Meme: Bulletproof Storykinks
Stealin' from askerian. 'Scuse me, gotta evade the cops now. (Also, I probably did this a little wrong, but... oh well.)
1. PLOOOOOOOOT. I mean, pwp's okay in limited doses, but man oh man an outside world with events and effects and people who don't give two swipes for the "central" feature of the story and have their own agendas? Unf.
2. BRAINS. One of the top things that can make me backclick with prejudice: characters who behave like they should be riding the short bus. Even if they're using twenty-letter words. Perhaps especially if they're using twenty-letter words. Seriously, I don't care how much technobabble your character's getting from the thesaurus you Googled to put in their head. One, they're probably using the words wrong. Two, it's entirely possible to have extremely complex machinations going on without using a word your average twelve-year-old won't know. (No, really. You ever seen playground politics? An eight-year-old can launch a vicious propaganda campaign with two snapshots and a net connection anymore.)
3. Relationships that require effort. Not "oh my beloved, we are two gay cowboys under the thumbs of our feuding banjo clans and the jealous rapist king; I shall fake my death with poison and we can run away and live buttsexily ever after~~<3", which is all about outside forces. (Name that reference, get bonus points.) Not that outside forces are bad, see #1, but I like a relationship that isn't wuv at first sight and does have actual obstacles to overcome. (Liiiiiike... being one's nonviolent criminal rival.) Same applies to friendship and family: it isn't all "bestest fwiends 4 eva no prob!" (see: Ron and Harry, GoF) or either side of the adoption trope ("we've never met because I was adopted, but we're relatives! hugs!" or "you're my real famiwy now, hugs!").
4. (Believably) Multi-faceted Characters. Like the Kurama who protects his mom, is kind to injured fire demons dumb enough to ambush him, fights alongside Yuusuke and is buddies with Kuwabara... and is an evil bastard with a tendency to defeat his enemies thoroughly and then execute them. The Yukina who purges her traumas in the dark of the night, who screams at her brother when he's being an idiot because she's human enough for that, who can and will euthanize someone because she's ice enough for that. The Botan with a scimitar smile keeping the horrors of death at bay. The Conan balanced on a knife-edge of despair. NOT like the Relena Who Is Sekritly A Jealous Harpy Blackmailer/Rapist, because that's not believeable-- she endures bad situations, or gets out of them, she doesn't turn violent. (The story doesn't have to be about the listed facets-- but I can tell when the author recognizes more than one dimension in a character.)
5. Earth Logic. It's perfectly okay for a story to have "wave your hands and say alakazaam" work, or "awesome teenage genius detective prodigies are a dime a dozen" -- that's genre and stuff -- but you gotta be internally consistent. You're still writing people, for one, so it is Not Cool to do things like "hi! I'm part of a secret organization, let me tell you my super-secret traumatic life story!" (This is commonly used in crossovers as a cheap way of telling the fans of one storyline who the heck these other people are.) Also, spells of Ultimate Evil cannot be used by the good guys without repercussions, I'm looking at you JKR. So forth.
1. PLOOOOOOOOT. I mean, pwp's okay in limited doses, but man oh man an outside world with events and effects and people who don't give two swipes for the "central" feature of the story and have their own agendas? Unf.
2. BRAINS. One of the top things that can make me backclick with prejudice: characters who behave like they should be riding the short bus. Even if they're using twenty-letter words. Perhaps especially if they're using twenty-letter words. Seriously, I don't care how much technobabble your character's getting from the thesaurus you Googled to put in their head. One, they're probably using the words wrong. Two, it's entirely possible to have extremely complex machinations going on without using a word your average twelve-year-old won't know. (No, really. You ever seen playground politics? An eight-year-old can launch a vicious propaganda campaign with two snapshots and a net connection anymore.)
3. Relationships that require effort. Not "oh my beloved, we are two gay cowboys under the thumbs of our feuding banjo clans and the jealous rapist king; I shall fake my death with poison and we can run away and live buttsexily ever after~~<3", which is all about outside forces. (Name that reference, get bonus points.) Not that outside forces are bad, see #1, but I like a relationship that isn't wuv at first sight and does have actual obstacles to overcome. (Liiiiiike... being one's nonviolent criminal rival.) Same applies to friendship and family: it isn't all "bestest fwiends 4 eva no prob!" (see: Ron and Harry, GoF) or either side of the adoption trope ("we've never met because I was adopted, but we're relatives! hugs!" or "you're my real famiwy now, hugs!").
4. (Believably) Multi-faceted Characters. Like the Kurama who protects his mom, is kind to injured fire demons dumb enough to ambush him, fights alongside Yuusuke and is buddies with Kuwabara... and is an evil bastard with a tendency to defeat his enemies thoroughly and then execute them. The Yukina who purges her traumas in the dark of the night, who screams at her brother when he's being an idiot because she's human enough for that, who can and will euthanize someone because she's ice enough for that. The Botan with a scimitar smile keeping the horrors of death at bay. The Conan balanced on a knife-edge of despair. NOT like the Relena Who Is Sekritly A Jealous Harpy Blackmailer/Rapist, because that's not believeable-- she endures bad situations, or gets out of them, she doesn't turn violent. (The story doesn't have to be about the listed facets-- but I can tell when the author recognizes more than one dimension in a character.)
5. Earth Logic. It's perfectly okay for a story to have "wave your hands and say alakazaam" work, or "awesome teenage genius detective prodigies are a dime a dozen" -- that's genre and stuff -- but you gotta be internally consistent. You're still writing people, for one, so it is Not Cool to do things like "hi! I'm part of a secret organization, let me tell you my super-secret traumatic life story!" (This is commonly used in crossovers as a cheap way of telling the fans of one storyline who the heck these other people are.) Also, spells of Ultimate Evil cannot be used by the good guys without repercussions, I'm looking at you JKR. So forth.