GLEE: The Grass is Always Greener
Title: The Grass is Always Greener
Chapter: 5/?
Rating: overall NC-17, this chapter PG-13
Characters: Noah 'Puck' Puckerman, Quinn Fabray, ensemble
Pairing: Quinn/Puck
Warnings: Body swap, teen pregnancy
Spoilers: Blanket Season 2
Disclaimer: Not mine. No money. No affiliation.
A/N: from the glee_angst_meme, prompt here
Summary: Somehow, Quinn and Puck somehow end up in each others bodies. It's not as fun as it sounds either. The really horrifying thing? Puck ends up pregnant and seeing how the other half lives. This is not how he wanted to spend his senior year.
Secondary Note: Really, really, really confusing pronouns ahead.
What is really weird is how well it works.
They make it three weeks before either of them start to screw up, and Puck's kind of proud of that. He's figured out the hair stuff, it's not that difficult, and Kurt totally interfered and showed him these little 'tips' on how to manage shorter hair. Puck did not complain because it was free advice on hair. Puck didn't even 'condition' his own hair, so whatever. The make-up is simple, because if Quinn doesn't know she looks damn good then she's blind and possibly insane, so Puck doesn't need to learn more than the basics (if he was Tina, he'd die, because there is no way he'd learn all that shit, and there'd be the Mike thing, so he's pretty glad he's not Tina). The cheerleading actually came pretty easy, they learned that the body seems to remember doing these things from before, so they just have to think about them and it works -it's annoying that Quinn gets his gaming skills, his guitar playing, his punch throwing, his football tackles and he gets her cheerleading and dancing. Seriously, it's lame. He totally begs off school when Quinn goes on the rag and she totally shows up after school with ice cream, sobfest movies and a heat pack that she places over his tummy. Puck blames her stupid hormones for snuggling into her side and crying at the end of Walk to Remember. It's the stupidest movie he's ever seen and that is that.
So, three weeks into things, he's not failing her French class as much as he thought, although Kurt ends up being his class partner because Puck pretty much demanded that he be made Kurt's partner when the teacher was handing out the assignments. Kurt's under the impression that Quinn is making sure no one picks on Kurt for whatever. Puck is making sure that Quinn doesn't kill him for failing French.
But it's really not as bad as it could be; Rach and San are still Rach and San, although Puck can actually put up with this version of Rachel. She still talks a lot, but sometimes she's witty about it and not just condescending (and yeah, she's totally putting words in his mouth) and San's just always been a bitch so he's used to it. He's gotten the hang of girl talk too; they talk about guys a lot, and what they want to do with their life, and if they think certain actors are gay or not. He's had four facials now and he's pretty sure it's Quinn's body that likes the manicure/pedicure thing, but the waxing isn't all that bad when you get used to it.
The hardest thing to get used to, without a doubt, was the change in their singing. Quinn's voice is not suited for his usual brand of music and Quinn had the same issue. So he pointed out some of his favourite songs in his music collection, gave her a list of bands and singers and whatever and she did the same. He's pretty sure she's a hippy with all this music about love and freedom and whatever, but she's got some Bikini Kill in there and that surprised the shit out of him. He told her he was adding some other awesome chick bands and she had to get over it, because he wasn't getting all Melissa Etheridge in there. No one in glee really notices anything, beyond Rach giving him a funny look the first week, before he and Quinn figured things out and then it was fine. He wonders if he actually wants one of them to figure it out -preferably someone who might have an idea on how to fix things, not Finn or Brittany, but like Kurt or Artie or Rachel or Santana maybe, or Tina, Tina knows some weird shit. But they don't seem to notice even the slightest change.
So, three weeks in, when Puck absently flirts with Mercedes, he's about to lose his shit with Quinn. At this point, Puck knows that the first floor girl’s toilets between the guidance office and the English department is where shit goes down. So grabbing Quinn in between classes, pulling her into the toilet and shoving the doorstop into the door to stop any interruptions is just the best way to go. "What the hell is your problem?" Puck's found that Quinn's voice is fairly dynamic, because she can still sound pissed off, confused and not like nails on a chalk board, all at the same time. "Are you actually having problems with 'don't dare break up Mercedes and Sam'? Because I don't know where that's difficult."
