She ain't you
Title: She ain't you
Author letsflywannabe
Rating: PG - 15
Summary: Jonghyun realises where he truly belongs.
Italics are song lyrics and Jonghyun/Onew's thoughts.
You make it hard for me to see somebody else
I'm calling her your name
Yea its messed up, cause I'm thinkin 'bout you
It's your fault babe
Jonghyun walks down the dimly lit street. His breath comes out in little puffs that curled in the air, and he watches them disappear and sighs. How was he supposed to face Jinki? Sure, he had the girl of his dreams but it didn't feel...right. He was supposed to see fireworks behind his eyelids or some cheesy shit like that when they kissed. Instead, it just felt...awkward. Misplaced. Jonghyun's face burned with embarrassment when he recalled a particular moment.
"Come on Jjong! Seriously, you're THIS shy?" she laughed merrily and leaned closer. Jonghyun leaned closer and...hesitated. Why was he hesitating? Was it because he expected to see eyes crinkled with laughter and that adorable grin? What? NO..no way! Jinki hyung and I are just friends! Then why did he feel faintly ashamed when he told the guys he was dating her? Was it because of the moment he thought he saw Jinki's face fall for a second...?
"...YAH, JONGHYUN! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?? HELLO? ANYONE HOME??" she waved her arms in front of him and looked annoyed. "You always space out like this when we even come close to being intimate!" she pouted, crossed her arms and turned away. Jonghyun snapped back and grinned sheepishly, scratching the back of his head.
"Sorry jagiya ~ " He pouted and within seconds, she was cooing at him, intimacy troubles all forgotten. Whew,that was close. And it was at that moment, once again his brain decided to remind him that he'd much rather prefer being laughed at by Jinki for his ridiculous puffer fish pout and feel weirdly warm and tingly when he'd have to pat him on the back after Jinki's excessive laughing fit.
Well fuck. He just couldn't get away from Jinki, could he?
I never wanted us to break up
No not this way
But you don't understand it girl
Jonghyun didn't reply when Jinki asked him whether he was alright. Jonghyun didn't reply when Jinki asked him if he'd like to have dinner together. Jonghyun was at his limit when Jinki cornered him after their performance and demanded to know what was wrong. "Jjong, if it's the fan girls, don't worry about them. They'll understand, you'll see!" topped off with his crinkly-eyed smile was just the last fucking straw. Jonghyun shoved Jinki away.
"I'm alright hyung. Just leave me the fuck alone for 5 minutes, will you?" he said and walked off without a backwards glance.
"...I don't understand. I..." Jinki felt like his world had suddenly shifted off its axis. He leaned against the wall and tried willing the tears away.
"Hyung, it's okay to cry sometimes, you know." A pair of slightly muscular arms wound around him. Minho-ah. Jinki sniffed into Minho's shoulder.
"I'm not crying! I have allergies...to...things..." Jinki declared. Minho rolled his eyes.
"Of course hyung. I believe you." Jinki pulled away from Minho's embrace and gave him a watery smile.
"Thank you Minho-ah. I..needed that." Minho just smiled at him.
"You sure you're okay, hyung?"
"I'll be okay, Minho. Now shoo, Donghae-hyung was looking for you!" Jinki said with his trademark crinkly-eyed smile.
Jonghyun slammed his fist against the door. So you go to Minho now? He took a deep breath and calmed himself. He rang the second number on his speed-dial.
"Hey jagiya ~"
"Hey baby ~ you haven't called me in a while!"
"I know sweetheart, I've just been so busy. I was wondering if you were free tomorrow evening.."
"Yeah, I'm free tomorrow, why?"
"Well I was thinking about making up for all the dates we didn't have ~ what does my jagiya want to do?"
"Really? I want to stay in and spend time with you, baby ~"
"Alright then. I'll see you tomorrow?"
"For sure, baby ~ love you!"
"You too"
At least he had some distraction from his messed-up mind. Jonghyun sauntered away, a small smile on his face.
