More from zenethics
Music Snob My music is better than yours, and I can give you a million reasons why. I cannot, however, tell you why I've wasted my life memorizing the words to songs you've never heard of or sitting in my parent's basement for hours on end listening to all my favourite songs in reverse. One day I'll go deaf, and I'll kill myself. The only comfort to my family and friends will be the sweet sweet alanis morissette-variety irony that was my demise.
Sports fanatic Football, ya! My favourite team hasn't won a game in 10 years, but I still show up to every game 1/2 naked, covered in paint of their colors. I'm usually alone. One day, my team will change its colors, and I, having not read the paint label, will die of lead poisoning. The team that I was supporting will laugh.
Gamer I'm #1 on the ladder, I average a 10:1 frag ratio in public games, and I have a level 99 wizard. I've never actually talked to a girl, except this one time online in a chat room, but I think that was really a guy. I still masturbated. One day, the ladder will reset, they'll delete my wizard, and I'll develop permenant carpal tunnel syndrome (from playing games... I swear!) I'll die when the swat team shows up after I've shot most of my class mates... wtf where is the respawn?
Anime lover I'm like a 5 year old asian kid, except 35, fat, and white. I speak a little japanese, but I claim to be fluent. I don't really have a job, per se, so much as I hang around the mall in my komono giving strange looks to children. One day I'll impale myself on my katana. People will be baffled by the sheer physics of the act.
Actor I have millions and everybody loves me. I could retire right now, if I wanted to, but I could never give up the attention that I receive. One day I'll be old and washed up. I'll jump at the opportunity of acting in a depends commercial. I'll overdose on something, or I'll die of old age... because thats just how actors go.
Music star Every day I polish my revolver and shoot my head... like a rock star.
Teacher I have a degree in education. I have the distinction of being the lowest paid profession that requires a college degree; garbage men make more than I do. Every day I show up to school knowing that the children I am teaching will grow up to be far more successful than myself. I'll claim that I could have done something much more challenging, but that I love children. Everybody knows this is not true. I'll still be employed when I die, as teachers can't afford to retire. My students will be ecstatic.
Live Journal/Xanga users Hey everybody, look at me. I'm an e-ttention whore if there ever was one. Today I ate pizza. Doesn't everybody care? I'll be sure to make one last update as I'm dying, to let all my internet friends know whats up. This will be easy because my death will probably be self inflicted (read all about it on my livejournal... cry cry cry my life sucks).
Sports fanatic Football, ya! My favourite team hasn't won a game in 10 years, but I still show up to every game 1/2 naked, covered in paint of their colors. I'm usually alone. One day, my team will change its colors, and I, having not read the paint label, will die of lead poisoning. The team that I was supporting will laugh.
Gamer I'm #1 on the ladder, I average a 10:1 frag ratio in public games, and I have a level 99 wizard. I've never actually talked to a girl, except this one time online in a chat room, but I think that was really a guy. I still masturbated. One day, the ladder will reset, they'll delete my wizard, and I'll develop permenant carpal tunnel syndrome (from playing games... I swear!) I'll die when the swat team shows up after I've shot most of my class mates... wtf where is the respawn?
Anime lover I'm like a 5 year old asian kid, except 35, fat, and white. I speak a little japanese, but I claim to be fluent. I don't really have a job, per se, so much as I hang around the mall in my komono giving strange looks to children. One day I'll impale myself on my katana. People will be baffled by the sheer physics of the act.
Actor I have millions and everybody loves me. I could retire right now, if I wanted to, but I could never give up the attention that I receive. One day I'll be old and washed up. I'll jump at the opportunity of acting in a depends commercial. I'll overdose on something, or I'll die of old age... because thats just how actors go.
Music star Every day I polish my revolver and shoot my head... like a rock star.
Teacher I have a degree in education. I have the distinction of being the lowest paid profession that requires a college degree; garbage men make more than I do. Every day I show up to school knowing that the children I am teaching will grow up to be far more successful than myself. I'll claim that I could have done something much more challenging, but that I love children. Everybody knows this is not true. I'll still be employed when I die, as teachers can't afford to retire. My students will be ecstatic.
Live Journal/Xanga users Hey everybody, look at me. I'm an e-ttention whore if there ever was one. Today I ate pizza. Doesn't everybody care? I'll be sure to make one last update as I'm dying, to let all my internet friends know whats up. This will be easy because my death will probably be self inflicted (read all about it on my livejournal... cry cry cry my life sucks).