When did that hit?
this is the third time ive rewritten this. i wonder if it even matters. who reads my posts? do i say things that are bad? i really dont think so. i try to be honest. honesty hurts me alot. ironic. i think i just drained myself of my hapiness i was feeling. i was happy. you should have seen my posts before. i copied them onto a piece of paper. i liked them. nobody would have liked them. i did though. if i would have posted them. you might not think well of me. i dont think they were that bad. to me. to you maybe. to alot of people of course. honesty makes me loose friends sometimes. not like im mean. im just very honest about my thoughts. sometimes i keep them to myself. sometimes they are really bad. but sometimes i say them anyway. and it seems to make people think bad of me. im sorry you think that. you should really try to understand me if i say something like that. it would really be nice if you did because then i could be honest. i dont tell many people anything anymore. i hope that changes someday. its not like my thoughts are gross or anything. in any way. this is my third time posting this. thats funny. because i was happy. and as i kept deleting as i typed what i was thinking i got less happy. its pretty much gone. maybe i should go to sleep. i cant. i hope i dont get stuck awake again. that was bad. wasit insomnia? i really dont believe so. but i couldnt sleep. i tried too. i couldnt. but it wasnt insomnia. i dont think so. it could have been sopmething new. something different. i dont think so. maybe one day ill tell you. i dont think so. maybe. i dont know you for all i know. you shouldnt be reading this if i dont know you well. its very rude. im gunna try to sleep if i dont maybe ill tell you. if you arent you a stranger. im really not that hapy anymore. my mood swings are bad now. im gunna go to my bed and think of why i was so happy before and maybe it will come back. i wont tell you why i was happy. you might think bad of me. thats too bad you would think that.