(no subject)
I'm house and dog sitting for my mom while she's in Florida.
It's 4AM and I can't sleep.
I went through old family albums last night. I saw a picture of my parents when they were in their twenties. It was weird. And pictures of my dad. It's funny, even in the memories I have from before he was sick, he always looks sick the way he did at the end when I think about him. And seeing picture of him before he was sick, from when I was still a kid, and even before then, it's just bizarre. It makes me think about life and the whole bigger picture. My mom still has a bottle of his aftershave and when I finished brushing my teeth I opened it and smelled it and remembered him like I never have before. They say scent is one of the strongest senses to stimulate the memory.
I actually went out tonight. Went to a friends house an actually had a (gasp) alcoholic beverage. Just one, mind you. Honestly, I can't remember the last drink I've had since before tonight. I know for sure at the Halloween party in October. But really, I don't remember one since then. Well, wait. Danny's getting married and I had a beer with the guys after we got fitted for tuxes. It also seems every time I drink (outside of beers with the guys) that I'm reminded somehow of why I don't drink in the first place. Don't get me wrong, we all have our vices, and I'm no exception. I'm not looking down on anyone just as I don't expect anyone to look down on me for smoking a little pot now and then. It's just lifestyle choices, I guess.
I'm bored. Even the dog is boring. And there's nothing on TV and it's bad enough that I watch High School Reunion on TVLand, but I refuse to let myself sink to level of watching reruns it that I've already seen.
It's 4AM and I can't sleep.
I went through old family albums last night. I saw a picture of my parents when they were in their twenties. It was weird. And pictures of my dad. It's funny, even in the memories I have from before he was sick, he always looks sick the way he did at the end when I think about him. And seeing picture of him before he was sick, from when I was still a kid, and even before then, it's just bizarre. It makes me think about life and the whole bigger picture. My mom still has a bottle of his aftershave and when I finished brushing my teeth I opened it and smelled it and remembered him like I never have before. They say scent is one of the strongest senses to stimulate the memory.
I actually went out tonight. Went to a friends house an actually had a (gasp) alcoholic beverage. Just one, mind you. Honestly, I can't remember the last drink I've had since before tonight. I know for sure at the Halloween party in October. But really, I don't remember one since then. Well, wait. Danny's getting married and I had a beer with the guys after we got fitted for tuxes. It also seems every time I drink (outside of beers with the guys) that I'm reminded somehow of why I don't drink in the first place. Don't get me wrong, we all have our vices, and I'm no exception. I'm not looking down on anyone just as I don't expect anyone to look down on me for smoking a little pot now and then. It's just lifestyle choices, I guess.
I'm bored. Even the dog is boring. And there's nothing on TV and it's bad enough that I watch High School Reunion on TVLand, but I refuse to let myself sink to level of watching reruns it that I've already seen.