"Oh please, if a little bit of flirting is going to break them up they shouldn't be together." He doesn't get it -really, he doesn't, it's not the whole ego thing or anything, he just does not get why she wants Sam so bad. Sam's great and all, a little loose in the head sometimes, but he's a bro. But Quinn doesn't get that -she doesn't get his dorky side, the side that does finger painting and reads comics and totally digs Revenge of the Sith over Empire Strikes Back. Quinn doesn't even get Star Wars jokes.
"You are a piece of work. He's with Aretha, stop messing in peoples shit." It's not because Sam and Mercedes are like, made for each other like Rachel thinks she and Finn are, it's not even because Puck's not that into Mercedes (she's fun and all, and she's pretty cool, but they are totally just friends). It's more because Sam has some major trust issues since Quinn fucked him over, that he's kind of paranoid about his relationship with Mercedes and Puck is not going to be the one giving him reason to think there's something wrong. He's not going to be that douche that goes for his friends girls again. "I swear to God, if you don't back off I will force myself to make out with Jew-fro in front of the whole school. I do not care, I will do it."
"You wouldn't."
"That's my bro you're messing with. Back it the hell off or I will." They haven't actually fought since this whole thing started, which was a record for them. But it turns out the weirdness was probably just overshadowing their personalities again and the friction was starting up again in true fashion. Puck didn't even wait for her to make her comeback -because they could stand there all day and argue, really, they were that good at it- so he just kicked the doorstop out of the way and left the bathroom to head, late, to her History class.
---
Rach and San noticed his mood pretty easily, but he didn't share the reason why. At lunch, Quinn flirted with three other girls, and Puck didn't even care who they were or if they were hot, but they weren't Mercedes so he figured that was something. Sam and Mercedes seemed fine at glee and Quinn stayed the hell away. It was good that she took his threat seriously, because making out with Jacob Ben Israel was not something he wanted to do. Although he was painfully hard up for any action, that annoying reminder that he was in a girl’s body and Santana was probably the only chick who was into that -except Brittany but she was dating Artie and he'd made the whole 'no other people' thing kinda clear for her this time. Which meant no action at all, which was worse than when he was dating Lauren, because she at least gave him a little something.
And apparently, girl’s moods stayed for ages. He was sitting in Quinn's room, homework actually completed, listening to music -which he'd just said fuck it and bought his own taste off her iTunes- and he was still pissed off. He should've been able to just game it out, because he did that all that time, but Quinn in her ever stupid girly way, didn't have a games console at all -like not even a DS, and Puck was losing his mind. He was about ready to call Rachel and ask for an impromptu 'girls night' for the two of them, because he'd gotten good at speaking Rachel which meant he could vent without giving too much away, when the doorbell rang.
Ms Fabray had gone on her little society retreat thing, she was gone for the rest of the week which meant Puck actually needed to get up and traipse down the stairs to answer the door. Great.
When he opened it to his own face, he smirked, and slammed the door on Quinn. "Ha ha, very mature. Open the door, Puck." It was weird, remembering to answer to Puck and to Quinn, especially his own voice calling him by his own name and everyone else using hers. It bugged the life out of him sometimes that they couldn't just tell someone; it annoyed him even more that things weren't back to normal yet. It was almost a month and he was still a girl and it sucked. "We should talk this one out, okay? Because we're not going to get anything done if we're mad at each other."
He really hates when she has a point. So, they have something to eat in the kitchen, after he explains that her mom went on that retreat and her Dad totally tried to get her to stay with him for the week until Puck had one of the most epic screaming matches with him just to get Ms Fabray to say no. It was easy, Puck knows that Quinn hasn't made up with her Dad yet and that's all good, because Puck got to scream about issues that he'd thought he'd put to rest but turns out he just buried. It was pretty cathartic or whatever. Even if he did start crying half way through.
"This thing, with Sam and Mercedes," he knew it would come up, but he didn't expect it would cause another flare of annoyance in him.
