(no subject)
It dumped down snow on London this week. It fell in big fluffy flakes and when I went out the back door to the alley for a smoke it fell on my jacket and didn't melt. It was like falling feathers.. it wasn't even cold and it didn't even seem wet. One of the stage hands went by me, an old woman who's been a manual labourer there for two of my lifetimes, and she said it was like the angels were shedding.
I stood out there puffing on my cigarette and half smiling toward the top of the alley. The sky was grey but nice and on the other side of the building traffic was backing up and planes were being delayed and cancelled and none of it touches me.. my life is contained. I wake up, I go to work, I party a little and come home. Sometimes I skip the partying when I'm feeling ill or tired or there's nothing interesting to do.. I think it's easy to get used to doing it even when there's nothing interesting to do so I at least try to make sure I have some good company. Lately I have.
I drink tea with honey in it for my throat and I can never get enough sleep. I couldn't do five more years of this without changing the way I live. I never think more than a day ahead lately.. that's on purpose. I've worked like a dog all my life and am still working like a dog so the least I can do is let the part of my brain that maps out my future goals be lazy for a month or so.
I made most of the entries in this journal private because they suck. It was either give this up altogether or try a new start again so I thought I'd do this one more time. hello, I'm Jon. I added everyone from the other journal because the people who keep me added after five weeks are the ones who really want to read what I have to say and those are the only ones I care about.
I stood out there puffing on my cigarette and half smiling toward the top of the alley. The sky was grey but nice and on the other side of the building traffic was backing up and planes were being delayed and cancelled and none of it touches me.. my life is contained. I wake up, I go to work, I party a little and come home. Sometimes I skip the partying when I'm feeling ill or tired or there's nothing interesting to do.. I think it's easy to get used to doing it even when there's nothing interesting to do so I at least try to make sure I have some good company. Lately I have.
I drink tea with honey in it for my throat and I can never get enough sleep. I couldn't do five more years of this without changing the way I live. I never think more than a day ahead lately.. that's on purpose. I've worked like a dog all my life and am still working like a dog so the least I can do is let the part of my brain that maps out my future goals be lazy for a month or so.
I made most of the entries in this journal private because they suck. It was either give this up altogether or try a new start again so I thought I'd do this one more time. hello, I'm Jon. I added everyone from the other journal because the people who keep me added after five weeks are the ones who really want to read what I have to say and those are the only ones I care about.