(no subject)
Things are going pretty well I suppose. Can't really complain.
I've been hanging out with a bunch of people here at school, a lot of friends now I guess, but I still feel that I'm somehow an outsider to all of it, and I'm still falling into depression more than I should, which sucks. But I guess that's kinda just the way that things go.
I keep on thinking that I have a cold, but I don't think that I do. It's ridiculous.
I don't even know what I am anymore really.
I had a dream last night where I was asked to join the Rolling Stones as a guitarist. I accepted, and went with Mick Jagger and Keith Richards to play in a subway in NYC. I get there, and I realized I don't have a guitar. So I run out of the subway, and suddenly, I lose a tooth in the back left of my mouth. So then i called my mom and told her about my tooth, and said that this time it wasn't a dream. This time it was real. So I continue onto an apartment, which has my room from home in it. I grab my esquire, and then I leave. I then end up on a small beach, and swim across a lake to go play with The Rolling Stones on a small island in the middle. And then I woke up.
So because of that I looked up was losing teeth in dreams means, and apparently it means I'm self-conscious about my appearance, or I'm about to encounter a big change in my life.
I know the first is true, but I'm hoping that the second one happens too.
aghhhh why can't I say anything to the girl that I like!?
I know I sound like I'm 11, but I'm terrible with these things. Every time I've made a move I've fucked things up. Every time. It's getting frustrating after trying to be with different people for about 6 years, and then being rejected every time.
I guess I'll do a survey.
Basics
Name:: Matt
Age:: 19
Height:: 6'1" - 6'2"....
Hair Color:: Brown
Eye Color:: Blue
School Life
What's your school's mascot?: Owls!
School color(s)?: Blue and White. I didn't have to change anything from high school to college. Nice.
G.P.A.?: 3.34, and probably staying that way
Who is your favorite teacher?: Middle School: McKay, High School: Sidman, College: O'Connell
What do they teach?: Middle: Everything, High: History, College: English
Is this your favorite class?: They were.
Internet
Do you use any instant messengers?: Mmmhmm.
If so, which ones?: AIM
About how many hours a day do you spend online?: Too many. Toooo manny.
Do you have a digital camera?: yep
If so, do you post pictures of yourself online?: Only nude.
Music
Do you play any instruments?: yeah
If so, what one(s)?: Guitar, Bass, Drums, a little piano.
3 Favorite Genres Of Music:: Rock, Electronica, Folk
3 Favorite Bands:: The Hold Steady, Ted Leo + The Pharmacists, Radiohead
Do you go to concerts and/or shows?: Oh yeah. Despite my incredible lack of money.
What is the most you've ever spent on a concert/show?: $250. Oh the police.
What is the least you've ever spent?: free
Do you think buying merch at a concert then wearing it there is corny?: Not when I was younger, but now I do.
Do you listen to any bands that you'd be ashamed to admit to listening to?: Kinda? I still listen to Blink-182 and Fall Out Boy, so there go my scene points. But what can I say, they're good catchy pop tunes.
Did you notice the grammatical error in question 29?: I couldn't give a fuck. It's a journal survey, not a text book.
Word Association
Blue:: eyes
Camera:: lens
Boy:: girl
Pretty:: bird
Pants:: jeans
Music:: Savior
God:: "Jesus rolled his eyes when his Dad told Jesus Jokes."
Sweater:: No.
Live Journal:: MMmhmm
MTV:: I met John Norris once.
Labels:
Do you think labels are dumb?: On people? Eh. I could really careless.
Why or why not?: I really don't care.
What do people label you as?: I dunno. Suggestions? Indie Kid I guess?
How/Why did you get this label?: Because I'm a ridiculous music geek, and wear salvation army clothes and obscure band T-Shirts.
Which Is Worse?
Physical Pain/Emotional Pain?: emotional
Blink-182/Good Charlotte?: I still love Blink.
Being Deaf/Being Blind?: Deaf. I'd probably just commit suicide. Not kidding.
Being Bored/Rushing around because you have too much to do?: Depends on both.
Losing your dominant leg/Losing your dominant arm?: Arm. No Guitar = No Life.
Love
Do you believe theres a difference between "love" and "in love"?: wouldn't know.
Is it better to have loved and lossed than to have never loved at all?: Never had either.
Are you romantic?: Well I try my best.
Are you in a relationship now?: No, but not for lack of trying. Just for lack of nerves.
If so, for how long?: Ballllls.
If not, how long have you been single?: Year and a couple of weeks. But I don't even count it as a relationship. Basically we hooked up for 2 weeks. That's it.
Are you a virgin?: Mmhmm.
What song describes your love life right now?: John Cage - "4'33""
Ranomosity
War: Good or Bad?: Depends on the reasons. But in general I'm not a fan.
What do you think of designer labels?: I don't.
Who's skankier: Britney Spears or Paris Hilton?: I still don't care.
What is it with guys and cars?: People like what they like. I'm obsessive about Guitars and Music, who am I to judge someone else.