"Listen, you might not think it's a big deal, but it is. You really did a number on that guy," and that is something he, Finn and Sam have in common, the Quinn Fabray baggage, "and Santana didn't help. He's a great kid, okay, and Mercedes is better for him than you, and it's weird, yeah, the football guy and the singing geek, but Finn and Rachel make it work, so just let Sam and Mercedes hash it out on their own, would you?" Some jocks just aren't meant to date cheerleaders. Apparently most of the glee kids don't adhere to the social norms that Coach Sylvester would like them to stick to (fuck, Rachel is messing with his vocab again).
"This is a big deal for you, isn't it?" He should be glad that she actually notices when something matters, he should at least be glad that she's not being a total stuck up, selfish snob like she would've been if this was two years ago and she was still that girl. Really, it irritates him that she might know him that well. Only Santana really knows him that well.
"Yeah, because even if you get the guy, I'll still be the douche that messed up his friends relationship. Again." And really, that was not a stigma he really wanted back, because getting back to things being okay with Finn was hard. He really didn't want to have to do that with Sam when he wasn't the one that screwed things up.
"Okay."
"Okay?" That was like, the lamest answer or response to a guy being fucking honest. Seriously, he's doing the feelings bullshit and she gives him 'okay'? What is up with that?
"Okay, I'll let it be. But if they break up before I get my body back, you better make the effort to get in his good books." He figures he'll have a better shot at that than she will, because she is not good at proving herself trustworthy because hell, she never really thinks she's done something that needs correcting. It's a pain that sometimes she doesn't really need to anyway.
"Hey, your mom's away until Monday afternoon, you wanna come over tomorrow? Rach is doing some weird whatever with Finn, I didn't ask details because it sounded like one of those Crazy-Rachel things, and Santana's got a family thing. I'm bored out of my mind in your house." Because there was nothing fun, and Ms Fabray was on some program that meant no alcohol in the house and frankly, he could only do so much. Quinn just smiles and nods and they spend the rest of the night on the sofa watching all the shows she doesn't get to watch at his house that he still TiVo's for her. God, he's a pushover.
---
"All right, what's going on with Puck?" Puck has no idea why he is the one that Kurt and Mercedes corner during their study break, but wow, awkward.
"There isn't enough time to answer that question," putting himself down is really starting to become a problem, "care to narrow it down a little?"
"He was hitting on Mercedes, then he was hitting on Jill Andrews, then he was hitting on Becky -and I don't think he was doing it in a mean way, but he totally made her day, and today he was flirting with no less than four Cheerio's at the same time." Well, at least his rep isn't taking hits -although being nice with Becky will only work in his favour because she's Captain of the Cheerio's.
"Um, I'm not sure where the question is in this. He broke up with Lauren during the summer, isn't he past due for his rebound?" Puck never thought that stupid chick-flick movies would come in handy, but really, being a girl is too much like studying for life and it sucks. "Seriously, it's like his thing, isn't it? Flirting and hook-ups. At least he's not being a total whipped dog anymore." Mercedes rolls her eyes, but, for all that they like Lauren -and Puck was genuinely surprised at that- they all seemed to think he and she were better off not together. Weird.
"Okay, rebounding is one thing, but the boy is flirting and not paying out."
"And you want him to, what, hook up with everyone?" See, this is where he has problems. Girls say they want someone who listens and talks and shares their feelings, not someone who just wants sex. But then when you try to do the whole feelings and listening and shit, they want sex. It's such a freaking ride, and not in the good way. And why did these two think that Quinn was a good person to talk to about his apparent flirting? Seriously, nothing makes sense. "He's probably just blowing off steam, what does it matter?"
"Because, boy is far more focused with one girl, not twelve." Which is true, he'll give Mercedes that. But Quinn doesn't seem the type to want to be the guy in a relationship with his body and frankly, Puck isn't up for that either, so she can flirt with anyone she wants, but Puck's pretty sure she's not following through at all, with anyone.
"And you're telling me this, because," he'd really like them to get to the point, because he does actually have to study this period because stupid Mrs Miller decided that tests were good and he does not believe he will be passing this stupid English Lit paper without some study cramming.