Jinki didn't understand why hearing Jonghyun talk to her made him feel strange. I feel like I have heartburn. Strange. I didn't eat anything unusual. I slept properly too... He shook his head to clear his thoughts and hurried behind Taemin. "Come on guys! Don't dawdle! We have a schedule to keep to!" Kibum yelled.
When she touches me, I'm wishing that they were your hands
And when I'm with her its only 'bout the sex
With you I had a bad romance
She moaned and Jonghyun felt the vibration shoot straight into his cock. He gasped."Ahh..I'm so clo-" and he came into her mouth. She swallowed and looked up at him through her lashes. And all this time, it took just the thought of having Jinki that drove him over the edge. She pushed herself up against him and Jonghyun felt a stab of revulsion. Nevertheless, he lubed up his fingers and inserted them, one at a time into her, until she had her head thrown back and moaned his name.
"Jong-ah...Jonghyun!" He watched her come dispassionately and dropped a perfunctory kiss on her lips, withdrew his fingers and went to take a shower.
And if I could, just trade her in I would
'Cause nobody compares to ya
"You know, when we're close...that's when you seem furthest away, Jjong."
Jonghyun sighed. How was he supposed to explain that? Tell her that he wanted Jinki instead of her? Wanted to make Jinki come undone with his fingers and his lips and... He'd had enough. Jonghyun sighed again.
"Baby we need to talk..."
I think I better let her go
'Cause I can't leave you alone
Every day that I'm with her, all I want is you
Jonghyun knocked on their door. He was welcomed by a irate Kibum, complete with blue apron and spatula tapping menacingly on his thigh.
"I thought I told you to inform us if you're Staying. Out. Late." Ground out a very angry Kibum. Jonghyun scratched his head and grinned guiltily. "Sorry ~ but I have some important news!"
Kibum looked curious for a second, and then scoffed. "You're just trying to distract me from my righteous anger." Jonghyun waved him away.
"Where's the rest?" he asked, while shrugging off his coat and searching for food in the fridge.
"OUCH! Kibum! I'm hungry ~"
"It's your own fault for coming home late. Everyone had dinner and is now asleep."
"Already? WITHOUT ME?!? Meanies ~"
Kibum shot him a glare. "We DID try calling you, but I guess SOMEONE was too busy FUCKING their GIRLFRIEND to notice, hm?" Jonghyun looked ashamed.
"Oh." He said in a small voice. Kibum sighed. "I did save some dinner for you, idiot dino-boy. Here."
After washing the dishes (with much ribbing of Jonghyun's 'date' with his girlfriend), they were about to go to bed when-
"Jjong! I thought you were going to tell me something important!" Kibum whispered as they climbed into their bunks. Jonghyun looked adorably confused for a moment and then remembered.
"Oh yeah. I have to tell you all together though. So I guess you'll have to wiat until tomorrow ~" And saying that, he switched off the lights.
Before Jonghyun could fall asleep he heard muttering.
"...idiot dino-boy..."
Jonghyun smiled to himself. I really am an idiot for not realising earlier he thought before dreaming of crescent-eyed smiles.
I wanna leave but I'm afraid
That you don't even feel the same
And now I realize that she ain't you
Jonghyun could not shut his eyes. Because if he did, he would see Jinki flushed, cheeks pink and panting softly after they had finished their dance practice. Fuck. Stop thinking this. Stop this now! Jonghyun thought urgently, but it was too late. Jonghyun looked at his lap, let out a soft groan before picking himself up and saying,
"Guys, I need the bathroom. I'll be back soon!". Replies of "Why do you need to announce it, Jjong?", "Okay hyung" and "...that's not the kind of thing you tell to the public, hyung.." were heard. Jonghyun gave them a strained smile and practically ran off to the nearest bathroom. When he managed to make it into one of the stalls, he sat down on the closed toilet seat and sighed. Just thinking about Jinki made him go insane… how was he supposed to make it through anything without Jinki or the others finding out? Jonghyun's fingers inched towards his crotch, all the while imagining them to be Jinki's fingers. He wrapped his fingers around his shaft, his breath hitching and moaning softly, "Jinki-ah..." He came seconds later, imagining Jinki's flushed face, panting and out of breath, moaning Jonghyun-ah softly. Jonghyun sighed, wiped himself clean with tissues and flushed.
