It's coming and i can't stop it

[jonathon8adams]

okay so i have every reason in the world to be happy right, I've got awesome friends, my family seem to be treating me much better, I got a girl that knows how to treat me finally, and lots of other things, but everyday i seem to be getting more and more depressed. I find myself telling me to smile or say something funny, when in all reality i just want to go to my room and curl up in the corner by myself. i'm not happy, i have to work somethings out in my life. the thing is that i don't know what i need to work out. spring break will be good for me i think. i've got a few plans, going to the school to teach the broadcasting classes (because they hired a dumbass that dosn't know how to put a tape in a VCR), going to Lexington to visit some people, going to Georgetown to see some people, hanging out with my friends, visitng family, and the best part, being at home for a whole week with out worrying about anything. oh and i also get to babysit fiddy and Jannice (alicia's fish because she can't take them on the plane)

I also feel very guilty about something that i'm doing, i'm not saying what it is but it involves a hand full of people that i really care about and i just feel like shit, i should come clean but i can't and i don't know how. oh well i will figure it out eventually.