"While it is known and understood that you and Noah have history," who the hell told Hummel he could call him 'Noah'? And if it was Quinn Puck is going to have to have words, "it is also known that he tends to listen to what you have to say." Quinn's eyebrow raises into her hair line because Puck had never fucking noticed that and damn it's true. "So, 'Cedes and I thought, maybe, you could talk to him about his, well, promiscuity and maybe convince him that, if not Lauren, maybe his attentions would be better funnelled into someone else." He'd rather drive an ice pick through his skull, but.
"I'll keep it in mind." And since Quinn is not overly friendly with these two beyond glee and French and sharing History with Mercedes, well, she can just sort of, "I have an English test to study for now, so if you're finished with the interference in Noah's social life, I have to go." And really, his good intentions to study have just been shot to hell, because Princess and Aretha just gave him far too much to think about.
Why does he always tend to sway towards Quinn's intentions? He knew that, when she was pregnant, he'd go to whatever lengths she needed him to. He did screw up big time for her and really, getting her what she needed and wanted only seemed like the least he could do. When she wanted to 'appear' like a couple so that people didn't comment about 'single mother' status and whatever, well, he stopped sleeping around and held her hand in the hallways and staged arguments and did the 'boyfriend' stuff. When she needed the most specific thing at three in the morning and he had to drive two hours to get it, well, he only complained to himself in the truck while getting it for her.
But even after all that, after they gave up Beth and they'd agreed that no, they didn't want to try anything -mostly she'd said she didn't want a relationship or whatever and he'd been pretty much down with not getting serious with anyone, ever- he'd still been swayed by what she'd wanted. At least until he drove the car through the side of the store and tried to 'steal' the ATM (apparently, getting drunk, crashing into a building and ending up with the ATM embedded in the window of the car is 'stealing' now). And then he was just a mess. But whatever. It was confusing that Quinn's opinion mattered, like when Santana was ragging on Lauren, Quinn actually stopped him to say that it was admirable that he was seeing past looks and getting serious about someone. He really needed to wonder why that meant more than anyone else asking what he was thinking.
By the time English is set to start, Puck is no closer to figuring this shit out and he hasn't studied a damn thing. The only way this day could get worse would be if Mr Schue started rapping.
---
Part Six
Chapter: 5/?
Rating: overall NC-17, this chapter PG-13
Characters: Noah 'Puck' Puckerman, Quinn Fabray, ensemble
Pairing: Quinn/Puck
Warnings: Body swap, teen pregnancy
Spoilers: Blanket Season 2
Disclaimer: Not mine. No money. No affiliation.
A/N: from the glee_angst_meme, prompt here
Summary: Somehow, Quinn and Puck somehow end up in each others bodies. It's not as fun as it sounds either. The really horrifying thing? Puck ends up pregnant and seeing how the other half lives. This is not how he wanted to spend his senior year.
Secondary Note: Really, really, really confusing pronouns ahead.
What is really weird is how well it works.
They make it three weeks before either of them start to screw up, and Puck's kind of proud of that. He's figured out the hair stuff, it's not that difficult, and Kurt totally interfered and showed him these little 'tips' on how to manage shorter hair. Puck did not complain because it was free advice on hair. Puck didn't even 'condition' his own hair, so whatever. The make-up is simple, because if Quinn doesn't know she looks damn good then she's blind and possibly insane, so Puck doesn't need to learn more than the basics (if he was Tina, he'd die, because there is no way he'd learn all that shit, and there'd be the Mike thing, so he's pretty glad he's not Tina). The cheerleading actually came pretty easy, they learned that the body seems to remember doing these things from before, so they just have to think about them and it works -it's annoying that Quinn gets his gaming skills, his guitar playing, his punch throwing, his football tackles and he gets her cheerleading and dancing. Seriously, it's lame. He totally begs off school when Quinn goes on the rag and she totally shows up after school with ice cream, sobfest movies and a heat pack that she places over his tummy. Puck blames her stupid hormones for snuggling into her side and crying at the end of Walk to Remember. It's the stupidest movie he's ever seen and that is that.
So, three weeks into things, he's not failing her French class as much as he thought, although Kurt ends up being his class partner because Puck pretty much demanded that he be made Kurt's partner when the teacher was handing out the assignments. Kurt's under the impression that Quinn is making sure no one picks on Kurt for whatever. Puck is making sure that Quinn doesn't kill him for failing French.