Outside the stall, Jinki was stunned. I must have misheard. There's no way... Jinki heard a creak, and before he could think of hiding himself or coming up with a valid excuse as to why exactly he was standing outside Jonghyun's stall without sounding like a pervert, Jonghyun was out. Standing in front of him. Well this is...awkward. They both looked at each other, then down, then back at each other. Before Jinki could say anything, Jonghyun practically bolted out of the toilets.
Way to go, Jinki. Way. To. Go. Jinki scolded himself. He hesitated, should he confront Jonghyun about... But before he could think of anything else, Jonghyun's guilty, pained face swam in front of his eyes, and Jinki knew he had to find him and talk to him. He turned and walked away.
I've been sleeping out
For quite some nights now
It's not the same in my bed
Jonghyun realises he hasn't been home in forever. Well, at least judging by the number of texts, missed calls and threatening voicemails left by Kibum were anything to go by.
"YAH!! PICK UP YOUR GODDAMN PHONE KIM JONGHYUN!! When I get my hands on you..." Jonghyun smiled and suddenly sobered. He remembered Kibum's cursed spatula.
Jonghyun sighed, for what seemed like the millionth time that night. He couldn't figure out how to face Jinki after that embarrassing episode and had resorted to just plain avoiding him at all costs. It didn't help that they still had promotions left or photoshoots; Jinki would try and corner him and he would run off. Jonghyun sighed again. He remembered Jinki's hurt face. What am I afraid of? he thought.
But if she found out what's going on in my head
It'll be all bad, have me right back
But you don't understand it girl
Jinki was determined to talk to Jonghyun. Even if the other brushed him off, like he was doing for the past god-knows-how-many weeks. He ran a hand through his hair in frustration and immediately recoiled; the stylist would murder him for that. Jinki walked over to the stylist who was praising Minho's complexion and said,
"Um, noona, I'm really sorry but..." The stylist turned around immediately and narrowed her eyes at him.
"LEE JINKI!! It took me so long to get your hair perfect and look what you've done to it!" she yelled at him, while dragging him away, Minho, Taemin and Kibum looking on and unable to control their laughter.
Jonghyun watched them fondly, a smile crinkling the corners of his mouth. “You’re an idiot, you know.” Kibum murmured, from somewhere to his right.
“Wha..Bummie! Don’t creep up on me like that! You nearly gave me a heart attack!” Jonghyun mock-scolded Kibum and dramatically clutched at his chest. Kibum rolled his eyes and gave a small smile.
“You’re worrying him by avoiding him, you know. Just tell him already, for God’s sakes!” Jonghyun’s smile faltered. Kibum knew?!? The whole time?!? What if he… Kibum rolled his eyes again.
“God, Jjong. I’m not that harsh. Besides, this is something you should tell him yourself, yes?” Kibum said, and poked Jonghyun in the shoulder.
“Yeah…you’re right. But…IthinkhelikesMinho!” Jonghyun mumbled, cheeks reddening. Kibum smirked and said,
“Oh, I’m sorry Jjong. What was that?” Jonghyun glared at him. “I’m not repeating it.” He ground out. Kibum shook his head and laughed. “Just talk to him, you idiot Dino.”
Jonghyun scratched his head sheepishly. “But. I’m afraid he won’t want to-”
“Oh for crying out loud, just do as I say. Honestly, and you’re supposed to be the hyung…” Jonghyun gave Kibum a mock-glare for that and shoved him playfully. This started a mini-shoving war, with Kibum being the winner.
“Promise me you’ll go talk to him. Please?” Jonghyun raised his eyebrows. Kibum saying please? Wow, Jinki hyung must have really been worried. Jonghyun felt guilt clawing at his insides.
“Alright. I promise.”
