Homecomings
Before you all get worried, I have my annual Spring Break in Numbers to report, there was just some stuff that happened today that I feel are more important than numbers.
Today, our second RA retreat started. I enjoyed it more than I expected, mainly because I'd missed Whitman people, specifically (naturally) my good friends and all the staff members. Yesterday, after driving for about 5 hours from Beaverton to NE Portland to the airport to Walla Walla, I was ecstatic and tired. The car ride from picking Gen up at the Portland airport to Walla Walla passed with laughter, jokes, and little music until the last hour. It was lovely, human interaction that I often feel gets left by the wayside in lew of classes, sports, activities, homework, and everything else that gets in the way of relaxing and just enjoying the little things in life at any given moment.
Speaking of enjoying life, I found out yesterday that I got the job at Tryon! I'm so excited, there's no possible way that I could express it aptly here. I cannot wait.
After a wonderful night of pizza at Sweet Basil and desserts at La Patisserie, during which Kevin, Meg, Gen, and I all laughed so hard our stomachs hurt, Meg, Gen, and I watched "The Butterfly Effect" (a surprisingly entertaining movie and somewhat thought-provoking as well, although at times a little gruesome) and 3 episodes of Friends. After falling asleep in my completely comfortable bed (man, I love my pillow here - it has the best little niche for my head), I woke up to pick up Rob and Colleen from the airport.
And then it was like something came alive a little bit inside of me. And it took hold of me for the rest of the day, and hasn't quite worn off yet. To see Colleen, Rob, Gen, Meg, Bre, and everyone else who I love on staff and who I've missed throughout this break has been wonderful. And then, tonight at the end of the retreat, we did this sweet game called "Touch Someone Who..." Leann picked 6-8 people to stand in the center of the circle, while the circle people closed their eyes and turned their backs. She, or Tricia, then read 5-6 statements such as "Touch someone who makes you laugh," "... who you learned something new about today," "...who inspires you," or "touch someone who is a good leader," among others. And then the 6-8 people in the middle went around softly touching various people in the circle who fulfilled these qualities.
Aside from being a great ego boost, this game elicited in me two specific feelings. The first, a thought that bounced around in my head throughout the activities, was how much I love homecomings. I say it plurally, because I've come to the realization that home is not a place, nor is it memories or fleeting feelings associated it a certain area. For me, home is a feeling. It is being surrounded with people who I care about, and who care about me. Home is where my parents are, home is where Alex is, home is where Molly and Bonnie are, home is where Gen, Bre, John, Colleen, Eden, Hong Ngoc, and a host of other Whitman people are. Home is Anderson, Home is Walla Walla.
Secondly, while standing having various hands brush my back and shoulders, I realized I should not question events or the past in the manner I had been doing. All the thinking I did about past people, experiences, conversations, musings, and effects on various lives while I was back in Portland led me to question feelings and meanings of things that had passed. I came to doubt how I'd react, how others felt about me, how I'd dealt with situations, and the feelings I know in my gut are true but that I questioned because I have such trouble with rejection and finding reasons within myself that people don't stay in my life and excuses for mistreatment I've caused and endured.
But I digress slightly. This game made me realize, once again, that we all are important. We have great effects on those around us, positive and negative. We must act as best as we can, and we must remember and learn. We must take what happened, and what we feel, and felt, in our gut, and never let it go. We must learn from our mistakes. I learned, and remembered, that I have been loved, and have loved passionately, and wonderfully. Really, during Spring Break, I began to doubt myself and the life I led and lead. Tonight, and the last 24 hours, reminded me not to doubt and to remember, continue to learn, to continue to strive, and continue to hope and try and believe and love. Tonight, and the people who I hold near and dearest to me, reminded me to remain inspired and to strive and work towards everything that is good and right and real and tangible but most of all for what is intangible.
Today, our second RA retreat started. I enjoyed it more than I expected, mainly because I'd missed Whitman people, specifically (naturally) my good friends and all the staff members. Yesterday, after driving for about 5 hours from Beaverton to NE Portland to the airport to Walla Walla, I was ecstatic and tired. The car ride from picking Gen up at the Portland airport to Walla Walla passed with laughter, jokes, and little music until the last hour. It was lovely, human interaction that I often feel gets left by the wayside in lew of classes, sports, activities, homework, and everything else that gets in the way of relaxing and just enjoying the little things in life at any given moment.
Speaking of enjoying life, I found out yesterday that I got the job at Tryon! I'm so excited, there's no possible way that I could express it aptly here. I cannot wait.
After a wonderful night of pizza at Sweet Basil and desserts at La Patisserie, during which Kevin, Meg, Gen, and I all laughed so hard our stomachs hurt, Meg, Gen, and I watched "The Butterfly Effect" (a surprisingly entertaining movie and somewhat thought-provoking as well, although at times a little gruesome) and 3 episodes of Friends. After falling asleep in my completely comfortable bed (man, I love my pillow here - it has the best little niche for my head), I woke up to pick up Rob and Colleen from the airport.
And then it was like something came alive a little bit inside of me. And it took hold of me for the rest of the day, and hasn't quite worn off yet. To see Colleen, Rob, Gen, Meg, Bre, and everyone else who I love on staff and who I've missed throughout this break has been wonderful. And then, tonight at the end of the retreat, we did this sweet game called "Touch Someone Who..." Leann picked 6-8 people to stand in the center of the circle, while the circle people closed their eyes and turned their backs. She, or Tricia, then read 5-6 statements such as "Touch someone who makes you laugh," "... who you learned something new about today," "...who inspires you," or "touch someone who is a good leader," among others. And then the 6-8 people in the middle went around softly touching various people in the circle who fulfilled these qualities.
Aside from being a great ego boost, this game elicited in me two specific feelings. The first, a thought that bounced around in my head throughout the activities, was how much I love homecomings. I say it plurally, because I've come to the realization that home is not a place, nor is it memories or fleeting feelings associated it a certain area. For me, home is a feeling. It is being surrounded with people who I care about, and who care about me. Home is where my parents are, home is where Alex is, home is where Molly and Bonnie are, home is where Gen, Bre, John, Colleen, Eden, Hong Ngoc, and a host of other Whitman people are. Home is Anderson, Home is Walla Walla.
Secondly, while standing having various hands brush my back and shoulders, I realized I should not question events or the past in the manner I had been doing. All the thinking I did about past people, experiences, conversations, musings, and effects on various lives while I was back in Portland led me to question feelings and meanings of things that had passed. I came to doubt how I'd react, how others felt about me, how I'd dealt with situations, and the feelings I know in my gut are true but that I questioned because I have such trouble with rejection and finding reasons within myself that people don't stay in my life and excuses for mistreatment I've caused and endured.
But I digress slightly. This game made me realize, once again, that we all are important. We have great effects on those around us, positive and negative. We must act as best as we can, and we must remember and learn. We must take what happened, and what we feel, and felt, in our gut, and never let it go. We must learn from our mistakes. I learned, and remembered, that I have been loved, and have loved passionately, and wonderfully. Really, during Spring Break, I began to doubt myself and the life I led and lead. Tonight, and the last 24 hours, reminded me not to doubt and to remember, continue to learn, to continue to strive, and continue to hope and try and believe and love. Tonight, and the people who I hold near and dearest to me, reminded me to remain inspired and to strive and work towards everything that is good and right and real and tangible but most of all for what is intangible.