But it's really not as bad as it could be; Rach and San are still Rach and San, although Puck can actually put up with this version of Rachel. She still talks a lot, but sometimes she's witty about it and not just condescending (and yeah, she's totally putting words in his mouth) and San's just always been a bitch so he's used to it. He's gotten the hang of girl talk too; they talk about guys a lot, and what they want to do with their life, and if they think certain actors are gay or not. He's had four facials now and he's pretty sure it's Quinn's body that likes the manicure/pedicure thing, but the waxing isn't all that bad when you get used to it.
The hardest thing to get used to, without a doubt, was the change in their singing. Quinn's voice is not suited for his usual brand of music and Quinn had the same issue. So he pointed out some of his favourite songs in his music collection, gave her a list of bands and singers and whatever and she did the same. He's pretty sure she's a hippy with all this music about love and freedom and whatever, but she's got some Bikini Kill in there and that surprised the shit out of him. He told her he was adding some other awesome chick bands and she had to get over it, because he wasn't getting all Melissa Etheridge in there. No one in glee really notices anything, beyond Rach giving him a funny look the first week, before he and Quinn figured things out and then it was fine. He wonders if he actually wants one of them to figure it out -preferably someone who might have an idea on how to fix things, not Finn or Brittany, but like Kurt or Artie or Rachel or Santana maybe, or Tina, Tina knows some weird shit. But they don't seem to notice even the slightest change.
So, three weeks in, when Puck absently flirts with Mercedes, he's about to lose his shit with Quinn. At this point, Puck knows that the first floor girl’s toilets between the guidance office and the English department is where shit goes down. So grabbing Quinn in between classes, pulling her into the toilet and shoving the doorstop into the door to stop any interruptions is just the best way to go. "What the hell is your problem?" Puck's found that Quinn's voice is fairly dynamic, because she can still sound pissed off, confused and not like nails on a chalk board, all at the same time. "Are you actually having problems with 'don't dare break up Mercedes and Sam'? Because I don't know where that's difficult."
"Oh please, if a little bit of flirting is going to break them up they shouldn't be together." He doesn't get it -really, he doesn't, it's not the whole ego thing or anything, he just does not get why she wants Sam so bad. Sam's great and all, a little loose in the head sometimes, but he's a bro. But Quinn doesn't get that -she doesn't get his dorky side, the side that does finger painting and reads comics and totally digs Revenge of the Sith over Empire Strikes Back. Quinn doesn't even get Star Wars jokes.
"You are a piece of work. He's with Aretha, stop messing in peoples shit." It's not because Sam and Mercedes are like, made for each other like Rachel thinks she and Finn are, it's not even because Puck's not that into Mercedes (she's fun and all, and she's pretty cool, but they are totally just friends). It's more because Sam has some major trust issues since Quinn fucked him over, that he's kind of paranoid about his relationship with Mercedes and Puck is not going to be the one giving him reason to think there's something wrong. He's not going to be that douche that goes for his friends girls again. "I swear to God, if you don't back off I will force myself to make out with Jew-fro in front of the whole school. I do not care, I will do it."
"You wouldn't."
"That's my bro you're messing with. Back it the hell off or I will." They haven't actually fought since this whole thing started, which was a record for them. But it turns out the weirdness was probably just overshadowing their personalities again and the friction was starting up again in true fashion. Puck didn't even wait for her to make her comeback -because they could stand there all day and argue, really, they were that good at it- so he just kicked the doorstop out of the way and left the bathroom to head, late, to her History class.
---
Rach and San noticed his mood pretty easily, but he didn't share the reason why. At lunch, Quinn flirted with three other girls, and Puck didn't even care who they were or if they were hot, but they weren't Mercedes so he figured that was something. Sam and Mercedes seemed fine at glee and Quinn stayed the hell away. It was good that she took his threat seriously, because making out with Jacob Ben Israel was not something he wanted to do. Although he was painfully hard up for any action, that annoying reminder that he was in a girl’s body and Santana was probably the only chick who was into that -except Brittany but she was dating Artie and he'd made the whole 'no other people' thing kinda clear for her this time. Which meant no action at all, which was worse than when he was dating Lauren, because she at least gave him a little something.