When she touches me, I'm wishing that they were your hands
And when I'm with her its only 'bout the sex
With you I had a bad romance
And if I could, just trade her in I would
'Cause nobody compares to ya
Jonghyun pinned Jinki to the nearest wall. Jinki didn't understand how to react, and if he did, whether it would be the right kind of reaction for this situation. He decided to do nothing and let Jonghyun begin.
"I broke up with her, hyung." Jonghyun began in a low voice. Jinki was surprised, to say the least. I thought they were happy together. Why...? and before he could ask, almost as if Jonghyun had read his mind, he stopped him with a finger on his lips.
"Let me finish, please, hyung." he said, voice devoid of emotion. Jinki felt a sense of apprehension. Kibum would be so much better at this... he sighed and indicated for Jonghyun to elaborate. Jonghyun looked into Jinki's eyes, took a measured breath and said,
"I went out with her so I could forget about you, hyung." Jinki was sure he had suddenly developed hearing difficulties due to excessive practice, variety shows and concert performances. There was no way Jonghyun just said that. I have officially gone mad...
"It was so difficult, hyung. I tried everything. Believe me when I say that,” and at that, Jonghyun gave a bitter laugh. “I just- I couldn’t do it anymore, hyung. I couldn’t keep lying to myself or to her. And anyway, she started to notice something was up.”
Jinki knew he should do something. Like pat Jonghyun on the back or hug him. Or something. Anything. Instead, he stood there, imitating a fish, his mouth opening and closing every few seconds. Jonghyun sighed against Jinki and he blushed as he felt Jonghyun’s warm breath caress his cheek. This was not what I was expecting. This is so much better…wait, what? Jinki mentally slapped himself. He wasn’t about to take advantage of Jonghyun’s condition...was he?
“Honestly hyung. It was just the sex. Just the relief I got with her. I thought I could forget about you if I pushed you away but all I did was to make you worry. I’m really sorry about that.” Jonghyun exhaled, hanging his head, unable to face Jinki or the disgust that he was sure was on Jinki’s face. After a tense moment when Jinki didn’t say anything, Jonghyun barely suppressed his tears and turned away from Jinki. “I’m sorry about this hyung. I’m so sor-” Jonghyun was unable to finish his sentence as a pair of soft, slightly chapped lips pressed themselves against his. There was only one coherent thought in Jonghyun’s head, before he lost all control. Wha- Jinki hyung likes me back! I’m dreaming. This is impossible. He wrapped one hand around Jinki's waist, and with the other, angled Jinki’s head to kiss him deeply and groaned when Jinki automatically opened his mouth and shyly licked Jonghyun's lips, asking for entrance. Who was he to deny Jinki anything? He memorised every inch of Jinki's mouth, sucked on his lips until he was sure they were bruised and coaxed many musical moans from Jinki. After pulling back due to lack of air, Jonghyun rested his forehead on Jinki's, and felt slight pride at his handiwork. Jinki looked throughly debauched, cheeks red, hair all over the place, lips the colour of crushed roses and chocolate brown eyes glazed over. Perfect, Jonghyun thought. "Hyung, wha- why did you do that?" Jonghyun asked after regaining his breath. Jinki rolled his eyes, smiled shyly and said,
"Because I love you too, you idiot." Jonghyun looked like he'd been hit by a ray of sunshine. He couldn't stop the foolishly large grin from creeping onto his face. He placed small kisses, punctuated with 'I love you's all over Jinki's face and hair, making Jinki giggle and suddenly sober.
"Wait. We have to tell the others." Jonghyun nodded absentmindedly, kissing and nibbling Jinki's jawline and making Jinki gasp. "Later. Now I want to make up for lost time, yeobo."
I think I better let her go
'Cause I can't leave you alone
Every day that I'm with her, all I want is you
I wanna leave but I'm afraid
That you don't even feel the same
And now I realize that she ain't you
Author's note: 1.This is my first time writing a fanfic, so apologies for it not being very good :| 2. Please read and review, and constructive criticism would be nice ~ ^.^ 3. This was so much better in my head... 4. The lyrics are from Chris Brown's She ain't you. 5. HAPPY BIRTHDAY ONEW ~ ^.^
Author letsflywannabe
Rating: PG - 15
Summary: Jonghyun realises where he truly belongs.
