just remembered
back in highschool, the girl in front of me turned around and asked for a joke. i told her, "why do men shower?" she didn't know. "because peeing in the bath is nasty." she thought that was the grossest thing she ever heard and exclaim, "that's the grossest thing i ever heard!"
me: what? you don't pee in the shower?
her: eeewww. no.
me: so you pee in the bath?
dude to my left: eeeew, peeing in the bath? she's so gross.
dude to my right: yeah you are so nasty.
her: no, i don't pee while bathing. that's -
chick behind me: -so fucking gross!
dude all the way across the room that nobody has ever spoken to or even acknowledged: no way! i pee in the shower every time.
2 new girls and the two original girls: eeeeewwwwww!
idiot nobody likes: why are we talking about pee?
her, ignoring idiot: i'm going to be sick. you stand in your pee?
me, also ignoring idiot: no, it gets washes away.
3 other dudes (one kicking the idiot's seat): yeah.
me: in fact, that's problem the safest time to do it. i mean, its going to be really tough to miss your tub.
mr butler: quien estan urinando aqui?
coitus: nobody, faggot.
me: i'm willing to be that every guy in here pees in the shower.
dude to my left: i once took a shower just so i could pee in it because i was too lazy to put the toilet seat up.
her: that's ridiculous. it took 20 times more work to do that.
pretty girl i would sneak glances at across the room: yeah. you would have to towel off, change your clothe...
me: yeah but he never had to put the toilet seat up.
left and right dudes: amen.
idiot: what's wrong with taking a bath?
mr butler: idiota!
i then started to wonder how much of a man's life was spent peeing in the shower. originally, i suggested that the average urinating session was 20 seconds, but the class unanimously agreed that was too long. so three guys stood up and pantomined peeing in the shower. they all finished around the same time. the pretty girl that sat across the room said, "that was 12 seconds." i knew i liked her for a reason.
so we worked with the 12 second rule.
12 seconds times 2 showers a day for 7 days equals 168 seconds of in shower urination.
multiply that by 52 weeks and that gives us 8,736 seconds of in shower urination per year.
we then assumed the average lifetime was 79 years.
our new total was 690,144 seconds of in shower urination.
divide that by 60 seconds in a minute, 60 minutes in an hour and 24 hours in a day and the total is 7.9877777 days of in shower urination. that's the equivalent to waking up at 7am on a monday morning and peeing in the shower until the 6:52am on tuesday of the next week.
we spend 8 days of our lives enjoying this particular endeavor.
i never calculated how much is produced. i just looked it up online and discovered that we create 40-60 ounces of urine a day. now i just need to figure out how much is excreted during 20, no, excuse me, 12 seconds of in shower urination.
me: what? you don't pee in the shower?
her: eeewww. no.
me: so you pee in the bath?
dude to my left: eeeew, peeing in the bath? she's so gross.
dude to my right: yeah you are so nasty.
her: no, i don't pee while bathing. that's -
chick behind me: -so fucking gross!
dude all the way across the room that nobody has ever spoken to or even acknowledged: no way! i pee in the shower every time.
2 new girls and the two original girls: eeeeewwwwww!
idiot nobody likes: why are we talking about pee?
her, ignoring idiot: i'm going to be sick. you stand in your pee?
me, also ignoring idiot: no, it gets washes away.
3 other dudes (one kicking the idiot's seat): yeah.
me: in fact, that's problem the safest time to do it. i mean, its going to be really tough to miss your tub.
mr butler: quien estan urinando aqui?
coitus: nobody, faggot.
me: i'm willing to be that every guy in here pees in the shower.
dude to my left: i once took a shower just so i could pee in it because i was too lazy to put the toilet seat up.
her: that's ridiculous. it took 20 times more work to do that.
pretty girl i would sneak glances at across the room: yeah. you would have to towel off, change your clothe...
me: yeah but he never had to put the toilet seat up.
left and right dudes: amen.
idiot: what's wrong with taking a bath?
mr butler: idiota!
i then started to wonder how much of a man's life was spent peeing in the shower. originally, i suggested that the average urinating session was 20 seconds, but the class unanimously agreed that was too long. so three guys stood up and pantomined peeing in the shower. they all finished around the same time. the pretty girl that sat across the room said, "that was 12 seconds." i knew i liked her for a reason.
so we worked with the 12 second rule.
12 seconds times 2 showers a day for 7 days equals 168 seconds of in shower urination.
multiply that by 52 weeks and that gives us 8,736 seconds of in shower urination per year.
we then assumed the average lifetime was 79 years.
our new total was 690,144 seconds of in shower urination.
divide that by 60 seconds in a minute, 60 minutes in an hour and 24 hours in a day and the total is 7.9877777 days of in shower urination. that's the equivalent to waking up at 7am on a monday morning and peeing in the shower until the 6:52am on tuesday of the next week.
we spend 8 days of our lives enjoying this particular endeavor.
i never calculated how much is produced. i just looked it up online and discovered that we create 40-60 ounces of urine a day. now i just need to figure out how much is excreted during 20, no, excuse me, 12 seconds of in shower urination.