And apparently, girl’s moods stayed for ages. He was sitting in Quinn's room, homework actually completed, listening to music -which he'd just said fuck it and bought his own taste off her iTunes- and he was still pissed off. He should've been able to just game it out, because he did that all that time, but Quinn in her ever stupid girly way, didn't have a games console at all -like not even a DS, and Puck was losing his mind. He was about ready to call Rachel and ask for an impromptu 'girls night' for the two of them, because he'd gotten good at speaking Rachel which meant he could vent without giving too much away, when the doorbell rang.
Ms Fabray had gone on her little society retreat thing, she was gone for the rest of the week which meant Puck actually needed to get up and traipse down the stairs to answer the door. Great.
When he opened it to his own face, he smirked, and slammed the door on Quinn. "Ha ha, very mature. Open the door, Puck." It was weird, remembering to answer to Puck and to Quinn, especially his own voice calling him by his own name and everyone else using hers. It bugged the life out of him sometimes that they couldn't just tell someone; it annoyed him even more that things weren't back to normal yet. It was almost a month and he was still a girl and it sucked. "We should talk this one out, okay? Because we're not going to get anything done if we're mad at each other."
He really hates when she has a point. So, they have something to eat in the kitchen, after he explains that her mom went on that retreat and her Dad totally tried to get her to stay with him for the week until Puck had one of the most epic screaming matches with him just to get Ms Fabray to say no. It was easy, Puck knows that Quinn hasn't made up with her Dad yet and that's all good, because Puck got to scream about issues that he'd thought he'd put to rest but turns out he just buried. It was pretty cathartic or whatever. Even if he did start crying half way through.
"This thing, with Sam and Mercedes," he knew it would come up, but he didn't expect it would cause another flare of annoyance in him.
"Listen, you might not think it's a big deal, but it is. You really did a number on that guy," and that is something he, Finn and Sam have in common, the Quinn Fabray baggage, "and Santana didn't help. He's a great kid, okay, and Mercedes is better for him than you, and it's weird, yeah, the football guy and the singing geek, but Finn and Rachel make it work, so just let Sam and Mercedes hash it out on their own, would you?" Some jocks just aren't meant to date cheerleaders. Apparently most of the glee kids don't adhere to the social norms that Coach Sylvester would like them to stick to (fuck, Rachel is messing with his vocab again).
"This is a big deal for you, isn't it?" He should be glad that she actually notices when something matters, he should at least be glad that she's not being a total stuck up, selfish snob like she would've been if this was two years ago and she was still that girl. Really, it irritates him that she might know him that well. Only Santana really knows him that well.
"Yeah, because even if you get the guy, I'll still be the douche that messed up his friends relationship. Again." And really, that was not a stigma he really wanted back, because getting back to things being okay with Finn was hard. He really didn't want to have to do that with Sam when he wasn't the one that screwed things up.
"Okay."
"Okay?" That was like, the lamest answer or response to a guy being fucking honest. Seriously, he's doing the feelings bullshit and she gives him 'okay'? What is up with that?
"Okay, I'll let it be. But if they break up before I get my body back, you better make the effort to get in his good books." He figures he'll have a better shot at that than she will, because she is not good at proving herself trustworthy because hell, she never really thinks she's done something that needs correcting. It's a pain that sometimes she doesn't really need to anyway.
"Hey, your mom's away until Monday afternoon, you wanna come over tomorrow? Rach is doing some weird whatever with Finn, I didn't ask details because it sounded like one of those Crazy-Rachel things, and Santana's got a family thing. I'm bored out of my mind in your house." Because there was nothing fun, and Ms Fabray was on some program that meant no alcohol in the house and frankly, he could only do so much. Quinn just smiles and nods and they spend the rest of the night on the sofa watching all the shows she doesn't get to watch at his house that he still TiVo's for her. God, he's a pushover.
---
"All right, what's going on with Puck?" Puck has no idea why he is the one that Kurt and Mercedes corner during their study break, but wow, awkward.