Italics are song lyrics and Jonghyun/Onew's thoughts.
You make it hard for me to see somebody else
I'm calling her your name
Yea its messed up, cause I'm thinkin 'bout you
It's your fault babe
Jonghyun walks down the dimly lit street. His breath comes out in little puffs that curled in the air, and he watches them disappear and sighs. How was he supposed to face Jinki? Sure, he had the girl of his dreams but it didn't feel...right. He was supposed to see fireworks behind his eyelids or some cheesy shit like that when they kissed. Instead, it just felt...awkward. Misplaced. Jonghyun's face burned with embarrassment when he recalled a particular moment.
"Come on Jjong! Seriously, you're THIS shy?" she laughed merrily and leaned closer. Jonghyun leaned closer and...hesitated. Why was he hesitating? Was it because he expected to see eyes crinkled with laughter and that adorable grin? What? NO..no way! Jinki hyung and I are just friends! Then why did he feel faintly ashamed when he told the guys he was dating her? Was it because of the moment he thought he saw Jinki's face fall for a second...?
"...YAH, JONGHYUN! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?? HELLO? ANYONE HOME??" she waved her arms in front of him and looked annoyed. "You always space out like this when we even come close to being intimate!" she pouted, crossed her arms and turned away. Jonghyun snapped back and grinned sheepishly, scratching the back of his head.
"Sorry jagiya ~ " He pouted and within seconds, she was cooing at him, intimacy troubles all forgotten. Whew,that was close. And it was at that moment, once again his brain decided to remind him that he'd much rather prefer being laughed at by Jinki for his ridiculous puffer fish pout and feel weirdly warm and tingly when he'd have to pat him on the back after Jinki's excessive laughing fit.
Well fuck. He just couldn't get away from Jinki, could he?
I never wanted us to break up
No not this way
But you don't understand it girl
Jonghyun didn't reply when Jinki asked him whether he was alright. Jonghyun didn't reply when Jinki asked him if he'd like to have dinner together. Jonghyun was at his limit when Jinki cornered him after their performance and demanded to know what was wrong. "Jjong, if it's the fan girls, don't worry about them. They'll understand, you'll see!" topped off with his crinkly-eyed smile was just the last fucking straw. Jonghyun shoved Jinki away.
"I'm alright hyung. Just leave me the fuck alone for 5 minutes, will you?" he said and walked off without a backwards glance.
"...I don't understand. I..." Jinki felt like his world had suddenly shifted off its axis. He leaned against the wall and tried willing the tears away.
"Hyung, it's okay to cry sometimes, you know." A pair of slightly muscular arms wound around him. Minho-ah. Jinki sniffed into Minho's shoulder.
"I'm not crying! I have allergies...to...things..." Jinki declared. Minho rolled his eyes.
"Of course hyung. I believe you." Jinki pulled away from Minho's embrace and gave him a watery smile.
"Thank you Minho-ah. I..needed that." Minho just smiled at him.
"You sure you're okay, hyung?"
"I'll be okay, Minho. Now shoo, Donghae-hyung was looking for you!" Jinki said with his trademark crinkly-eyed smile.
Jonghyun slammed his fist against the door. So you go to Minho now? He took a deep breath and calmed himself. He rang the second number on his speed-dial.
"Hey jagiya ~"
"Hey baby ~ you haven't called me in a while!"
"I know sweetheart, I've just been so busy. I was wondering if you were free tomorrow evening.."
"Yeah, I'm free tomorrow, why?"
"Well I was thinking about making up for all the dates we didn't have ~ what does my jagiya want to do?"
"Really? I want to stay in and spend time with you, baby ~"
"Alright then. I'll see you tomorrow?"
"For sure, baby ~ love you!"
"You too"
At least he had some distraction from his messed-up mind. Jonghyun sauntered away, a small smile on his face.