Do you sing?: I try.
If so, what part (Soprano 1,Alto 2, et cetera)?: No idea. But I have a pretty deep voice.
Kiss or hug?: I miss kissing. :-(
What color is your room?: MMmmmm Concrete White Walls.
How old is your mom?: 46
Black and white or color photos?: It depends on the subject matter. Artistically, Black and White, but for just memory's sake Color.
Who cuts your hair?: I haven't had a hair cut in 7 or 8 months....
What color is your toothbrush?: Grey
What color is your hair brush?: Green and White
What kind of hair products do you use?: Shampoo and Conditioner...
Is K-Mart just the poor man's Wal-Mart?: Is there a lower form of white trash than wal-mart white trash?
Are you sXe?: Well I can't drink. But I do likey the smokey.
Are you sexy?: What do you think?
What color to people tells you looks nice on you?: I don't get complimented on my looks. I'm not surprised.
What color do you think looks nice on you?: I dunno. I'm pretty content with my pallet of Black, Blue, and Red.
Clothes shopping or grocery shopping?: Depends on the day and location.
Who do you sit with at lunch with?: Breakfast and Lunch are usually by myself. I do dinner with Brian, Dan and the girls.
Do you like the sound of your own voice when you hear it played back?: My voice is stupidly low.
Who has the nicest speaking voice that you know?: I dunno. I don't really care.
What is the website for one of your favorite bands?: www.theholdsteady.com
Do you prefer to date people younger, older, or the same age as you?: Same-ish age I guess. like, within 2 or 3 years.
Who was the last person you hung out with?: Brian, Dan, and Nick.
What did you and that person do?: We watched Reservoir Dogs.
Do you use internet shorthand (i.e. "lol", "brb", "jk", et cetera)?:I occasionally use brb. But other than that, I'm not illiterate.
How often do you bathe?: Really not enough. 1 to 2 times a week is way too little.
Are you a people-pleaser?: In general yes. But I also have a firm love of pissing people off, especially about morality questions.
Do you dye your hair regularly?: not in about 3 years. I'd like too again, but I have too much hair.
What about your eyebrows?: no
Do you wear makeup?: Nope.
If you answered "yes", to #96, are you female?: .....
Do you buy CDs edited or unedited?: unedited. But we get a bunch shipped to us edited, which kinda blows.
Can you beatbox?: Not well. I can do a pretty damn good bass drum though....
Does your mom like the song "Hey Ya" by OutKast?: Probably no. Not at all.
-Matt.
I've been hanging out with a bunch of people here at school, a lot of friends now I guess, but I still feel that I'm somehow an outsider to all of it, and I'm still falling into depression more than I should, which sucks. But I guess that's kinda just the way that things go.
I keep on thinking that I have a cold, but I don't think that I do. It's ridiculous.
I don't even know what I am anymore really.
I had a dream last night where I was asked to join the Rolling Stones as a guitarist. I accepted, and went with Mick Jagger and Keith Richards to play in a subway in NYC. I get there, and I realized I don't have a guitar. So I run out of the subway, and suddenly, I lose a tooth in the back left of my mouth. So then i called my mom and told her about my tooth, and said that this time it wasn't a dream. This time it was real. So I continue onto an apartment, which has my room from home in it. I grab my esquire, and then I leave. I then end up on a small beach, and swim across a lake to go play with The Rolling Stones on a small island in the middle. And then I woke up.
So because of that I looked up was losing teeth in dreams means, and apparently it means I'm self-conscious about my appearance, or I'm about to encounter a big change in my life.
I know the first is true, but I'm hoping that the second one happens too.
aghhhh why can't I say anything to the girl that I like!?
I know I sound like I'm 11, but I'm terrible with these things. Every time I've made a move I've fucked things up. Every time. It's getting frustrating after trying to be with different people for about 6 years, and then being rejected every time.
I guess I'll do a survey.
Basics
Name:: Matt
Age:: 19
Height:: 6'1" - 6'2"....
Hair Color:: Brown
Eye Color:: Blue
School Life
What's your school's mascot?: Owls!
School color(s)?: Blue and White. I didn't have to change anything from high school to college. Nice.
G.P.A.?: 3.34, and probably staying that way
Who is your favorite teacher?: Middle School: McKay, High School: Sidman, College: O'Connell
What do they teach?: Middle: Everything, High: History, College: English
Is this your favorite class?: They were.
Internet
Do you use any instant messengers?: Mmmhmm.
If so, which ones?: AIM
About how many hours a day do you spend online?: Too many. Toooo manny.
Do you have a digital camera?: yep
If so, do you post pictures of yourself online?: Only nude.
Music
Do you play any instruments?: yeah
If so, what one(s)?: Guitar, Bass, Drums, a little piano.
3 Favorite Genres Of Music:: Rock, Electronica, Folk
3 Favorite Bands:: The Hold Steady, Ted Leo + The Pharmacists, Radiohead
Do you go to concerts and/or shows?: Oh yeah. Despite my incredible lack of money.