"There isn't enough time to answer that question," putting himself down is really starting to become a problem, "care to narrow it down a little?"
"He was hitting on Mercedes, then he was hitting on Jill Andrews, then he was hitting on Becky -and I don't think he was doing it in a mean way, but he totally made her day, and today he was flirting with no less than four Cheerio's at the same time." Well, at least his rep isn't taking hits -although being nice with Becky will only work in his favour because she's Captain of the Cheerio's.
"Um, I'm not sure where the question is in this. He broke up with Lauren during the summer, isn't he past due for his rebound?" Puck never thought that stupid chick-flick movies would come in handy, but really, being a girl is too much like studying for life and it sucks. "Seriously, it's like his thing, isn't it? Flirting and hook-ups. At least he's not being a total whipped dog anymore." Mercedes rolls her eyes, but, for all that they like Lauren -and Puck was genuinely surprised at that- they all seemed to think he and she were better off not together. Weird.
"Okay, rebounding is one thing, but the boy is flirting and not paying out."
"And you want him to, what, hook up with everyone?" See, this is where he has problems. Girls say they want someone who listens and talks and shares their feelings, not someone who just wants sex. But then when you try to do the whole feelings and listening and shit, they want sex. It's such a freaking ride, and not in the good way. And why did these two think that Quinn was a good person to talk to about his apparent flirting? Seriously, nothing makes sense. "He's probably just blowing off steam, what does it matter?"
"Because, boy is far more focused with one girl, not twelve." Which is true, he'll give Mercedes that. But Quinn doesn't seem the type to want to be the guy in a relationship with his body and frankly, Puck isn't up for that either, so she can flirt with anyone she wants, but Puck's pretty sure she's not following through at all, with anyone.
"And you're telling me this, because," he'd really like them to get to the point, because he does actually have to study this period because stupid Mrs Miller decided that tests were good and he does not believe he will be passing this stupid English Lit paper without some study cramming.
"While it is known and understood that you and Noah have history," who the hell told Hummel he could call him 'Noah'? And if it was Quinn Puck is going to have to have words, "it is also known that he tends to listen to what you have to say." Quinn's eyebrow raises into her hair line because Puck had never fucking noticed that and damn it's true. "So, 'Cedes and I thought, maybe, you could talk to him about his, well, promiscuity and maybe convince him that, if not Lauren, maybe his attentions would be better funnelled into someone else." He'd rather drive an ice pick through his skull, but.
"I'll keep it in mind." And since Quinn is not overly friendly with these two beyond glee and French and sharing History with Mercedes, well, she can just sort of, "I have an English test to study for now, so if you're finished with the interference in Noah's social life, I have to go." And really, his good intentions to study have just been shot to hell, because Princess and Aretha just gave him far too much to think about.
Why does he always tend to sway towards Quinn's intentions? He knew that, when she was pregnant, he'd go to whatever lengths she needed him to. He did screw up big time for her and really, getting her what she needed and wanted only seemed like the least he could do. When she wanted to 'appear' like a couple so that people didn't comment about 'single mother' status and whatever, well, he stopped sleeping around and held her hand in the hallways and staged arguments and did the 'boyfriend' stuff. When she needed the most specific thing at three in the morning and he had to drive two hours to get it, well, he only complained to himself in the truck while getting it for her.
But even after all that, after they gave up Beth and they'd agreed that no, they didn't want to try anything -mostly she'd said she didn't want a relationship or whatever and he'd been pretty much down with not getting serious with anyone, ever- he'd still been swayed by what she'd wanted. At least until he drove the car through the side of the store and tried to 'steal' the ATM (apparently, getting drunk, crashing into a building and ending up with the ATM embedded in the window of the car is 'stealing' now). And then he was just a mess. But whatever. It was confusing that Quinn's opinion mattered, like when Santana was ragging on Lauren, Quinn actually stopped him to say that it was admirable that he was seeing past looks and getting serious about someone. He really needed to wonder why that meant more than anyone else asking what he was thinking.
By the time English is set to start, Puck is no closer to figuring this shit out and he hasn't studied a damn thing. The only way this day could get worse would be if Mr Schue started rapping.
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Part Six