Jinki didn't understand why hearing Jonghyun talk to her made him feel strange. I feel like I have heartburn. Strange. I didn't eat anything unusual. I slept properly too... He shook his head to clear his thoughts and hurried behind Taemin. "Come on guys! Don't dawdle! We have a schedule to keep to!" Kibum yelled.
When she touches me, I'm wishing that they were your hands
And when I'm with her its only 'bout the sex
With you I had a bad romance
She moaned and Jonghyun felt the vibration shoot straight into his cock. He gasped."Ahh..I'm so clo-" and he came into her mouth. She swallowed and looked up at him through her lashes. And all this time, it took just the thought of having Jinki that drove him over the edge. She pushed herself up against him and Jonghyun felt a stab of revulsion. Nevertheless, he lubed up his fingers and inserted them, one at a time into her, until she had her head thrown back and moaned his name.
"Jong-ah...Jonghyun!" He watched her come dispassionately and dropped a perfunctory kiss on her lips, withdrew his fingers and went to take a shower.
And if I could, just trade her in I would
'Cause nobody compares to ya
"You know, when we're close...that's when you seem furthest away, Jjong."
Jonghyun sighed. How was he supposed to explain that? Tell her that he wanted Jinki instead of her? Wanted to make Jinki come undone with his fingers and his lips and... He'd had enough. Jonghyun sighed again.
"Baby we need to talk..."
I think I better let her go
'Cause I can't leave you alone
Every day that I'm with her, all I want is you
Jonghyun knocked on their door. He was welcomed by a irate Kibum, complete with blue apron and spatula tapping menacingly on his thigh.
"I thought I told you to inform us if you're Staying. Out. Late." Ground out a very angry Kibum. Jonghyun scratched his head and grinned guiltily. "Sorry ~ but I have some important news!"
Kibum looked curious for a second, and then scoffed. "You're just trying to distract me from my righteous anger." Jonghyun waved him away.
"Where's the rest?" he asked, while shrugging off his coat and searching for food in the fridge.
"OUCH! Kibum! I'm hungry ~"
"It's your own fault for coming home late. Everyone had dinner and is now asleep."
"Already? WITHOUT ME?!? Meanies ~"
Kibum shot him a glare. "We DID try calling you, but I guess SOMEONE was too busy FUCKING their GIRLFRIEND to notice, hm?" Jonghyun looked ashamed.
"Oh." He said in a small voice. Kibum sighed. "I did save some dinner for you, idiot dino-boy. Here."
After washing the dishes (with much ribbing of Jonghyun's 'date' with his girlfriend), they were about to go to bed when-
"Jjong! I thought you were going to tell me something important!" Kibum whispered as they climbed into their bunks. Jonghyun looked adorably confused for a moment and then remembered.
"Oh yeah. I have to tell you all together though. So I guess you'll have to wiat until tomorrow ~" And saying that, he switched off the lights.
Before Jonghyun could fall asleep he heard muttering.
"...idiot dino-boy..."
Jonghyun smiled to himself. I really am an idiot for not realising earlier he thought before dreaming of crescent-eyed smiles.
I wanna leave but I'm afraid
That you don't even feel the same
And now I realize that she ain't you
Jonghyun could not shut his eyes. Because if he did, he would see Jinki flushed, cheeks pink and panting softly after they had finished their dance practice. Fuck. Stop thinking this. Stop this now! Jonghyun thought urgently, but it was too late. Jonghyun looked at his lap, let out a soft groan before picking himself up and saying,
"Guys, I need the bathroom. I'll be back soon!". Replies of "Why do you need to announce it, Jjong?", "Okay hyung" and "...that's not the kind of thing you tell to the public, hyung.." were heard. Jonghyun gave them a strained smile and practically ran off to the nearest bathroom. When he managed to make it into one of the stalls, he sat down on the closed toilet seat and sighed. Just thinking about Jinki made him go insane… how was he supposed to make it through anything without Jinki or the others finding out? Jonghyun's fingers inched towards his crotch, all the while imagining them to be Jinki's fingers. He wrapped his fingers around his shaft, his breath hitching and moaning softly, "Jinki-ah..." He came seconds later, imagining Jinki's flushed face, panting and out of breath, moaning Jonghyun-ah softly. Jonghyun sighed, wiped himself clean with tissues and flushed.