What is the most you've ever spent on a concert/show?: $250. Oh the police.
What is the least you've ever spent?: free
Do you think buying merch at a concert then wearing it there is corny?: Not when I was younger, but now I do.
Do you listen to any bands that you'd be ashamed to admit to listening to?: Kinda? I still listen to Blink-182 and Fall Out Boy, so there go my scene points. But what can I say, they're good catchy pop tunes.
Did you notice the grammatical error in question 29?: I couldn't give a fuck. It's a journal survey, not a text book.
Word Association
Blue:: eyes
Camera:: lens
Boy:: girl
Pretty:: bird
Pants:: jeans
Music:: Savior
God:: "Jesus rolled his eyes when his Dad told Jesus Jokes."
Sweater:: No.
Live Journal:: MMmhmm
MTV:: I met John Norris once.
Labels:
Do you think labels are dumb?: On people? Eh. I could really careless.
Why or why not?: I really don't care.
What do people label you as?: I dunno. Suggestions? Indie Kid I guess?
How/Why did you get this label?: Because I'm a ridiculous music geek, and wear salvation army clothes and obscure band T-Shirts.
Which Is Worse?
Physical Pain/Emotional Pain?: emotional
Blink-182/Good Charlotte?: I still love Blink.
Being Deaf/Being Blind?: Deaf. I'd probably just commit suicide. Not kidding.
Being Bored/Rushing around because you have too much to do?: Depends on both.
Losing your dominant leg/Losing your dominant arm?: Arm. No Guitar = No Life.
Love
Do you believe theres a difference between "love" and "in love"?: wouldn't know.
Is it better to have loved and lossed than to have never loved at all?: Never had either.
Are you romantic?: Well I try my best.
Are you in a relationship now?: No, but not for lack of trying. Just for lack of nerves.
If so, for how long?: Ballllls.
If not, how long have you been single?: Year and a couple of weeks. But I don't even count it as a relationship. Basically we hooked up for 2 weeks. That's it.
Are you a virgin?: Mmhmm.
What song describes your love life right now?: John Cage - "4'33""
Ranomosity
War: Good or Bad?: Depends on the reasons. But in general I'm not a fan.
What do you think of designer labels?: I don't.
Who's skankier: Britney Spears or Paris Hilton?: I still don't care.
What is it with guys and cars?: People like what they like. I'm obsessive about Guitars and Music, who am I to judge someone else.
Do you sing?: I try.
If so, what part (Soprano 1,Alto 2, et cetera)?: No idea. But I have a pretty deep voice.
Kiss or hug?: I miss kissing. :-(
What color is your room?: MMmmmm Concrete White Walls.
How old is your mom?: 46
Black and white or color photos?: It depends on the subject matter. Artistically, Black and White, but for just memory's sake Color.
Who cuts your hair?: I haven't had a hair cut in 7 or 8 months....
What color is your toothbrush?: Grey
What color is your hair brush?: Green and White
What kind of hair products do you use?: Shampoo and Conditioner...
Is K-Mart just the poor man's Wal-Mart?: Is there a lower form of white trash than wal-mart white trash?
Are you sXe?: Well I can't drink. But I do likey the smokey.
Are you sexy?: What do you think?
What color to people tells you looks nice on you?: I don't get complimented on my looks. I'm not surprised.
What color do you think looks nice on you?: I dunno. I'm pretty content with my pallet of Black, Blue, and Red.
Clothes shopping or grocery shopping?: Depends on the day and location.
Who do you sit with at lunch with?: Breakfast and Lunch are usually by myself. I do dinner with Brian, Dan and the girls.
Do you like the sound of your own voice when you hear it played back?: My voice is stupidly low.
Who has the nicest speaking voice that you know?: I dunno. I don't really care.
What is the website for one of your favorite bands?: www.theholdsteady.com
Do you prefer to date people younger, older, or the same age as you?: Same-ish age I guess. like, within 2 or 3 years.
Who was the last person you hung out with?: Brian, Dan, and Nick.
What did you and that person do?: We watched Reservoir Dogs.
Do you use internet shorthand (i.e. "lol", "brb", "jk", et cetera)?:I occasionally use brb. But other than that, I'm not illiterate.
How often do you bathe?: Really not enough. 1 to 2 times a week is way too little.
Are you a people-pleaser?: In general yes. But I also have a firm love of pissing people off, especially about morality questions.
Do you dye your hair regularly?: not in about 3 years. I'd like too again, but I have too much hair.
What about your eyebrows?: no
Do you wear makeup?: Nope.
If you answered "yes", to #96, are you female?: .....
Do you buy CDs edited or unedited?: unedited. But we get a bunch shipped to us edited, which kinda blows.
Can you beatbox?: Not well. I can do a pretty damn good bass drum though....
Does your mom like the song "Hey Ya" by OutKast?: Probably no. Not at all.
-Matt.