so low' i really like these guys.
i am disappointed in the way language is used in this world that we live in. i am not one to talk, my grammar is horrible and my vocabulary trite.
what i mean is that the words that are said the most have nothing to do with real communication and more to do with tangible objects and survival. the definitions of compassion, understanding, sharing (not profit sharing), care, pride, integrity, love (not disney love), respect, and passion have been pushed aside for the use of words that communicate profitability, net gain, cost-benefit analysis, greed, jealousy, bad and good credit, net worth (the idea of measuring somebody by their belongings seems so un-humanistic to me), servitude, and patriotism (which now means that in order to be patriotic, you must blindly follow whatever elected puppet 'rules' our country). please use your vocabulary to tell me how your day was with more than three words. use your knowledge to describe with all the passion in your heart what you want to be doing with the beautiful existence you have come across. let me know how you feel about me and let me know what you want to eat, because i am down for whatever.
if i have anything that i want to lay down on anybody else it it this: i live with passion and compassion, and i think you should too. and the second thing is if you are not ready for the first, than just be kind.
my chandelier is dim. i am smoking a fantastic cigar, drinking a delicious sierra nevada. the smell of nag champa fills my room with an essence both soothing and inspiring. i am listening to hendrix bleed. i myself am ready to bleed.
i take it as it comes. theres no other way that makes sense to me. i try to learn from what i see because the wisest teacher you will ever have is the world around you. i am not afraid of much. i would rather die than be seriously injured.
i love to express my feelings. i am also cautious in expressing my feelings, you never know who you are going to offend and you never know how deep you might slip.
i have learned quite a bit this past year. much more than i could relay in some silly survey, let alone a single document. i can tell you who i am, who i want to be and what i want to do, but that will require a cup of coffee and some decent weather.
i lost a really good friend a few days ago. tyson is my buddy man. his physical presence has left us. everything is everything, and i know he is with me now as much as he was when he was alive, but fucking shit, i am going to miss seeing him and the excellent high fives he always laid down on me.
tyson is about taking it easy. tyson helped coin the phrase 'i feel good about feeling good'.
he is the el camino just as much as i am just as much as you are. a man-measuring man would have been confused with tyson. he lived with his parents, went to community college, and had no truck. but if you ever got to see the man, you got the vibe that he was living it up like you wish you could.
death is very interesting to me.
(at this point, the cigar is out. a camel has replaced its intensity and it will be saved for another time)
death could be the end of everything that we know. i have no clue what death is. i only know the effect it has on those who are alive. i know that when most people think of death, it is all negative.
that is understandable. death is the ultimate loss. i am no stranger to death. i have lost before and i know what it is like. with tyson's death, i have tried to experience all angles of emotion.
when somebody close to you dies, you enter a state of being that i wouldn't call enlightenment but maybe something else close to it. the people that you you usually converse with in a very primitive manner are now opening their hearts and their minds to share their loss. conversations carry a heavier connotation, sad or not. your thought process is expanded. it shakes you out of the robotic state that most people live their lives in and you the shock of real human emotion can be too much for most. how many times in your average day do you diagnose the quality of your life and the caliber of a person that you are.
my thoughts and my feelings are clear. the stress of work, bills, school, art and love are not my entire life. my heart and mind realize these stresses are a part of life and that there are things happening all the time that are so much more important than what i do to survive. i am aware that life is not a race or competition. life is not finding yourself but building yourself. it is a new goal of mine to prolong this elevated consciousness as long as i can. i think if a person can live their life in touch with their true emotions, desires, and set of beliefs, that person can do no wrong.
my second beer has been cracked. the insence still burns but the camel is long gone. i just heart a line from a flaming lips song 'love is the greatest thing a heart can know, but the hole that it leaves in its absence can make you feel so low' i really like these guys.
i am disappointed in the way language is used in this world that we live in. i am not one to talk, my grammar is horrible and my vocabulary trite.
what i mean is that the words that are said the most have nothing to do with real communication and more to do with tangible objects and survival. the definitions of compassion, understanding, sharing (not profit sharing), care, pride, integrity, love (not disney love), respect, and passion have been pushed aside for the use of words that communicate profitability, net gain, cost-benefit analysis, greed, jealousy, bad and good credit, net worth (the idea of measuring somebody by their belongings seems so un-humanistic to me), servitude, and patriotism (which now means that in order to be patriotic, you must blindly follow whatever elected puppet 'rules' our country). please use your vocabulary to tell me how your day was with more than three words. use your knowledge to describe with all the passion in your heart what you want to be doing with the beautiful existence you have come across. let me know how you feel about me and let me know what you want to eat, because i am down for whatever.
if i have anything that i want to lay down on anybody else it it this: i live with passion and compassion, and i think you should too. and the second thing is if you are not ready for the first, than just be kind.