Outside the stall, Jinki was stunned. I must have misheard. There's no way... Jinki heard a creak, and before he could think of hiding himself or coming up with a valid excuse as to why exactly he was standing outside Jonghyun's stall without sounding like a pervert, Jonghyun was out. Standing in front of him. Well this is...awkward. They both looked at each other, then down, then back at each other. Before Jinki could say anything, Jonghyun practically bolted out of the toilets.
Way to go, Jinki. Way. To. Go. Jinki scolded himself. He hesitated, should he confront Jonghyun about... But before he could think of anything else, Jonghyun's guilty, pained face swam in front of his eyes, and Jinki knew he had to find him and talk to him. He turned and walked away.
I've been sleeping out
For quite some nights now
It's not the same in my bed
Jonghyun realises he hasn't been home in forever. Well, at least judging by the number of texts, missed calls and threatening voicemails left by Kibum were anything to go by.
"YAH!! PICK UP YOUR GODDAMN PHONE KIM JONGHYUN!! When I get my hands on you..." Jonghyun smiled and suddenly sobered. He remembered Kibum's cursed spatula.
Jonghyun sighed, for what seemed like the millionth time that night. He couldn't figure out how to face Jinki after that embarrassing episode and had resorted to just plain avoiding him at all costs. It didn't help that they still had promotions left or photoshoots; Jinki would try and corner him and he would run off. Jonghyun sighed again. He remembered Jinki's hurt face. What am I afraid of? he thought.
But if she found out what's going on in my head
It'll be all bad, have me right back
But you don't understand it girl
Jinki was determined to talk to Jonghyun. Even if the other brushed him off, like he was doing for the past god-knows-how-many weeks. He ran a hand through his hair in frustration and immediately recoiled; the stylist would murder him for that. Jinki walked over to the stylist who was praising Minho's complexion and said,
"Um, noona, I'm really sorry but..." The stylist turned around immediately and narrowed her eyes at him.
"LEE JINKI!! It took me so long to get your hair perfect and look what you've done to it!" she yelled at him, while dragging him away, Minho, Taemin and Kibum looking on and unable to control their laughter.
Jonghyun watched them fondly, a smile crinkling the corners of his mouth. “You’re an idiot, you know.” Kibum murmured, from somewhere to his right.
“Wha..Bummie! Don’t creep up on me like that! You nearly gave me a heart attack!” Jonghyun mock-scolded Kibum and dramatically clutched at his chest. Kibum rolled his eyes and gave a small smile.
“You’re worrying him by avoiding him, you know. Just tell him already, for God’s sakes!” Jonghyun’s smile faltered. Kibum knew?!? The whole time?!? What if he… Kibum rolled his eyes again.
“God, Jjong. I’m not that harsh. Besides, this is something you should tell him yourself, yes?” Kibum said, and poked Jonghyun in the shoulder.
“Yeah…you’re right. But…IthinkhelikesMinho!” Jonghyun mumbled, cheeks reddening. Kibum smirked and said,
“Oh, I’m sorry Jjong. What was that?” Jonghyun glared at him. “I’m not repeating it.” He ground out. Kibum shook his head and laughed. “Just talk to him, you idiot Dino.”
Jonghyun scratched his head sheepishly. “But. I’m afraid he won’t want to-”
“Oh for crying out loud, just do as I say. Honestly, and you’re supposed to be the hyung…” Jonghyun gave Kibum a mock-glare for that and shoved him playfully. This started a mini-shoving war, with Kibum being the winner.
“Promise me you’ll go talk to him. Please?” Jonghyun raised his eyebrows. Kibum saying please? Wow, Jinki hyung must have really been worried. Jonghyun felt guilt clawing at his insides.
“Alright. I promise.”
When she touches me, I'm wishing that they were your hands
And when I'm with her its only 'bout the sex
With you I had a bad romance
And if I could, just trade her in I would
'Cause nobody compares to ya
Jonghyun pinned Jinki to the nearest wall. Jinki didn't understand how to react, and if he did, whether it would be the right kind of reaction for this situation. He decided to do nothing and let Jonghyun begin.
"I broke up with her, hyung." Jonghyun began in a low voice. Jinki was surprised, to say the least. I thought they were happy together. Why...? and before he could ask, almost as if Jonghyun had read his mind, he stopped him with a finger on his lips.
"Let me finish, please, hyung." he said, voice devoid of emotion. Jinki felt a sense of apprehension. Kibum would be so much better at this... he sighed and indicated for Jonghyun to elaborate. Jonghyun looked into Jinki's eyes, took a measured breath and said,
"I went out with her so I could forget about you, hyung." Jinki was sure he had suddenly developed hearing difficulties due to excessive practice, variety shows and concert performances. There was no way Jonghyun just said that. I have officially gone mad...
"It was so difficult, hyung. I tried everything. Believe me when I say that,” and at that, Jonghyun gave a bitter laugh. “I just- I couldn’t do it anymore, hyung. I couldn’t keep lying to myself or to her. And anyway, she started to notice something was up.”
Jinki knew he should do something. Like pat Jonghyun on the back or hug him. Or something. Anything. Instead, he stood there, imitating a fish, his mouth opening and closing every few seconds. Jonghyun sighed against Jinki and he blushed as he felt Jonghyun’s warm breath caress his cheek. This was not what I was expecting. This is so much better…wait, what? Jinki mentally slapped himself. He wasn’t about to take advantage of Jonghyun’s condition...was he?
“Honestly hyung. It was just the sex. Just the relief I got with her. I thought I could forget about you if I pushed you away but all I did was to make you worry. I’m really sorry about that.” Jonghyun exhaled, hanging his head, unable to face Jinki or the disgust that he was sure was on Jinki’s face. After a tense moment when Jinki didn’t say anything, Jonghyun barely suppressed his tears and turned away from Jinki. “I’m sorry about this hyung. I’m so sor-” Jonghyun was unable to finish his sentence as a pair of soft, slightly chapped lips pressed themselves against his. There was only one coherent thought in Jonghyun’s head, before he lost all control. Wha- Jinki hyung likes me back! I’m dreaming. This is impossible. He wrapped one hand around Jinki's waist, and with the other, angled Jinki’s head to kiss him deeply and groaned when Jinki automatically opened his mouth and shyly licked Jonghyun's lips, asking for entrance. Who was he to deny Jinki anything? He memorised every inch of Jinki's mouth, sucked on his lips until he was sure they were bruised and coaxed many musical moans from Jinki. After pulling back due to lack of air, Jonghyun rested his forehead on Jinki's, and felt slight pride at his handiwork. Jinki looked throughly debauched, cheeks red, hair all over the place, lips the colour of crushed roses and chocolate brown eyes glazed over. Perfect, Jonghyun thought. "Hyung, wha- why did you do that?" Jonghyun asked after regaining his breath. Jinki rolled his eyes, smiled shyly and said,
"Because I love you too, you idiot." Jonghyun looked like he'd been hit by a ray of sunshine. He couldn't stop the foolishly large grin from creeping onto his face. He placed small kisses, punctuated with 'I love you's all over Jinki's face and hair, making Jinki giggle and suddenly sober.
"Wait. We have to tell the others." Jonghyun nodded absentmindedly, kissing and nibbling Jinki's jawline and making Jinki gasp. "Later. Now I want to make up for lost time, yeobo."
I think I better let her go
'Cause I can't leave you alone
Every day that I'm with her, all I want is you
I wanna leave but I'm afraid
That you don't even feel the same
And now I realize that she ain't you
Author's note: 1.This is my first time writing a fanfic, so apologies for it not being very good :| 2. Please read and review, and constructive criticism would be nice ~ ^.^ 3. This was so much better in my head... 4. The lyrics are from Chris Brown's She ain't you. 5. HAPPY BIRTHDAY ONEW ~ ^.^